Post the lines that stick in your mind or make you laugh or make you ask, "WTF?!"
I thought this exchange was pretty funny:
Tech Support: Tech support. Guy: Yeah... yeah my-h, my weapon's jammed. Ugh. Tech Support: Okay, no problem. You know what model you're running today? Bidderman: Yeah it's a-
A round grazes him
Bidderman: Ugh. U-e-ough, uh. Tech Support: You sound busy. Maybe you should call back at another time. Guy: H-H-4-5! My my gun, my gun's an H-H-4-5. Tech Support: Hey ah, do you know what software version you're runnin'. Guy: I uh... Tech Support: Sir? Guy: Thi this thing runs software? Tech Support: Okay, you know what? Let's go ahead and restart. I want you to eject the mag, then I want you to press and hold the trigger for sixty seconds that's six zero. Can you do that? Guy: Sixty seconds? Ah-are are you kidding me uh- I'm in the middle of a firefight.
Here's another one that I found amusing:
Tech Support: Sir, never disparage the readout.
There are quite a few more but I don't want to post them all myself so I'll leave some for the rest of you who have quotes that you want to post.
There's only one rule in this thread: Have fun with it.
Bidderman: Holy crap. Is that voice comming from that tree? Tree: Yes
Tree: You are a holder of the magic Bidderman: What? But there's no such thing as magic. Tree: You're talking to a talking tree. Bidderman: You make a good point, but wait. how.. how can that be? Tree: Because of your essence. Bidderman: Essence, isnt that like a shampoo? Tree: It's a magical force. Bidderman: No no, I have no essence. Tree: Yes you do, everybody has essence. Bidderman: I don't. Tree: Yes you do, here look.
Troll 1: Alright, let's do this right. Boss says we can't make any mistakes this time. Troll 2: How come this time? Troll 1: Huh? Troll 2: Well, I mean like he always says that. I mean, at what point is he gonna say "Okay, this time guys you can totally fuck everything up if you want to"? Troll 1: Yeah, sarcasm. That helps.
Tech: Still holding down that trigger? Bidderman: Umm, Yes Tech: Ok, about 30 more seconds Bidderman: Jesus, Why does this thing take so long? Tech: Yeah, we designed it that way because uh, we charge by the minute for the tech support Bidderman: . . . Tech: Just kidding sorta
Human guy: ok johnson, lay down some cover fire *POW* Johnson: OW! Fuck you, you lay down some cover fire Human guy: Whats the deal Johnson? You think that guy is magical Johnson: I do not Human guy: Yes you do, you think that guy is magical Johnson: I do not, i do not think that guy is magical
My favorite is in the second episode when Bidderman is talking to the tree. Bidderman- What? But there's no such thing as magic. Glowing Tree- You're talking to a glowing tree. Bidderman- You make a good point, but wait......how........how can that be?