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DiMono Site Admin
DiMono Site Admin
Time to lose some weightSo as I'm sure many of you know, I've been seriously working out for about 3 1/2 months now. Well, having put on a bunch of muscle and a bunch of fat, it's now time to cut the fat away and reveal the true shape of my muscles. My goal is to cut off 10lbs 15lbs after learning my scale is reading 10lbs too low in under 2 weeks. I will achieve this for four reasons:

1. I know how to change my diet
2. I have tremendous self-discipline
3. I will continue to work out, the lack of which is why all diets fail
4. I am awesome

And don't forget, a truly dramatic article for How To Not Suck goes up tomorrow. Since it's almost 7:30, it actually goes up in a matter of hours. It's an installment you definitely want to read.
7 years ago  |  Comments (10)  |  + 1 Cool
DiMono Site Admin
How To Not Suck newsAfter a 1 month break, a new installment of How To Not Suck is going up tomorrow. It's something entirely different than all articles before it, so watch for it! The contents of the article may actually shock you.
7 years ago  |  Comments (7)
DiMono Site Admin
Practicing what I preachYesterday I tore a strip off someone for walking able-bodily through the handicap door. Our interaction follows:
* He pushes the button and waits for the door to open, as I open the door 2 doors over and walk through *

Me: Or you could try using your hand.

Him: I-

Me: Don't be so fucking lazy.

He said something after that, but I didn't hear it and I don't care what it was. I didn't just bold that end part for the fun of it, either; I spat those words at him like a lifetime of congealed bile.

I also know when not to spit bile at people. I heard this beauty from one dumb fucking kid to another on the way to the train station after work yesterday:
Him: I hate being in jail by myself.

Me: Have you tried not being in jail at all, you fucking moron?

I didn't say that line out loud though, because I didn't want to get shanked. Some people are just too stupid to live.
7 years ago  |  Comments (24)  |  + 9 Funny
DiMono Site Admin
Things I hateI hate getting distracted in the middle of a workout by something not even remotely related to exercise, which distracts me from finishing my workout and I have to cut it short.

I hate having to stay up until all hours of the morning waiting on laundry so I can finally go to bed in time to wake up at 6:30 for work.

I hate looking over at my alarm clock in the morning and seeing 7:10 on it, knowing that I set it the night before and thus must have woken up, turned it off, and rolled back over, but not remembering doing it.

I hate that sinking feeling that you're not accomplishing anything that matters, and that all you're doing is using up time and space and not actually contributing anything useful to the world.

The first three items in that list are things that happened to me last night. The last one is a feeling that's been slowly growing inside of me over the past month or so, numbing me to the outside world. I have about twenty things on my list of important shit to do, without exagerating, and I don't have the time I need to get those things done. On the list:

12 novels including a 5 book fantasy anthology
3 screenplays
1 giant charity concert
2 websites currently in progress
3 websites in the planning phase
bring down the oil companies (no, I'm not kidding)
bring down the diamond industry (again, not kidding)
release a music CD

The biggest roadblock? Honestly? Not having a laptop with a reliable battery. All I need in a laptop is some random word processor, and a way to get files off the computer. MS-DOS 4.11 and Word Perfect 5.1 would do me just fine (and I have both, in fact). I spend fully an hour and a half every weekday travelling to and from work on the train, with no way to be productive; instead I read. I'm learning to despise Charles Dickens for writing with such convoluted English.

So, does anyone have a laptop with a good battery they can give me for free?
7 years ago  |  Comments (12)
DiMono Site Admin
The end of Red vs BlueAccording to Burns, and Geoff and Gus, episode 100 will be the very end of RvB. I've asked a very important question on Rooster Tooths, which I think people will be interested in: What comes next?
7 years ago  |  Comments (27)
DiMono Site Admin
Were you an April Fool?So yes, Rooster Tooths did indeed drop off the face of the Earth yesterday. It's back now. In the last six months I have never seen the site have nobody browsing it, so I have a rough idea of how important it is to the Red vs Blue community; I wouldn't take it offline like that. It was important to kill it for the effect of my April 1 prank though, and I thank all those who realized what was really going on and kept quiet about it.

The other site I mentioned, Email Poetry, is most definitely not another part of that prank though. It is indeed a real website, and I do indeed plan to keep it active for as long as people find it interesting. I may even format and add some forums and stuff to it so it can become a community of people who enjoy making stuff out of the hitherto-useless spam they receive. And please do be sure to digg it if you like it, as digg.com is a vital tool for viral websites.
7 years ago  |  Comments (9)
DiMono Site Admin
Too busy for lifeSo recently everything in my life has been picking up steam: work, websites, exercise, time with the girlfriend... There just aren't enough hours in the day to do all the things I want to do. Sadly, I've come to the conclusion that I need to remove some of the more time consuming items from my schedule.

The first of these items is Rooster Tooths. I know it gets frequent traffic, but I just don't have the time or energy to keep it up to date. Normally I'd let a defunct website just rot in place, but my commitment to Rooster Tooths over the last two years has been so strong that leaving it up would only serve as a constant reminder of my inability to handle all the things in my life as they need to be handled. As such, Rooster Tooths will officially go offline this weekend.


From the ashes of a very large website comes the creation of a very small website. You'll never guess what I found a use for... If you like it, be sure to digg it
8 years ago  |  Comments (11)
DiMono Site Admin
Five cool ways to be totally emoIn general, being emo both sucks and blows. That is, unless you go out of your way to have fun with it.

Five cool ways to be totally emo

1. Run up to random people of the opposite sex and cry "He'll (or she'll) never love you like I love you!"

2. Listen to depressing music in public, and beatbox to it.

3. Give poetry readings about how your cat kicked your ass last week, then confess that your cat is a talking dog named Homicidal Maniac.

4. Tell people that your parents both died while you were younger, but that you learned to cope by having two penises. Bonus points on this one if you're female. Extreme bonus points if you shove a dildo down your pants beforehand, and show it along with your real penis to jack up the effect.

5. You know those dudes in Monty Python and the Holy Grail who wander around chanting and then hit themselves on the head with a bible? Do that. I recommend using a soft bible, and padding it beforehand.

And now some random emo links:

Emo Symphony - on AlbinoBlackSheep.com - this flash sparked all kinds of controversy on that site from emo kids writing in about how this flash probably killed people

E.M.O. - on NewGrounds.com; this is where that image in my gallery came from - WARNING: NSFW ads

I Must Be Emo - on AlbinoBlackSheep.com
8 years ago  |  Comments (17)  |  + 3 Funny
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