Bleed Out & Sneeze Teleport

Million Dollars, But...: Bleed Out & Sneeze Teleport

For the Season Finale, Michael joins Gavin and Burnie as they teleport around the world and enjoy each others farts. Get the Million Dollars, But Shirt: http://bit.ly/MDBshirt

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Comments (158)

  • snark_mutt FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    2 months ago

    Savory farts... a million dollars for what I already do anyway?

  • Klorix FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    3 months ago

    Thanks for the laugh, guys!

  • RivenDaniel1 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    holy shit........I have sneezing fits that last up to half an hour........


  • Blackx4 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Thankfully I have PSR (photic sneeze reflex), so I would just stare at the sun and sneeze.

  • SRob "The Magnanimous"

    1 year ago

    the bleeding would get you out of any fight because they'd figure they had killed you

  • Loli_King4_Life

    1 year ago

    I love how they do the voice overs of each other XD

  • RagArk

    1 year ago

    It was Michael!! Mystery solved gang! Listen to podcast 346.

    • ryholol FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Yes! I watched all the videos trying to find it

    • Variam FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Exactly why I rewatched this!

  • TurosKensei

    1 year ago

    Random teleportation in a world composed mostly of water and places that are NOT on the ground? I wouldn't risk it.

    • dunlaw FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Sneeze in the occean

  • ChrisTorres

    1 year ago

    Michael wipes from the front(10/19/15)(RT PODCAST)

    • Bedhead99 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      is that weird?

    • ryholol FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Yes. Very

    • Dboss2289 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      That's how I do it, and now i have to do research to see if I'm doing it wrong...

  • Biscuit12 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Million Dollars but;

    every time you see your own reflection, you immediately have to masturbate

    • Loli_King4_Life

      1 year ago

      that would be sooo fucking weird, but kinda funny. like if one of my friends walked in, they'd be like uuuuuh. My best friend would probably understand right away and be like, I'll just wait upstairs and let you finish lol.

    • Biscuit12 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Also....Imagine it's raining and you see your own reflection in a puddle. Then you are just masturbating in the rain

    • rllebron

      1 year ago

      At least no one would see my tears when I cried masturbating in the rain because I'm all alone

  • JavinJosephH

    1 year ago

    Million dollars but;

    You have to live in Florida.

  • reddead405 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold The Soviet Bear

    1 year ago

    Million dollars but... morgan freeman will narrate the rest of your life constantly, however as soon as you don't notice it anymore he stops. and as soon as you don't notice he's not there anymore he starts again. it's a perpetual cycle that goes on for the rest of your life, and your the only one who can here it. also he does not at any point acknowledge his own existence while narrating.

    • GreyLight FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Doesn't acknowledge his own existence? Deal breaker

    • Mr_Charles_Casey FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Martial Guitarist

      1 year ago

      That actually sounds like a dream come true.

      But I guess it would be inconvient at times. Private moments. XD

    • JerichoF FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Are you able to record Morgan Freeman narrating you recording him, or would that cancel out acknowledging his own existence? Or, that aside, if you watch a movie that has Morgan Freeman in it, will Narrator Morgan Freeman narrate that you're watching a movie that has Morgan Freeman in it?

    • reddead405 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold The Soviet Bear

      1 year ago

      didn't notice the replies till today, derp :/ but anyways @JerichoF no to the recording bit, and yes to the second bit. when i say he never notices his own existence as the narrator. if you do something like watch a movie with him in it or have him mentioned in a conversation. then he will of course narrate that you talked about morgan freeman or watched morgan freeman.it's sorta like a voice in your head kinda thing.

  • PaladinNull

    1 year ago

    I never sneeze just once, its always in sets of 5 or more, so the idea of teleporting randomly in the world every time that happens feels pretty annoying

  • TankCatapult

    1 year ago

    Million dollars, but... Every dump you take for the rest of your life, comes to life and you have to name it.

  • BellaMills31 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    both Michael and Gavin's socks looked awesome!

  • DontPantsMe

    1 year ago

    Besides the podcast, this is probably my favourite Roosterteeth production. Great stuff.

  • jlil001 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    ill take option 1 and 3 north Alaska here I come

  • NxtSyn

    1 year ago

    I want those AH socks

  • wasplord Elliot

    1 year ago

    I would take the bleeding one it'd be fun to fuck with people

  • WilliamEllis FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    what would happen if a mosquito bit you for Gavin's MDB, would there all of a sudden be a giant sized mosquito or would it just pop.

    • jlil001 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      that sounds horrifying dude

    • Mr_Charles_Casey FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Martial Guitarist

      1 year ago

      It might drown, but I'm more concerned with the bite. Like, do you keep losing blood, just like on a microscopic level, or does it go away?

  • Aohaku

    1 year ago

    Something about the teleportation one... 3/4 of the planet is covered in water of some variety, most of it ocean. So you sneeze, and odds are you've just teleported somewhere in the ocean (I'm assuming surface since you said on the surface of the planet, but still).

  • Valkea

    1 year ago

    So for the bleeding one...do periods count or....?

    • jungleman96 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      they were 3 guys...

  • Jaworth

    1 year ago

    Since when are there lions in the amazon?

    • hernanda3 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Wolfbrother

      1 year ago

      It probably got there the same way Michael did, by sneezing.

  • SCARV

    1 year ago

    Know where else where you could teleport that exists on Earth? A fucking volcano... Enjoy you million after becoming melded with fucking lava asshole.

  • cerbalpirate

    1 year ago

    What if you sneeze in the shower or something? And once you sneeze how do you get back?

  • Blueace42

    1 year ago

    "I bet it was Gesundheit" More like GesundHEIST *ba dum tsss*

  • xofors2 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    with the sneezing on it must suck when you get a cold.

  • ShrekHasEbola ShrekHasEbola

    1 year ago

    Sneezing one is easy, as long as you keep your eyes open, you can't sneeze. A million bucks for doing something I already do!

  • Pimator89

    1 year ago

    about the heist sneeze, you sneeze your way out of here, but teleport inside a police station.

    The gun, the mask and a bag full of money... Even if they don't know you, good luck explaining that one !

  • KyleWilson2

    1 year ago

    couldnt do the sneezing one. i sneeze at the sun so any time i go outside id end up somewhere else. not to mention that any time i sneeze somewhere inside then teleport somewhere outside, id basically teleport 2 or 3 times in a row.

  • KyleWilson2

    1 year ago

    couldnt do the sneezing one. i sneeze at the sun so any time i go outside id end up somewhere else. not to mention that any time i sneeze somewhere inside then teleport somewhere outside, id basically teleport 2 or 3 times in a row.

  • -Cinnamonster- FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    would suck if you sneezed while driving

  • ChibiAcer FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    I can't see the sneeze thing being worth it. Unless you got lucky you'd pretty much need to buy plane tickets every time to get back home.

    • Ghostofnight FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Combined with the fact that you probably don't want to go to the majority of places in the world. The chances of you landing somewhere safe that you also want to be in would be pretty darn low.

    • Commando_Joe

      1 year ago

      You'd probably just end up in the ocean and drown. Considering that's the majority of the planet.

    • KyleWilson2

      1 year ago

      unless you sneeze enough times you can end up back at home

  • wigglytadpol

    1 year ago

    Million dollars, but whenever someone in the same room as you farts, everyone thinks it was you. No matter how blatant it was that someone else did the deed, you get the blame.

  • AMK972 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Alex

    1 year ago

    Michael's voice on Burnie was oddly entertaining.

  • GabePurateku

    1 year ago

    I'd say yes to the sneeze one. Would probably need to carry a sattallite phone and other survival supplies at all times in case I end up someplace less than idea, though

    • Chessrook44

      1 year ago

      Well you have a 3 out of four chance of ending up standing in the middle of the ocean... not on an island, just in the ocean...

    • Wary FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      the only thing you need to bring with you is pepper. keep sneezing till you find a place you like.

  • Dachal123 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Couldn't do the fart or blood things, but the sneeze is awesome. It's like a superpower! Just carry something to make you sneeze.

    • Dachal123 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      P.S. Michael has awesome hair.

  • Sapphiet

    1 year ago

    O.O The blood part was shocking

  • Hafgan FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    But... what about when you're on your period?

    • Sapphiet

      1 year ago

      O.O I don't even want to think about it

    • corbandioxide FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      It would just be over immediately right? It's just one constant bleed!

  • bbrodriguez

    1 year ago

    You could say it was a.... Gesundheist

    • shoyle493 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      goddammit, barb...

    • AMK972 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Alex

      1 year ago

      Booooo

  • MirrorsWish

    1 year ago

    Now all I can imagine is The Fake AH Crew sneezing their way out of a heist or some shit like that.

  • denDAY04 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Why would you ever take the sneeze money? Considering that the surface of our planet is made of a whole lot of water, the probability of you drowning withing ten sneezes is very high.

  • flamespirits FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    If a guy sneezed during sex...ends up in an all male prison totally naked, or a school, or even someone's wedding or funeral. Yup, can't see how that wouldn't be hilarious haha

  • megasean3000 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Just imagine if you're in a zombie apocalypse and you get eaten by zombies, it'd be like a banquet for them! xD

  • snowyalice FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold ESPURRS!

    1 year ago

    Burnie thinks his was an unnoticed fart but the guy behind him says otherwise.

  • Born2beSlick FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Why did I eat whilst watching this?

  • Jingo4754 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    I like how Michael figured out how to make the teleport sneezing useful for robbing banks XD

  • Meelis13 Estonian

    1 year ago

    all i can think for some reason, is that what would happen with women due to their period in that bleeding one.

    • EvieMoon FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Wordsmith

      1 year ago

      A period is not the same as actually bleeding. I think we'd be okay. :D

  • VDKSpirit Queen of Tech

    1 year ago

    "So you know when you've taken too many dumps, and your anus starts to bleed because it's raw..."

    Has anyone.... Has anyone ever experienced this? Is this really a thing???

    • Icecase FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Yes.

    • VDKSpirit Queen of Tech

      1 year ago

      I legit can't tell if you're answering my question or just messing with me :S :L

    • Coverf1r3 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      How thoroughly are you wiping? If you're really getting in there and making sure your ass is clean then yeah, you're gonna get a little blood if you wipe too often in a short time-period.

    • Meelis13 Estonian

      1 year ago

      well, blood can be in your dump for several reasons (including internal bleeding (what would be case in that)).

    • amexicandeer FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      dude, if you get really bad diarrhea, you can cause your anus to bleed from wiping up that mess or if you just take one big turd.

  • ryan__mac FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    This is one of my new favourite shows!