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DiMono Site Admin
DiMono Site Admin
The time is nigh...Not to be confused with Bill Nighy, a.k.a. Davey Jones in the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise. Speaking of which, Nat and I saw it opening weekend for my birthday. Good movie, great way to end the series.

More importantly, in just over 2 hours I will be on the JengaJam. I cannot promise that my clothes will stay on, but even if they do I'm still naked beneath them. I'm sorry, but there's just no escape. Trust me, you're better off this way anyway.
7 years ago  |  Comments (9)
DiMono Site Admin
We're Jammin'I hope you like jammin' too...

In roughly 24 hours I will be on the Late Night JengaJam. For those who are unaware, the JengaJam is basically a live call-in Q&A and arbitrary discussion program. You can listen in for free by downloading software from www.talkshoe.com, or you can phone in and participate with your voice for the cost of a phone call to Pennsylvania (I think... West Virginia? It's a 724 area code).

So what will we be discussing? Well, the topics will probably cover everything from RvBTO to How To Not Suck to working out to literature and philosophy. Plus that Email Poetry website I chucked up a while ago that hasn't gotten much attention yet. If you want all the sordid details, head on over to Jenga's journal (teehee, alliteration) for the skinny (or fat, whichever you prefer). If you want to have a question answered during the show but can't be there, you can even ask that question in Jenga's journal comments and he'll ask it on air. How cool is that?

I'd open up this journal for questions too, but I'd rather keep them all in one place if I can. Plus Jenga's a cool guy, he deserves some attention. The more homosexual that attention is, the better for him it will be.
7 years ago  |  Comments (7)  |  + 1 Cool
DiMono Site Admin
Anatomy of a Birthday WeekendSo this past Saturday was my 27th birthday. I spent the weekend with my girlfriend Nat. Here's what we did:

Friday night we had macaroni and meat sauce for dinner and watched Ocean's 11. Then we collapsed in to bed. It was a work day, and we were tired.

Saturday we stayed in bed until 9:30 or so, then showered and went out for breakfast. Then we saw Pirates 3: At World's End in Hi-Def at noon, and over 3 hours later we headed for home. On the way we found a Blockbuster Video with 30% off all previously viewed DVDs, and Nat picked up a couple movies, including Pirates 2. When we got home I worked out in the basement for an hour (she watched and admired, and spotted my bench press), then I showered and we went out for dinner and each had 10oz Angus steaks at Boston Pizza. Then we came home and got in bed early, then later we went to sleep.

Sunday we got up and made eggs with spinach and cheese (quiche lorraine, teehee) for brunch, and we watched Pirates 2. I dozed off about half way in to it because I've been staying up too late recently and needed the sleep. Then we went to one of Nat's cousin's engagement party, which she and I also treated as my birthday party. For having the closest birthday to the current date (go figure), I won the centerpiece. Right now it's living at Nat's place.

The birthday presents: a nice thick white bathrobe, a copy of "On Bullshit", a special edition DVD of Chasing Amy, a pair of shorts, two v-neck undershirts, and whatever my parents and grandparents gave me ...I haven't opened their cards yet, I was too tired last night. I'm thinking they all gave me money, some of which I will spend buying "Next" by Michael Crichton, and the new J.R.R. Tolkein book (Tolkein first edition FTW).

Yay me!
7 years ago  |  Comments (18)
DiMono Site Admin
My birthday, and other newsHowdy! This is a special birthday journal, so I'm being all nice and cordial and shit.

First of all, 27 years, 9 months and 2 days ago my Dad found the booze. Now it's 27 years, 9 months and 2 days later, and I turned 27 on Saturday. That puts me at about the 1/4 mark of my life. I am employed, in love, and safely have a roof over my head. All things considered, I'd say I'm doing pretty well.

Secondly, it's Monday again, which means more heart attacks were had this morning than during any other time period in the week. I'm not making that up, either: more than half the heart attacks in North America occur between 6am and 8am Monday morning. The lesson here? People would rather die than go to work. As a happy medium between those two options, there's a new How To Not Suck as of about 10 hours ago. I give you something to look forward to on Monday mornings, which means I just saved your life. That means I own you. Bring me a steak.

News item the thirde, this Thursday night at 10:30PM EST I will be the one and only guest on the one and only episode of the one and only Late Night JengaJam with the one and only Jengaship. We will talk about HTNS, Email Poetry, RvBTO, and all kinds of other topics too. You cannot afford to miss it. ...No really, if you miss it I'm taking your house and selling it on eBay. Seriously.

Update going forth, I didn't win anything in the lottery on my birthday. That's because Lottario are a bunch of cheap assholes who won't give a guy a break on his birthday. Or it's because the numbers randomly chosen for me by the machine didn't happen to match the numbers randomly chosen as the winninng numbers. Yeah, definitely one of those two reasons.

The moral of all these updates? Eat spinnach. Seriously, I had scrambled eggs with cheese and spinnach for breakfast yesterday, and they were really good. Tasted kind of like a quiche lorraine. Plus it's good for you. Spinnach!
7 years ago  |  Comments (17)  |  + 3 Cool
DiMono Site Admin
I wear 5lbs of clothingYesterday I weighed myself before and after my workout in my usual streetclothes: jeans (with wallet and keys), t-shirt, ball cap, shoes. I weighed 191.8 going in and 191.0 coming out. Today I weighed myself going in wearing my workout clothes, being shorts, t-shirt and shoes, and the scale told me 186.3. Wild.

In other news, tonight was the first workout I've ever had where my streetclothes (shorts today, it was hot) were noticably looser after finishing than they were before I started. Seriously, the difference was that big, even though it was just a standard lower body workout. Wild.
7 years ago  |  Comments (17)  |  + 1 Zing!
DiMono Site Admin
Not SuckingI'm right now writing next week's installment of HowToNotSuck. I can't tell you what it's about; you'll just have to wait. In the meantime, this week's article went up on Monday just like it should have. It's about people taking responsibility for their own actions. It is appropriately title "Take Responsibility, Asshole"

Go read it!

In other news, I've added the RSS feed to the links page. Seems lots of people aren't finding it because they're still using IE for some reason, so I've make it more readily available and explained what it has.
7 years ago  |  Comments (6)  |  + 1 Cool
DiMono Site Admin
How to have fun on a Sunday nightIn a few days is Queen Victoria's birthday. In Canada, we celebrate this by picking a nearby weekend and declaring a holiday at one end of it. This year, we get Monday (today, as it's 2AM now) off from work. That means we get to go out and get drunk and be merry on Sunday (last night, even though I haven't slept yet).

About 5 hours ago Nat and I went to Canada's Wonderland (or more specifically, to a carpool parking lot off the 400 at Major Mackenzie Drive) to watch the Victoria Day fireworks, then we went over to Bolton for karaoke. Nat doesn't sing, but I do, and I do it well. I haven't been to karaoke since before I got my braces back on over 7 months ago, and I hadn't really given a concerted effort to singing since then so I didn't know how I'd do with the braces on.

We got to the bar at about 11PM. I decided to stick with some songs I know well, instead of choosing different and new songs every time like I usually do. I wanted to sing Bon Jovi's "Dead Or Alive," but the usual karaoke host Dave wasn't there, so it wouldn't have worked as well. Instead I went with New Orleans is Sinking (by The Tragically Hip) and Mr Jones (by Counting Crows).

Wouldn't you know the song right before my first one was ACDC's Big Balls. Having some fun with it, the host (whose name is Steve, and he's a good guy) played a clip from the song Chocolate Salty Balls. Then he started up the karaoke version, sang the first verse and chorus, and handed the reigns over to me. So I sang most of Chocolate Salty Balls. The voice held up fine through it, so I knew I'd be okay. Then I sang New Orleans is Sinking to thunderous applause, and waited patiently for my second song.

Throughout the night there were a few slow songs spattered in, some of which were actually sung well, so Nat and I danced to those ones, as young sexy couples tend to do when they want people to be jealous of them. A little after 1AM it was time for Mr. Jones. About halfway through the first verse, the most ironic man I've ever met jumped on stage and joined me.

I call this guy the most ironic man I've ever met. Let me tell you why: This guy really, really likes this song. I'd go so far as to say he loves it. He got up and stood next to me, singing in to the mic with me. After the chorus, he grabbed the mic out of my hand and started singing instead of me, as opposed to singing with me. I was a bit surprised, but I just calmly grabbed the other mic and went over to Steve and said "The other guy stole my mic, could you turn this one on?" So he did.

That's not what made this guy ironic. It arguably made him a dick, but not quite ironic. What's ironic is that despite how much he clearly loved the song, he seemed to not know any of the words, and because the mic was set for my voice and I project my voice, his voice hardly carried through to the speakers at all. So here's this guy singing for all he's worth, but it's the wrong words and too quiet to be heard. Ah, the joys of being the only two sober people in a bar of drunks.

Now, even accepting that this guy was ridiculously ironic, he wasn't the funniest part of this song. Near the end, his buddy decided he was doing so poor a job that he started yelling at this ironic guy. I have no idea what he was yelling, I was too busy singing. At the end of the song, he came up to me as I was dismounting the stage and heartily congratulated me on a job well done, and completely ignored his friend.

After that song Nat and I decided to come home, so I came back on stage to say good-night to Steve before we go, because I like to say fare-thee-well to the host. I told him he puts on a good show and it was fun, and he said it was great meeting me and thanks so much for showing up.

Songs I wanted to sing but they're not available there:

Fall Out Boy - This Ain't A Scene It's An Arms Race
Bon Jovi - Thank You For Loving Me

In completely unrelated news, HowToNotSuck has received its 50,000th page view while I was singing at the bar. That's a milestone for some reason, so hooray! Also in unrelated news, the new article is out, and it's about people taking responsibility for their actions. The ironic guy had alcohol as a convenient excuse. Ah, the joys of being the only two...
8 years ago  |  Comments (10)
DiMono Site Admin
HTNS update le doucheSecond update is finished. This one should be a little more obvious than an extra menu item. ...I hope.

...HowToNotSuck.com!
8 years ago  |  Comments (9)  |  + 1 Cool
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