Well, the Reach beta is over. Save for myself and the 3,000 guys still floating around for no immediately discernible reason, the beta is closed, and it was a hell of a ride.

About thirty minutes ago the matchmaking function shut down. Before this, most game types failed to load and groups of 8 players waited and voted on game types while nothing materialized. After varying levels of network difficulties I was booted back to the default page and switched over to Theater to watch my last hurrah.

I'm one of the lucky ones. My last game was a perfect score (150-0) of Team Oddball, where I and three recently partied-up teammates completely owned the other team to the point where they never managed to get any points at all, and each of our opponents had a negative kill/death ratio. I sent friend requests to all three guys and hope to play with them again when Reach lands proper in the fall.

I've been perusing Theater since, checking out some of my worst screw ups along with my moments of glory. Invasion ended up being one of my favorite game types (unlike the rather unbalanced Spartans vs Elites), and two of my favorite game moments involve a Warthog. The first is the positive of the two, when my teammates manage to kill a Warthog gunner and I rush the fleeing driver and cut him out with an Energy Sword. It was so cool I'll bet even Laurence Fishbourne (see the Matrix: Reloaded) was jealous of the perfect timing of the strike.

The second, and significantly funnier moment was when I was defending a control point in the second stage, and fired off that sticky grenade launcher Covenant weapon at an enemy target, right at the same time three guys in a Warthog decide to ram into our barricade and I get a triple betrayal.

First time I was booted from a match in the Reach beta, but that was admittedly a pretty colossal fuck-up. Good times, nonetheless.

I'm not trying to be like the Halo 2 Twelve and fight the inevitable closing, but so long as I'm connected and can still play around with it, I will. I want this to last just a while longer....

I don't normally post so frequently, but I'm a greedy bastard and could always use an extra beta key for one of my hypothetical friends to utilize so they can be fragged by me and get off my Christmas card list that much faster (god willing).

I've spent the past two months trying to beat a large pile of games in preparation for the Reach beta, but ended up getting distracted by petty things like wrestling and trying to nail an absolutely perfect Mass Effect 2 playthrough (it is a testament to the game I'm now replaying it for the fifth time... the only other games to hold this distinction are Zelda: Ocarina of Time and Starcraft). So I've accepted that I'll put off playing all my other new games until late summer or thereabouts in preparation for Reach, which will dominate all my game time.

But why, you ask? Sure, it's cool to play a beta and see a game before it's released and have an actual role in tweaking gameplay mechanics, but it's still only four maps and will give no insight into the single player campaign. It'll be awesome at first, and then dwindle down into a few diehards and creepy Halo fanatics. Why then do I expect to play it until the beta's final day?

Because Halo is my absolute favorite multiplayer console title ever. Even Modern Warfare and Team Fortress 2 pale in comparison to the number of hours I've logged and games I've played. I'm not particularly good at the game, but it never ceases to be fun to play.

I've also never been in a beta, so maybe I'm more optimistic than the average participant (who may very well have been in the Halo 3 beta back in the day). On May 3rd, nothing will stop me from playing this game. I've been waiting for this since I got ODST back in October.

Whether or not I win the extra beta code is irrelevant; I already have my invitation. But I'm always happy to talk about this game.

That can work well in both German and English, incidentally. Guess it depends on your opinion of The Saboteur. As I mentioned in my last entry, I really did love the game.

Perhaps because I'm not as overexposed to World War II as most gamers are, the setting really appealed to me after my previous foray into similar territory- the Mercenaries series of games. I've always liked 'open world' style games that don't try to copy GTA completely, and Pandemic was good about inverting the concept with things like warring factions (and their attitudes towards you), destructible scenery, and collectible crap that actually fits thematically well. The Saboteur removes a good deal of this, because hey, the Nazis are unbelievably evil and thus everyone who opposes them is your ally. That and carting around portable nukes must've been rather difficult circa 1943.

Still, despite the decided downgrade in technology and lack of cool aerial weaponry, I found myself enjoying sneaking into Nazi encampments and blowing things up. It wasn't quite as fun as, say, Prototype and accusing soldiers of being you in disguise, but this still fulfilled my schadenfreude adequately. I also thoroughly enjoyed sniping, then timing an explosion, and throwing a base into total chaos with a few clicks of a button.

The story... was terribly cliched, but had its moments. The British were particularly funny, in their dry, sardonic manner. The protagonist of Sean Devlin was a bit too stereotypically Oirish for my tastes, but I could always chuck him off the Eiffel Tower if his dialogue irritated me. And jumping off the Eiffel Tower is fun in and of itself.

An ideal swan song for Pandemic, I should think. I'm glad to have bought it, and will truly miss the developer. That said, I think I'll go blow up a Nazi doom fortress, just for old times' sake.

Well, one month later, and I've completed only three of the fourteen games (The Saboteur, Bioshock 2, Dante's Inferno- loved the Saboteur the best, expect a full article on that one eventually). So much for rocking.

I haven't completely given up hope... it's always possible I'll be able to pull out a miracle, right? Right?

Alas, March screwed me up with two things- Wrestlemania 26 and the launch of God of War III, which led to me finally breaking down and buying Sony's deadly box, stealing my life away as I cry for more.

And I also got hooked on the Showtime series Californication and have been playing games online more and more, rediscovering my fondness for Halo as the Reach beta draws nearer. Still have to find all the audio logs in ODST for that juicy 75 gamerscore, but that can wait until I've captured a few more flags. Oh, and of course, this month I got new Modern Warfare 2 maps. 1200 MS points was a bit pricey, but I'd be lying if I didn't forget about the price a few (dozen) hours later.

And then, of course, there's Mass Effect 2. When I get my first batch of paid downloadable content and the new Kasumi girl, I'm going to restart, gladly sacrificing another 35 hours of my life to such awesomeness.

DLC is another thing I'll be bringing up in a future journal entry... presumably after I spend another $7 for Left 4 Dead's new levels.

Things are not on schedule, but I feel comfortable blaming that on unforseen kinks. I did not expect WWE to blow away my expectations, nor did I expect to be bombarded with new content for games I already own. Oh well, guess I'll just have to slog through my game pile and toss in Just Cause 2, Splinter Cell: Conviction... and whatever PS3 games I buy now that I've finished eviscerating deities in God of War III. Likely future additions include Resistance 2, Killzone 2, and Little Big Planet, especially considering those titles are about to become greatest hits and halved in price.

Summer is fast approaching, however, so I might be able to hack my way through eventually, after the Reach beta closes... and I then start playing the retail version and Starcraft II all of the time instead.

It's a great year to be a gamer. Just not a good year to be a gamer with a full time job.

My work schedule has had me working 6 and 7 day weeks fairly regularly. Day offs are never a guarantee anymore, and my schedule changes constantly to comply with shift requests. The upside to all this work is the amount of extra money I've been raking in, insuring that I can keep up with my bills and cover the cost of my student loan payments. It's also allowed me the chance to pick up some games I've been hankering for for a while, as well as more recent releases.

The pile currently contains:

Fallout 3: Game of the Year Edition
Assassin's Creed II
The Saboteur
BioShock 2
Darksiders
Aliens vs Predator

And a few older gems:

Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
Crackdown
GRAW
Gears of War (never touched the franchise)

Then there's the games I haven't obtained yet, but will soon add their considerable weight to the pile:

Battlefield: Bad Company 2
Final Fantasy XIII

And then, I still have plans to go Achievement Hunting in ODST and Dante's Inferno and L4D2. And as long as I'm on the subject, I still haven't finished Saint's Row 2 or Red Faction: Guerilla. And I've got Shadow Complex, Worms 2: Armageddon, 'Splosion Man, and Duke Nukem 3D from my list of Arcade games to actually play through at some point... not to mention an apparently regular supply of Mass Effect 2 DLC, which will easily provide the excuse I've been looking for to restart and play it all over again.

I know it seems trite to bemoan having an abundance of good games to play through, but the reason I relate to this pile as a challenge is simple: when May 3rd rolls around, I don't think I'll be playing anything besides the Halo: Reach beta. It's the first time I'll be participating in a multiplayer beta, and will be going out of my way to take in absolutely every aspect of the game I can.

I've already accepted that I won't be done with Fallout 3 and Final Fantasy XIII by then; not given how obsessive compulsive I am when it comes to completing RPGs. However, I am going to accept a Herculean challenge and try to beat BioShock 2, Darksiders, The Saboteur, Assassin's Creed II, Red Faction: Guerilla, GRAW, Gears of War (on at least one difficulty setting), Crackdown, Star Wars: TFU, Aliens vs Predator (in campaign), and complete my achievement hunting... and finish at least one of my XBLA games in two months. On average, more than one game finished each week. It may not sound tremendously difficult, but given how hard it has been for me to find time to play lately, I think it could be.

And now that Bad Company 2 is joining the fray, it'll be hard enough to pull away from the online playground and focus on single player campaigns...

Nonetheless, I accept the challenge, to remind myself that I am a gamer. I do it for the good of my country, as my spending so much money on games has to stimulate the economy. And my forthcoming marathon sessions will stimulate it further with late night 7-Eleven and Taco Bell runs.

I have 62 days. 14 games.

Heaven or Hell. Let's rock.

Those of you who read my blog (I enjoy deluding myself) may have noticed the Italian from my first post was from the Inferno. Despite considerable trepidation, I bought Dante's Inferno and have been playing it, gradually getting closer and closer to the end (and debating when to go back and go achievement hunting). Despite the fact the game bears very little resemblance to the epic poem, something strange happened around the time I saw Cerberus was no longer a dog but a strange, three headed worm...thing. At that point, I abandoned all hope (see what I did there?) of the game being anything like the poem and something strange happened. I started having fun.

I'm a big fan of the God of War series, and Dante's Inferno stole from the best source material, creating nicely varied combat and some genuinely interesting monster designs. Though I kept having deja vu regarding God of War and Devil May Cry, this never really detracted from the experience. Rather, the comparisons actually enhanced the experience for me; I felt much the same about Darksiders, which may have stolen every single gameplay mechanic, but at least used them effectively with plot and setting. If the game were just called Inferno and not claiming to be in any way like the epic poem, I'd have enjoyed it even more than I do now, and seen the subtle references as just developers having fun, rather than any attempt at homage.

If you want to play a surprisingly deep hack and slasher with simple, adolescent wish fulfillment (read: boobies!), this is worth a look. Should at least hold you over until God of War III arrives. Christian mythology is certainly no less bloody than Greek mythology, and Dante's character flaws actually make him a more sympathetic protagonist than Kratos.

On another note, I love the game's use of cutscenes, especially the simple 2-D animation used for flashbacks. At first, jumping from high-res to in-game to comic felt jarring, but it grew on me quickly, and made the story that much more striking.

That said, if you've never read the Inferno, this game will probably be even more enjoyable. But even we clever college types can enjoy the sex and violence.

Yesterday, I experienced something truly astonishing. Should it come as any surprise it happened while I was playing Mass Effect 2, which has already claimed the lives of many of my brethren?

That said- SPOILERS AHEAD, SO...duck and cover? Or something. Uh...maybe you could... SPOILERS

I was deciding which of the love interests my sex-crazed Paragon would pursue, and who I'd be letting down. I knew early on it'd be a toss up between Miranda and Tali, and in the end, the Quarian won out. I went to let Miranda down easy, and something strange happened.

I've done some despicable things in video games, including previous Mass Effect 1 playthroughs. I destroyed, I betrayed, I cheated... but they were clouds of ones and zeroes. They didn't have feelings; they did not warrant pity. Yet, when I told Miranda things wouldn't work, I felt a sudden tug on my heart strings.

Miranda lowered her head for a brief pause. Her eyes lowered somewhat, and her lips trembled only briefly. And in that moment, I felt real, genuine sympathy, even before she allowed herself a sad reply.

Perhaps it was Bioware's brilliant motion capture. Perhaps it was Yvonne Strahovski (Miranda's voice actress; also her character model) wowing me with acting ability. Or maybe it was because I'd just finished her loyalty mission an hour or so beforehand, and Miranda's tragic history was still fresh in my mind. I understood her loneliness and her disappointment, and for a single moment, I empathized.

I felt guilty I'd even started pursuing a romantic relationship with her at all. I hadn't expected to feel like such a jerk, but all the pieces fit into place for me. Miranda's unique upbringing ensured no one else could ever understand her the way Shepard could, and now that relationship possibility was permanently dissolved.

I returned to normal shortly afterward, but the experience stuck with me. No game had ever achieved this feat in my adult years. The last time I felt genuine sympathy for a video game character was back in 2003's The Wind Waker when Ganondorf explained the tragedy that befell his kingdom and why he attacked Hyrule and seized the Triforce. For a moment, Bioware completely eroded the bitter, cynical indifference and exposed my heart.

I'm sure others have experienced similar reactions. While I was initially uninterested in many new cast members, they quickly grew on me and I started to relate to them. Legion, for example, despite having very few personal missions, has perhaps the most interesting backstory of any of the characters, and Tali's loyalty mission made it clear to me that she was the character I'd wanted to pursue a romance with, strange accent and all. Mordin, of course, sings Gilbert and Sullivan, and really, I don't think I'll ever laugh so hard at a video game again. The changes in your previous squadmates- especially Liara and Garrus- make the experience all the darker, and all the more relatable.

(WARNING: TOPIC SHIFT INCOMING; SPOILERS STILL IN EFFECT)

Speaking of Liara, I am to understand that being unfaithful to your love interest in Mass Effect 1 will have dire ramifications for Mass Effect 3. Well, Liara suddenly turned very cold on me, and Shepard was surrounded by attractive women with personal vulnerabilities only he could assist with, and it was incredibly difficult to not try and shack up with all of them. Maybe if I tell her I did it for the achievement she'll understand?

However, for those who recall a specific hidden scene in Mass Effect 1, it is possible for Shepard to suggest a threesome, and in Mass Effect 2, Shepard can resolve situations that arise between two crewmates with a high enough Paragon/Renegade score... and in my case, both Tali and Liara are aliens with unique cultures... Liara was neutral to the idea of a threesome in the first game and Tali believes in the importance of bonds and duty...

While I consider it a longshot, I can always hope...

Tali: Shepard... this is unorthodox to me, and I have my concerns about my health... but after all you've done for me, there isn't anything I'd be unwilling to do for you.

Liara: You gave me comfort when I needed it. When you needed me, I had to pursue my own agenda. Though it isn't how I expected things to turn out, I believe you are always sincere in your wishes.

Shepard: *Paragon option* I love you both. I don't care if no one else understands; we're more than just comrades. We've faced so much together... I want us to stay together, through whatever lies ahead. All of us.

*SUCCESS* Tali: You wouldn't say anything you don't mean.

*SUCCESS* Liara: Whatever your needs may be, Shepard, you've always attended to ours'. There's no reason we can't all be happy.


ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED- 100G: Two is Better Than One (Alternate Title: Oh, Hell Yes)
Successfully complete a relationship path with two teammates


The wait for Mass Effect 3 is going to be damn near impossible. But if this is the future, it's worth waiting for.

I am an author, fallen from grace. I have a tendency to speak in strange, cryptic tones and even people who know me find it hard to determine exactly what I mean when I say anything. Hence the title of this odd genesis.

Though I tend to define myself entirely as an author, and therefore prefer to have no identity or biography, I cannot deny the passage of time or the events of my life; thus certain attributes are clear. I enjoy video games, and I enjoy screwing around on the internet. Rooster Teeth is a natural fit.

As I invariably make journal entries, more and more of my personality will emerge. Including my tendency to shamelessly hawk my works (though you're in luck- it's all available for free on the internet anyway). That and I might stalk the odd Rooster Teeth staff member to mutter vague, cryptic musings that probably won't lead anywhere.

Probably.

As for the title of this entry, its meaning will eventually become clear, as I slowly unveil more details... and set my own grandiose acts of general eccentricity into motion.

I'll also occasionally show off with obscure references and then snicker to myself.

Caccianli i ciel per non esser men belli,
né lo profondo inferno li riceve,
ch'alcuna gloria i rei avrebber d'elli.