Magic Dogs & Muscle Men

Million Dollars, But...: Magic Dogs & Muscle Men

This week, Colton Dunn joins Chris and Burnie to discuss what he would do for $1 million. Not even magic dogs and vomiting spaghetti will get between them and their money.

Featuring:

Burnie Burns

Chris Demarais

Colton Dunn

David Schachterle as Burnie's Bodybuilder

Devon Robinson as Colton's Bodybuilder

Raquel Whitney as Colton's Mother

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Comments (114)

  • DJ_Iceman FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    I'd take the million dollars and be pushed around everywhere by a hot, muscular guy. Hello, handsome.

  • elliotnash

    1 year ago

    For some reason I can't load this video. Any ideas why?

  • Jaworth

    1 year ago

    You get a million dollars, but... nobody is in any way attractive to you. Going out with a hot girl/guy (depending) has zero appeal. Do you take it?

    • jlil001 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      yes my turn ok you get a million dollars for a full year anything that could make your hole day hell you cant let it bother you at all but everyday for the whole year something happens that would normally piss you the hell off would happen and if you dont loose it at all in that whole year of hell and not let it get to you at all there is an other million dollars waiting for you fail at any point you loose the million bucks and dont get the 2nd million me no i would not do it

    • Jaworth

      1 year ago

      @jlil001 probably not. I've very easily annoyed and I doubt I would last a single week.

    • tw11nGem11n11 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Swarm of Vengeful Crows

      1 year ago

      im already asexual, id take it in a heartbeat

    • Mr_Charles_Casey FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Martial Guitarist

      1 year ago

      @jlil001 Puncuation is very important, kids.

  • generaljona

    1 year ago

    what the fuck is this comments all it is is a bunch of bullshit ads

  • NemoV

    1 year ago

    lol

  • TankCatapult

    1 year ago

    You get one million dollars, but every transaction you make with the million, legal and not, is texted (location, amount spent, what was purchased) to everyone, including the local law enforcement of your area. Do you take the million?

    • AmariT FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      How many illegal transactions do you make?

    • coffeemug FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Mr?

      1 year ago

      Ohhh very nice...my life style, absoultly not lol

    • Jaworth

      1 year ago

      Absolutely. I don't buy anything weird enough to be worried.

  • teamxp2001

    1 year ago

    Haha,. very funny stuff. I love they're sense of humor. Always make me laugh.

  • SomeKindofCaveDemon FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Man I'm SO glad Lazer Team brought Colton into such close quarters with Rooster Teeth. His sense of humor is absolutely perfect for RT.


    All 3 of these scenarios were solid gold, btw. This show idea is just amazing, I love it.

  • thesweetsmoore FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    I love Colton's sense of humor. Please have him on as a guest more often man lol

  • Wafflepann FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    @15 sec, that beat goes hard as fuck.

  • anellg FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Bella is best dog

  • Kallentide FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Aww, <3 Brandon. Also, this Colton guy is pretty funny but cold!

  • mr-kab-uki FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    This was too funny! Colton is the best!

  • spencerclark

    1 year ago

    Here's my million dollar question, you get $1 million dollars, however, for the rest of your life any dream you have with other people (real people) that person will have the exact same dream and they know that dream came from you.

    • SpleeSpree FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold I Got Dem Braindawgs

      1 year ago

      That's pretty good. I don't know if I would take that or not. Probably would. It's really their problem more than mine!

    • cpond1 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Sounds good to me, I'm a lucid dreamer, it'd be like the Magic Schoolbus every night. :D

    • Connor_J_Bailey FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold *Finger Pistol*

      1 year ago

      I would do that. The first time would be awkward but after a while it would be okay and they would learn to deal with it.

  • sonny88p

    1 year ago

    Did anybody else have a flashback to the spaghetti dog?

    tumblr_ni53mtbD9C1qfgg1ao7_250.gif

  • aceofalex FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Ally

    1 year ago

    Is that Jon Risinger's dog?

    • SpleeSpree FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold I Got Dem Braindawgs

      1 year ago

      Yes, it's Bella the Luckdragon.

  • MJPOWER FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    i love this show to much :

  • ReginaVD

    1 year ago

    Gimme that fucking dog. I don't go out much anyway and I live alone. Heckie yes doggie

  • JakeFrosty77

    1 year ago

    "Say theres someone you don't like" Brandon walks into scene. hahaha

  • GeeeReg FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Now with 20% less fat!

    1 year ago

    I love that Chris referred to it as an Italian "Dinner Store" instead of, you know, a restaurant. Oh Chris, never change.

  • PowerfulTux FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Colton is a seriously funny dude. He's been killing it (pun intended) in all the RT stuff he's been in so far.

  • The_Humble_Elephant FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Never Forget

    1 year ago

    I love this show. Colton shooting the dog was great, not one bullet but three.

  • IceLordCryo FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    oh my god i love this show XD

  • Saangreal FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    It is like if rtaa was acted out instead of drawn.

  • Burning1nWat FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    This show is way better than RT Shorts today.

    • Kalilaila FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Chaos Light

      1 year ago

      This show is great. It gives RT a great way to showcase other members of the team that we have not seen before and/or wouldn't otherwise have a reason to see on camera. It also allows us a glimpse into how each person thinks.

  • GalikJ1302 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    i don't know what it is but for some reason on this site i can barely manage to play 360p for videos, but for YouTube and almost everywhere else i can play full HD. i dont understand what wrong

    • RachelRules FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold BurnieLvr9000

      1 year ago

      My player always does Auto on the quality, and I always have to change it to 1080p because Auto just makes it non-HD.

    • JohnnySh4dow FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      I have the same problem hopefully it will change once all the bugs are gone.

    • Resply FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold FH > AH

      1 year ago

      Same, when I was watching last X-ray and Vav, I had to pause the video like, every 10 seconds to let it buffer. On the lowest quality... On youtube, I'm watching 1080p without any problems

  • Lixamarz

    1 year ago

    Lol! I couldn't help but laugh when Colton said he would kill the magic dog even though it was also sad to kill the magic dog! I feel so Conflicted..... But I'll totally do the muscle guy. I mean for a year I don't have to walk anywhere and I get a million dollars?! YES!!

    • JohnnySh4dow FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      1 year ago

      Hahah me 2, i would let the muscle guy push me around even if i didn't get a million dollars. heck i would pay 1 million dollars

  • Blueace42

    1 year ago

    So is this a sponsor-only video, or will it eventually be released to the public?

    • Holocene FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Panic word is Jenga

      1 year ago

      The video will release at the normal time for the public. Sponsor's get a slightly earlier viewing.

  • raynewater FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    so... is anyone keeping a spreadsheet on how much money/all the perks everyone's got so far?

  • White_Rice FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold PE/\KE!!!!

    1 year ago

    I'm a gay male so the first situation sounds win win but having the magic dog would kill me. How could I ignore something so perfect and cute.

  • Jonny1513 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold :D

    1 year ago

    Colton is a savage

  • Shadow20010

    1 year ago

    great video XD also funny dark ending with that dog

  • good2cya FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Horse McDoomkook

    1 year ago

    Colton at the end lol XD dear lord

  • AbstractSpaces FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    Jesus christ Colton I was not prepared for your cold hearted attitude to the dog. Had me losing it laughing in a library.

  • TheRTV FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Round Peg in Square Hole

    1 year ago

    I like how Burnie's situation was a million dollars and you live with Wilfred for a year.

  • DaruSH FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Eater of Time and Basil

    1 year ago

    If you ignore the magic dog, doesn't it lose its magicalness?

    Then once it's a normal dog, Colton could use it to pick up chicks.(so to speak)

  • Heyyjeffrey Nurse /\

    1 year ago

    Best one so far? The muscular man was funny af

  • YooniqueKwon FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold PhD in Sarcasm

    1 year ago

    So Colton would not be able to be a Kingsman (High five to those who get it)...

  • canadaman13

    1 year ago

    Well that took a dark turn at the end...lol

  • FineDiningForHobos FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Best Damn Soup Kitchen

    1 year ago

    That shit eating grin, though.

  • Shelty429 Mr Bill

    1 year ago

    I love this show so much. Colton is funny as hell!

  • MopMaster

    1 year ago

    How about this; You get ten million tax-free dollars, easily enough to live out your days in comfort. But for the rest of your life, everyone you've ever had sex with (even if you pull out, or dry-hump) has their tongue turn into a big gross spider (this retroactively includes people from before you accepted the bet). They'll still be able to talk normally and taste and everything, but anytime they try to speak, or eat in public, people will recoil in horror. And everyone will know the cause.

    • JKShulenburg FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold JKShulenburg

      1 year ago

      No contest. Pay me. Pay me now.Lets make thishappen

  • lukeglover80 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold RT is Great!

    1 year ago

    Oh man. I dont normally cringe, but the dog pooping and then Brandons face with the chocolate, still made me think of how gross that would be.

  • ProjectGnome FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold ProjectGnome

    1 year ago

    I really hope that they hire Colton, he would make a superb edition to RoosterTeeth!!!

    • lukeglover80 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold RT is Great!

      1 year ago

      That would be great! They've flown him out a couple times to have him in things, so I hope so. It'd be worth it :P

  • oodVoo

    1 year ago

    i'm loving this better then the RT shorts. I wont leave you RT shorts, it will just be an open relationship ;)

  • RomanHeretic FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Needs a patch

    1 year ago

    I lost it at the end. Not very good for my recovering illness and almost died from coughing, but it was a glorious almost-death.

  • Noblelance FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold The Pun-isher

    1 year ago

    Is it wrong I got a little sad thinking Bella getting a double tap?

  • csfarrington FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Gamer mom

    1 year ago

    LOL! Colton is awesome. :D I would love to see him in more of your videos and the AH Let's Plays. He's amazing.

  • astralTYRANT FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

    1 year ago

    This is easily becoming one of my all-time favorite shows. The episodes are just so damn funny. Thanks a million, guys! Keep it up!

  • MattSafc73 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Ha'way The Lads

    1 year ago

    Colton is awesome. That dude should be in more videos.