Hello everybody, and welcome to our final look at the series, Haiyoru! Nyarko-San. We've had some good times and some bad times, but everything does have to come to an end at some point. In this case, it's the series. Today we'll be looking at the last twelve available ONA episodes and see how the second season of ONAs compare to the first.
So, let's jump right into it and see how it all... er, started.
-Attention please! When watching this program, make sure you turn on the lights and don't sit too close to the screen. Also, the main feature is animated in flash and not in that pesky CGI or hand drawn crap. We have standards here!
-We start with a pan of a prototype Yasaka household, then start with Nyarko greeting a recently awakened Mahiro. I Note that there's a little more detail to the characters and background then there was the last time. Mahiro is surprised to see that Nyarko is up before her when she asks what he would like for breakfast. Or maybe he would like some of her sweets? *wink, wink, nudge, nudge*
-Mahiro questions why those are his only two choices, but Nyarko suddenly appears on screen, saying that everyone's disappointed. By everyone, she means the audience. They expected to see them in their moist forms, writhing around, but she starts to cry as she cannot say the words. Mahiro thinks it's a budget or production issue, but Nyarko screams for the fans of her show! What about them? And then she repeats it. She goes on to say that she wants to see Mahiro squirm out of his pajamas and show some skin. You know, for the fans! Mahiro thinks that doesn't make sense, so Nyarko will do the stripping, which is probably what the fans really wanted.
-That's when Kuko arrives, asking Nyarko to make a mess of her. Nyarko demands to know what this horny bitch is blathering about. No, really, she actually calls Kuko a "horny bitch." Mahiro says "Pot, meet kettle", but Kuko, who tends to be in her own little world some of the time, says that Mahiro can have breakfast while Nyarko eats her. As her eyes sparkle at such a thought, Nyarko delivers breakfast to Mahiro to get Kuko to stop talking. Said breakfast includes... actually, it's a rather normal looking breakfast. Mahiro is shocked by this as Nyarko explains that she woke up really early that morning to make it. Shocking, right?
-As we see Shanta-kun flying in the background, Nyarko wants Mahiro to try out her sausage. The food, that is. But before he can, it's Shanta-kun who eats it, with a scene of her on the ground in ecstasy. No, really, it actually says that on screen. Mahiro and Nyarko stare at her for a moment before he suddenly accuses her of putting something in the sausages. Nyarko looks away, with words saying she doesn't know, but then we cut to Kuko and... wait, who are you? Are you suppose to be Yoriko? Anyway, they had some of Nyarko's sausage and find that they're quite delicious. Wait, were you that lady from the second season OVA?
-Suddenly, in space, the Vogons have come to demolish Earth to make way for a Hyperspace bypass, with a caption saying "seventy days before the end of humanity." We then cut to our opening, which starts with a spinning silver fork of doomy doom, then to the song proper, with a very well animated Nyarko, posing, then of Kuko, doing the same. Though her typical red outfit is in black here. Then we have mysterious woman in the black kimono, then another silver haired maiden in probably the ugliest yellow sweater I've ever seen, then Nyarko hugging Mahiro from behind, then doing a back to back pose with him. The camera then pans up to our series title, Naiyoru! Nyaruani: Remember My Mr. Lovecraft.
-We then see Nyarko standing at a door, looking like she wants to say something. Then Kuko inside of a classroom, looking sullen and said. Then of Kimono Lady with her umbrella, walking in a garden. Then that other silver haired maiden in a park. Then back to Nyarko, who looks very happy. We transition to Nyarko and Mahiro running together, joining hands, then Kuko appearing, doing some posing with her fires, then Kimono lady bowing to the screen. Shanta-kun appears, then the second silver haired maiden with a baseball bat, taking a big swing. I think she struck out.
-Next we have Mahiro and Nyarko riding a bike together, both smiles, with Nyarko getting her hugs on. Then we're back back in space as the silver fork spins, before falling into earth as our ladies pose for the camera one more time.
-I should note that the entire opening... or I guess we can call it the closing credits, took up about a fourth of the episode's runtime, which was about four minutes long. We then cut to an after credit scene, one in real life, as we see these two ladies in pink dresses standing around as a CGI Shanta-kun flies around. Nyarko narrates, saying to Mahiro that the city's full of Christmas spirit, with Mahiro asking why she's taking off her clothes? She was hoping it would get him hot, so she brought a Santa costume. Apparently, he isn't big into sexy Santa costumes and plans to have Kuko incinerate it later. All this and more in our next episode, Endless Christmas. But don't worry about the costume, Nyarko is going to keep trying, even if Mahiro doesn't want her to.
-Oh, I should mention that this episode was titled Because I'm Not a Person.
-No waiting around as we get into our second episode. Please keep away from the screen unless you want to go blind. Anyway, mysterious kimono woman? Her name is Atoko and Nyarko knows her. Turns out, Atoko is her former high school classmate, and introduces herself properly and where she's from, which is Atlach-Nacha. Mahiro comments that, while her name is as silly as everybody else, she seems a lot more mature than a silver silver haired maiden he knows. And we see Shanta-kun is busy eating carrots, because it's what she does in these shorts.
-Anyway, Nyarko tells Mahiro not to be deceived by Atoko, for she is a lecherous tease! Wow, what strong language, says Mahiro, despite Nyarko calling Kuko a horny bitch in the previous episode. Anyway, to prove her point, Nyarko asks Atoko what her favorite idiom is. It's Adult video idol, she says. Well, looks like Nyarko was right on this one. But she isn't going to let this go, calling Atoko a pervert, but then introduces Mahiro to her, adding that she promised her future to him. Mahiro demands to know when this promise was made! He doesn't remember making any sort of promise! Lies, all of it!
-But Atoko, keeping her mature demeanor, bows to Mahiro. He doesn't know how to take it but greets her warmly. By the by, why did Atoko come to Earth? And why is there a face on Shanta-kun's head? Anyway, Atoko is here because Nyarko summoned her for an important mission. Whatever that mission was, Nyarko tells her to not bring it up, then tells Mahiro to ignore her. Mahiro doesn't like where this conversation is going. Atoko takes it in a stranger direction, offering to bate and accompany him at night if he lets her stay. Nyarko refuses, because she's only gotten to third base! Mahiro tells her to stop making up lies again.
-Atoko is upset about this, since it seems that Mahiro doesn't want a midnight companion. Though according to the text, it's actually a midnight snack. But we're playing with the word play joke here, so Nyarko tells her, no, not needed, go away! Mahiro is the one that should be saying that! Atoko agrees with him, but even he questions that and tells her to stick with the conversation. Nyarko uses this to claim that Mahiro said she can be his midnight companion. Again, Mahiro calls her out on her terrible lies. What's with all the lying?
-That's when Kuko appears, in her typical civilian outfit. Atoko stares at her and calls her cute and offers to take a bath with her. Mahiro asks if he can punch her, with Nyarko granting full permission. We then see that the Vorgons are still on their way to earth, as humankind only has sixty three days left until it's end. Well, that sounds like fun.
-You know, these end credits clearly took up the small budget this set of shorts have. Though honestly, they look really, really pretty. But we go right to the end to see some buildings under construction as CGI Shanta-kun spins and spins. Our narrator talks about a searing heat that never seems to relent, that a place between this world and another dimension, where even moving forward is difficult. To some, it is called utopia. Otherwise call it a battlefield. Leave me and go, but I cannot leave you, because I'll get lost! Yeah, that's all kinds of confusion. Somebody take that script away from Atoko (I think). All this and more in our next episode, To The Market. Mahiro then questions way she came to Earth anyway?
-Remember to stay away from the screen lest the tentacles reach out and take hold of your eyes. We start with Atoko and Kuko enjoying a nice walk in the dusk of evening. This is when Atoko asks Kuko if she's in love with Nyarko, which she confirms. She then ask Kuko if she... uh, wow. It was so bad they had to censor the flash animation. It probably has something to do with kangaroos.
-Kuko gets embarrassed, then Atoko asks something, once again censored, to the point that even Kuko is stunned into silence. And if you can get Kuko like that, then you must be talking about some very dirty stuff. Like dust! And coffee stains! Atoko apologizes for being intrusive, but when she sees her, she likes to... huh, more censoring. Probably something about the early exit of the Cowboys this season. Kuko gets embarrassed. I never took her for a Dallas fan.
-We have a card show up real quick, saying that, despite how Kuko usually acts, she was embarrassed for some reason. Probably because of her boys losing against the Packers. But enough talk about football, let's talk about something else.
-Nyarko shows up, telling Mahiro that a friend of her's came over to play. Hey, it's that other silver haired maiden with the yellow sweater. Her name is Nyarue and... why is she flinging her baseball bat around? Oh, and she's also a former high school classmate of Nyarko's. Mahiro then introduces himself to her, but then thinks about everybody else and comments that he seems to be a magnet for aliens as of late, but Nyarko appears to be insulted by this. Still, with ah huge smile, he welcomes Nyarue to his home.
-And just like that, Nyarue has fallen under Mahiro's spell. And Nyarko has a rival to contend with, and unlike the other rival, this one is a lady... maybe. Still, Nyarue wonders if it's alright for her to fall in love with Mahiro, but he's more concerned about the bat she's holding. Nyarko explains that Nyarue is really athletic, but that's just how she is, so don't worry too much about it, okay? For her friend has her own world, with other text calling her cute. Sure, until she accidentally breaks something with that bat of hers. Then I bet she'll run off without offering to pay for the damages. Stupid kids and their baseball.
-Nyarue then chimes in, saying that she is what she is, but would Mahiro accept an alien? As she tries to confess, the stress gets so badly that she spins around before transforming into... something that even flash animation can show. Mahiro, who's taking this rather well, asks Nyarko if this "thing" that took Nyarue's place is combustible or noncombustible. Nyarko, taking the question seriously, thinks that they can't burn that.
-Meanwhile, those Volgans are still coming, with only fifty-six days left until the end of humankind. They sure are taking their sweet time, aren't they?
-We get a short next episode preview. Shanta-kun is still spinning around as Kuko starts to give us the next episode title, but Nyarko chimes in, giving us the title of Mahiro's Very First Naked Apron. And then she gets stabbed off screen. Only took us three episodes to get to that point, didn't it?
-Before we move on to the next episode, I want to talk about the bleep gags here. I'm reminding of an episode of Sealab 2021, where part of the episode had a boat captain, who got bleeped out quite a bit in that episode. It's revealed that, while there were mandatory bleeping involved, the creators added more, just to add to the comedy. I wonder if that was the case for Atoko here?
-I should note that the episode is listed here as [i]Mahiro, My First Naked Apron!" Also, do not trying to get close to the screen to try and get a look, or else the gnomes behind the screen still suck out your eyes.
-We cut to Atoko and Nyarko on an elevator. They are very silent. Still going down.. Still silent. After close to twenty seconds of silence, Atoko breaks it, saying that if Nyarko opens her heart, there is no longer any need to remove your clothes. Uh... okay? Even Nyarko is confused about this comment. But we don't get a response as we cut to the Yasaka household. Mahiro is going to feed a goldfish, but to make conversation, asks Kuko what she's playing. Why, the Wonder Swan, of course! You remember that thing, right? ...Right?
-When Mahiro comments on how old the system looks, Kuko responds that swans appear elegant above the water, but they're frantically paddling their feet below the surface. Then a picture of a Fender Jazz Base (?) appears because... why not? Mahiro gives a noncommittal response as Kuko continues, saying the something may appear smart, but be very sophisticated on the inside. And we have a picture of the Virtual Boy because... shut up and accept it! Oh, and apparently the Wonder Swan will record your blood type, too. Because it's important for a game to know your blood type. I don't know why, but it is very important.
-Moving on from that, Mahiro asks Kuko if she did something to the goldfish. What goldfish? The one in the bowl in front of you. Did you feed him something? His food. What food? From the store. And where was this store!? The store in space, obviously. Mahiro is angry and doesn't want to hear anymore. Kuko, however, finds something impossible. The goldfish's body is red! But that isn't what Mahiro is talking about. What he's talking about is that the goldfish has legs. And they're quite hairy, too. Kuko, missing the implication of the comment, asks if goldfish have legs? This is clearly why Mahiro is yelling and asks how did this happen? Kuko has no idea what's going on at this point, so Mahiro decides to give up on it.
-Meanwhile, the Volgons are still approaching Earth, with the countdown to the end of days at forty nine. But we don't go right to the credits. Nyarko and Mahiro appear, with our silver haired alien saying that everything knew it was wrong, but because they asked such an important figure, they couldn't say so. Mahiro adds that everyone is happy with the result, so who cares? Wait, what was that all about?
-Long preview this time. We see Shanta-kun spinning over a grill as Nyarko wishes us a Happy New Year. She asks about our New Year's, if we ate good things and made plans for the coming year. She plans to go on a hot spring date with Mahiro. Though Kuko, Atoko and Nyarue will have to go with them though, but she can't see what's in front of her through all the nose blood and sweat. All this and more in our next episode, Nyarko and Mahiro's Lovey Dovey Steamy Hot Springs Vacation. Don't miss it!
-We start with our warning, which does change in each episode. In this one, it warns that there won't be much movement here. So the characters are feeling lazy, are they? How dare they! In the episode proper, we see Shanta-kun in one of those buckets as Nyarko explains how great the hot springs are. Atoko agrees, saying the outdoor baths feel so wonderful. Nyarko explains that, typically, in late night anime, they have hot springs of bath scenes, and breaking the fourth wall a bit, she knows the audience has been waiting for this. FYI, the camera is still on Shanta-kun at this point.
-Nyarko explains that, apparently, they have the play all to themselves. Kuko notes that it's so quiet, which Nyarko agrees with. Then she notices that Nyarue has grown up quite a bit since she last saw her, then starts feeling her up. Nyarue tries to get her to stop as Kuko complains about not having anything for Nyarko to grab. I'm sure she's talking about lemons or something. Atoko says it's fine and offers to go to the other end with her, but she'd rather have Nyarko instead. However, it's pointed out that Nyarko wants nothing to do with Kuko as we hear more loud noises off screen. Because yes, we're still on Shanta-kun.
-Also, what was that red ball that appeared in Shanta-kun's bath? It disappears just as quickly. Nyarko tells Kuko to get off her, but apparently our fiery red-head wants to stay with her forever. Atoko, however, things they should feel guilty for deceiving innocent bystanders. Nyarue then asks about Mahiro and if he's by himself in the men's bath. Nyarko calls out and asks him to join them, citing that their skin is all tight and soft. Nah, he's fine where he is.
-Back to the debauchery at hand. Kuko declares her love for Nyarko, but she'd rather not have Kuko getting all horny on her back. But it's too late! She's already overflowing. Probably talking about the soap. But then Kuko decides to use that extra soap to wash Nyarko, but she tells the fiery redhead to stop, because it's dangerous. Well, she is hot, after all. As in her body temperature is always high. Atoko, witnessing this, says that a bath is a life decision, then turns her attention to Nyarue, who doesn't appreciate all the touching there. She's probably touching her silky, silky hair.
-Meanwhile, Shanta-kun continues to enjoy her bath, which we've seen her do this entire episode. Actually, we've seen nobody else but her, and she's fine with that.
-Meanwhile, in space, the Volgons, who see hot springs as a waste of time, continue their approach to Earth. In a mere forty-two days, the world is doomed.
-For the next episode preview, we have spinning Shanta-kun spinning at... an orange tower, maybe? Atoko is narrating, saying the days are still cold, but asks how everybody else is doing. She mentions that she took a walk that morning and saw the buds of the neighborhood plums had grown. She then says that he'd like to enjoy the flowers someday, but that will have to wait until after our next episode, Buried Alive. What a scary title.
-Next, we have our warning! Don't get too close, because the characters move this time, so you might get run over. We start things proper with Kuko shopping! She's looking at a scarf and imaging herself with Nyarko, because that's her thing. We suddenly cut to Mahiro asking Nyarko where Kuko is. Apparently, she's starting work that day. Mahiro is surprised by this, but Nyarko finds it laughable that the perverted woman is actually working. Mahiro comments that she should find work, too, despite being in the PDO. But Nyarko has the perfect response to that. Working is losing! Indeed... except for needing money to buy goods and other products necessary to stay alive.
-And then we jump to Lobon Station, where we hear a chime. Kuko welcomes the person and we see she's working as a cashier in a convenience store. She's ringing up a lady, who's buying some food, and Kuko asks if she wants to have it heated up. When the lady agrees, Kuko goes all red and accidentally causes and explosion. I don't think your union is protecting you from that.
-So we cut to Kuko working at a fast food joint. She's inputting an order and dealing with a troublesome customer who keeps changing her order. Kuko is feeling overloaded, and as somebody who used to work in fast food, I can perfectly understand. Stupid customer. They are not always right! Oh, yeah, Kuko asks if the customer wants hot or iced coffee? Hot... no, wait, she wants orange juice instead. The order continues and Kuko looks like she's on the verge of tears, but she gets so frustrated with this lady that she causes another explosion. In the pan out shot of the explosion we can see the smoke coming from the first explosion. That's a nice little detail, but man, who knew that Kuko could get another job so quickly?
-After the second explosion incident, we see that Kuko is now working at a gas station. Mahiro immediately puts an end to that at once for some very obvious and concerning reasons. Seriously, Kuko, did you not tell the owners about the other two explosions you caused? I'm sure that's a felony. With that, we cut to the Yasaka household as Nyarko asks about Kuko's work. She says that working is losing, all while she's busy knitting a scarf. When in doubt, just go with something simple.
-Meanwhile, those Volgons are still coming, and they're only thirty five days away from ending mankind. But then we get a cut of Nyarko, in the dusk of the afternoon sun, claiming that she is Cthulhu! Mahiro comments that she just remembered that, didn't she? Is this a joke from the first season?
-In our next episode preview, spinning Shanta-kun spins in front of a railroad signal. Mahiro is asking Nyarko what she's doing. She's organizing her pools from the market, which is something she really likes. After all, she has to make sure to check out all the doujin manga and novels! Mahiro then makes the terrible decision of asking Kuko what books she likes. Why, yurt-type doujin manga and novels, of course! Of course she would. And what about Atoko? Dan Oniroku, supposedly. Yeah, I don't want to know about that one. All this and more in our next episode, Mushroom Master. Sounds like a cooking episode.
-Look, we told you guys not to get so close to the screen, and because you did, one of you jerks broke the drawing tablet! Thanks a lot for that! We start the episode with Atoko asking Mahiro if he's good with my computers? Note that this isn't a translation error because Mahiro asks what my computers are. Perhaps she means personal computers? But she doesn't comment on that. Instead, she would like to see a website she found yesterday, but she can't find it anymore. That's what search engines are for. Oh, and it'll be in her history, too, so Mahiro will check that out for her. But, of course, her desktop has a picture of her, naked, adorning the screen. But he moves on from that. He clicks on an icon with lips and hears, and out comes a moaning sound. Lady, you are free to have whatever crazy games you want, but make sure the sound is lowered for that, okay?
-Atoko asks Mahiro if he knows what he's doing, and suddenly he feels like he's being tested. He tries to calm himself down as he clicks on another icon. it is a blue square with Eh on it. A voice says Photo Retouching Software. So, basically Photoshop. Next icon above that is Notebook, then the one above that is the Browser. One would think he'd go into that first, but then again, aliens.
-After opening it up, Mahiro asks Atoko if she remembers the name of the website? Nope, so you better check that history, but given who's history you're checking, you might want to prepare yourself for the worse. So what was in the site? It had dogs. That sounds relatively normal. As Mahiro goes through her history, he starts questioning it, but really, you should stop that. Though he's concerned with how often she's visiting sites. It's apparently a hundred sites in a minute. She must be opening up a lot of tabs. That runs hell on your RAM, Atoko.
-Atoko is looking over the list as well and wonders which one it was, with Mahiro looking at the websites and find that they're all pornographic sounding. He suspects that she did this on purpose and truly believes he's being tested. Because he wants this done today, he asks her if there are any more clues she can give him. Nope, she's tapped out. Thirty minutes later, Mahiro is going through various dog sites, displaying them to her. D'aw, what a cute retriever! But it's not it. An hour later, another dog site, but it's not it. But almost. Almost!? Two hours later, and we find this cute little dog, and that's the one she was looking for. Atoko then thanks Mahiro for his help, but he's just confused by this. What it really a test?
-Meanwhile, those Volgons, who do not like cute dogs, are still on their way to Earth. T-minus twenty eight days until the end of everything. And then we have Nyarko, Mahiro, and Atoko, all in 3D! As in you need the red and blue glasses. Mahiro understands why, but they're done up in the old style. It's also hell on the eyes, too.
-Our preview has Shanta-kun back on the streets as a lady in a pink dress is greeting people. Kuko is our narrator today, giving us our horoscope. Pisces, this week you'll be surrounded by a thousand baby goats and feel at peace. Sounds like the perfect life of a goat farmer. Your lucky color is one from another dimension. It's probably tang. And your lucky item is an unidentifiable object that looks like a floor cushion. So you should watch the next episode, titled Content Undecided. Why wasn't it decided yet? As for the horoscope, we move on to Taurus, and you guys are in for a hell of a week.
-Our warning warns the audience that the people doing the warnings are tired of their warnings being ignored. Their SAN is nearly depleted and wants you all to stop ignoring them! I should also note that this episode is listed as Content to Be Decided. The episode begins with Nyarue, who we haven't seen on screen in a while. She's apologizing and is ready to offer and excuse, but assumes said person isn't interested in hearing any of her excuses, so of course they don't have to listen, but she would like it if Mahiro would listen. Yeah, she's talking to Mahiro, who's probably hoping that they don't have a repeat of her introduction episode.
-Nyarue explains that she was trying to protect Mahiro from the Nightgaunt since Nyarko and Atoko are gone, as the only ones here are herself and Mahiro. She gets some pretty dirty thoughts displayed on screen, showing an ulterior motive, but she will take her job of protecting Mahiro seriously. Especially from Nightguants. Why? Because Mahiro is an important person. But don't get the wrong idea, she just means that he's important to Nyarko, and he's important to Nyarue, as well. But she's not saying it because she's not interested in him, or that she doesn't think he's attractive. After a pause, she looks embarrassed and asks Mahiro to forget that last part. Too late, for we have it on tape and it already has a thousand views.
-Nyarue, depressed that she's rambling, believes that something is wrong with her today. She explains that she's been numerous since things have been so crazy lately. She hasn't been sleeping well, or maybe she's stupid for thinking that she's getting enough sleep. First, you're not stupid. Second, you can never get enough sleep. As she explains that she's been out of it, she allowed a Nightgaunt to come in. Then she explains that she was half asleep and that there was no Nightgaunt. What did she see? Herself in the mirror. And we get a picture of herself in the mirror, showing off part of the form we saw in her introduction episode.
-And Nyarue starts packing again and swinging that baseball bat around, panicking about her and Mahiro. Mahiro, who has been listening patiently this whole time, just asks her to put everything back where it was. But then Nyarue transforms and we find that she and Mahiro are in public, him on the toilet, surrounded by people. I told you Taurus was in for a hell of a week... wait, is Mahiro a Taurus?
-You know who isn't a Taurus? Volgons. And they're still making their way for Earth to end humanity in twenty one days. Why wait? Because the demolition date is in twenty one days and we are going to follow the schedule, dammit!
-In our preview, we have spinning Shanta-kuns in the corners while we rock this joint with a lady rocker. Nyarko wishes us a good morning and cuts right to the next episode title, which is When a Threat Comes to Destroy the Milky Way, The Level of Foreboding is Too Much for the Mere High School Student Mahiro, for Whom There is NO Guarantee that Tomorrow's Sun Will Rise at the Same Angle, Speed, Tracing the Same Path, Nor with the Same Radiance, and in the Moment He Feels the Vague Anxiety of All This, How Will He Let Go of Emotions, Stop Worrying, and Love the Girl? Wow, long title.
-Warning, because there are three episodes left, we had Mr. Manta write this one. Don't blame us for any loss of SAN. Also, the episode title is listed as How He Came to Love the Girl Despite Being a Normal High School Student Who Cannot Even Sense in the Slightest That the Universe is at Risk of Destruction, and Suppresses a Vague Worry That Tomorrow the Sun May Not Rise from the Same Direction or at the S.... So, yeah, the title was so long, it broke Crunchyroll's limit.
-In the episode proper, we see Mahiro in a suit of armor, as well as his stats. He's level six, has seven HP, a ton of MP, six hundred and seventy seven gold and a thousand and twenty four points of experience. Must be hurting really badly or poured all of his points into the wrong stat. I bet he only knows one spell, too. I do note that his weapon is a giant silver fork of doomy doom.
-Mahiro demands to know how this happen, so we cut to one hour earlier, where Nyarko asks him if he wants to play an RPG that looks like Final Fantasy XIII but really isn't. It's called Final Fantasista XIII. Totally different game. Turns out, Atoko got this game. An RPG, Mahiro asks? Why, yes. Atoko says it's a virtual... something that allows you to experience the world of the game. So why bring up a Virtual Boy? Perhaps she's talking about virtual reality? Well, it's not like Atoko understands what these damn kids are into these days, with the low riding jeans and the boots with the fur.
-Nyarko wants to give it a try, since Mahiro likes RPGs, right? He's not against it, and thinks that maybe it's a 3D RPG. He's certain he has those glasses somewhere. So he checks it out, and soon we find him in the game proper. He didn't think this would happen, but here we are. I also see he's been in battle recently and lost some health. Honestly, I hope he isn't playing a Souls game, because that means lots and lots of dying. Also, I hope this isn't like Sword Art Online where death in the game means death in real life.
-Oh, and it turns out that, despite having a ton of MP, Mahiro can't use magic. Who created this character, anyway? And suddenly we have a monster... wearing a virtual head set, carrying roses and a wedding ring. What to do? That's when the monster asks if Mahiro desires power. No, wait, it's not a monster. It's a voice inside of Mahiro's own head. Oh, he's in Persona? That's only slightly better than being in a Souls game. He wonders if this is an awakening event and bets he'll learn a special move or spell, which is why his MP is so needlessly high. In that case, he does desire power!
-Then the voice changes as a light shines upon Mahiro, saying that he shall receive it. And he gets hit in the head with a potion. It's an Elixir. Nope, he's in a Soulsgame after all, as all he gets is an item. One hour later, Mahiro found his way out and tells the two that he's never playing any game they bring ever again.
-As for the Volgons, they don't like games, which is part of the reason why they want to destroy humanity, which will happen in fourteen days. The paperwork says so, after all.
-As for our preview, Shanta-kun is spinning in front of a lady sitting on a bench as the girls get in on the fun. Nyarko mentions something about Kyushu as Atoko, I think, says they didn't come here on vacation, but Nyarko understands that. Nyarue then mentions that Kuko ended up in a marathon, somehow, but it's not what it seems to be. But don't worry, Kuko will crush this race. But what are those strange figures ganging up on Kuko? Amidst the sweat and the throb of excitement in her bones, can Kuko cross the finish line in the allotted broadcast time? Probably not. All this and more in our next episode, Content Undecided. Wait, again? But didn't you describe it in the preview?
-Listen, guys. Because you were too close to the screen last time, we couldn't decide on the content for this episode. So back up so we can decide on the content. Oh, and we have two episodes to go, with this one being done in flash.
-We start with a newscast explaining that people are going missing all over the nation. The investigation diligently continues as we see Mahiro in the kitchen, preparing dinner. Mahiro mentions that things have been going crazy lately. Well, more so than usual. That's when Nyarko comes in, noting that they're having a hot pot that night. Well, it has been cold lately, so something warm is nice. Kuko comes in and asks about it. Mahiro says it'll be done soon, so go get Atoko and Nyarue, okay? And while your at it, do something about the UFOs and monsters in the background. Thanks.
-After Kuko leaves, Nyarko comments on the high density population of aliens in the household as of late. Mahiro blames her for all this since all three know her personally. Nyarko argues that they're all drawn to this place, because Mahiro is such a chick magnet. Or weirdness magnet. Or both. Take your pick. Nyarue and Atoko soon pop in, happy to see that they're having hot pot for dinner. After all, tomorrow is the big day so they have to eat a lot. Mahiro questions about this foreshadowing and where it came from. So that's when he first got that power. Atoko is a little more reasonable, saying that winter is for hot pot, adding that men and women snuggle up with each other around one pot. This causes her chest to tingle, which is almost never a good thing.
-Mahiro, apparently wanting to make it worst, asks Atoko why aliens would gather around a pot? Also, there's a lot of other things wrong with what she's saying. Kuko suddenly appears on screen and begins to stir the pot, prompt Mahiro to yell at her. She response that stirring brings out the flavor. That's when Nyarko tells her to move out of the way as she prepares to insert another ingredient, using her skill called Ingredient Insert. We get a dictionary definition of it as Nyarko throws in a creature that looks like Nyarue when she's stressed out. During the white fade, Mahiro punched Nyarko and is upset that they have a mystery hot pot. Nyarko apologizes for her poor impulse control, but that doesn't matter as we hear a weird sound from outside. Oh lord, are the wheel bearings failing again?
-Nope, it appears that the Vogons have finally arrived, landing in town. I hope they have the proper paperwork for that, but it is the Volgons, so they probably did that, in triplicate. Oh, and the end of humankind is imminent. Fun times ahead! In our next episode preview, we have Shanta-kun on the streets, investigating the landing Volgons. OH, and we have a pretty lady in what appears to be in a maid outfit sitting on a bench. Kuko acts as our narrator, saying that the spaceship arrived suddenly. Then comments on the missing human beings. She adds that Nyarko and her friends are ready to fight, then that Nyarko and Mahiro's feelings become one. All this and more in our final episode, Remember My Love.
-This is what happens when you ignore the warnings, people! Alien spaceships come to Earth to bring about the end of Humankind. This is all your fault! All of you! And that's why this is the final episode.
-We start things off with the Volgon ship getting news coverage as helicopters fly around it. The area is in panic, people the news lady tells people not to approach the crash site. Yeah, if they weren't going to listen to the warnings before, they certainly won't listen to that. Mahiro and Nyarko face one another in the remains of his house as he asks if this has anything to do with the mission Atoko mentioned back in her introduction episode. Nyarko confirms this, and that she's going out to fight. Mahiro asks to come, but unfortunately, he cannot help them here. What a change from the regular season, where they drag him everywhere against his will.
-In any case, Mahiro, you stay here and wait for Nyarko's return, okay? Mahiro agrees and asks if she'll be all right. She tells him not to worry as the PDO will take care of it, so it'll be fine. Besides, when it's finally over, she'll erase everyone's memory with a not-neuralizer that she didn't not borrow from a secret organization. Also, don't allude to anything that might get them sued, okay? Kuko goes off ahead, so Nyarko says that, when she comes home, let's go have some fun together, okay? Mahiro tells her not to set off flags like that, because that means she's definitely not coming back. Mahiro is really worried now and asks if she'll come back, but suddenly, hugs! Oh, we're just making this worse, aren't we?
-Nyarko apologies to Mahiro and asks to stay like that for a while. She promises to return, so when she does, let her get her hugs on again, okay? Okay. He'll be waiting, so she has to come home. With those words, Nyarko feels fully charge and can totally fight now. The others are waiting, so she has to go. She promises she'll come home, so wait for her, okay? She then declares her love and... cue those credits! What a cliffhanger! Seriously, that's the ending. No next episode preview or anything.
-Luckily, we have another episode. Please, please listen to this warning about getting too close to the screen. Oh, and thanks for the purchase, so here's a bonus episode for you guys. It's also a longer episode. The previous episodes for this season have been four minutes. This one clocks in at five minutes and thirty-six seconds.
-We start this episode in the Yasaka household. Mahiro is alone and has a lot of boxes around him. He worries about Nyarko and wonders when she'll come home. Suddenly, the door chimes and Nyarko enters, happy to be home but exhausted. The others soon join her, all happy to be home. Mahiro is confused and demands an explanation, so after a wipe, we learn of Space Comiket. Nyarue says it's a bad copy of Japan's Comiket, but they've got big plans for it, though. Those missing people? the PDO abducted them to have people wait in line for limited edition figures. Though after that, everyone's memory has been erased, so nobody has to worry. Except for those people that suddenly have a new figure and have no idea where it came from. Was it on order from Amazon?
-Mahiro understands, then it clicks on him that they borrowed these people for the sake of their hobby. Don't worry, it wasn't actually like that. The planet was in danger, seriously. If Nyarko didn't get four limited edition figures, the world would have been destroyed. Man, those Volgons are sticklers for meeting their budget.
-Nyarko goes on to explain that the figures enclosed the Earth in an equilateral triangle barrier and protected humankind from the impending Cascade Shower. Mahiro presents on of the figures, which is listed as Bishojo, and asks Nyarko who she had to use figures? She has no idea why. All she knows is the space resin casts used to make those figures happened to contain the sweat of sculptors, which allowed them to create a barrier. But those sculptors are so popular in space, so getting those figures weren't easy. Long story short, Nyarko and company went to Comiket to buy figures to save the world. It was a real battle, though. But then what about the Volgon ship that crashed near his house? Turns out, it was a bus made by Harumi. Who would have Volgons drive a space bus to begin with?
-Mahiro, however, is really pissed. Turns out the reason he had to stay home was because Nyarko and company couldn't carry everything they bought back from space, so they shipped it by Space Delivery, and they needed Mahiro to receive it. Hence the boxes. Space Delivery covers a large area, so if you miss your delivery, it'll be a long time before they come again. Like UPS. Mahiro, still furious, wants to know why this wasn't explained to him? Nyarko is genuinely confused. She thought this was already explained to him. She thought Nyarue or Atoko explained it to him already. Nope, neither of them did. Poor communication and all that.
-Still, the battles! Nyarko says that they got into fights when the lines fell apart, the escalators stopped, they got split up, Nyarue got dehydrated, and Kuko and Atoko got surrounded by amateur photographers. So why wasn't Mahiro's memory erased as well? Well, that's because he made a promise to her to hold her when she came home. So the erasure was going to happen after that. Well, before that happens, there will be lots of stabbings by Mahiro's silver forks of doomy doom. No hugs for Nyarko. And we cut to space, where Nyarko's screams could be heard, as a magical girl angel floats by, with text telling us that, yes, this is the last episode.
-But wait, we're not done yet! We have an after credit scene. As Shanta-kun spins in front of a bridge, Nyarko asks for everybody's opinion of the series? Mahiro thinks it'll get worse than uploaded images of broken DVDs. Nyarko is shocked by that, because everybody loves them. So she wants a kiss, but it's a terrible punchline, according to Mahiro. Must be a wordplay thing. Apparently they said it in the next episode preview back in episode two, with Atoko appearing, saying she had plenty of fun. Mahiro asks what fun, with Kuko asking to meet again soon. Poor Mahiro is getting a headache.
-After a fade to black, we get that classic dusk shot of Nyarko and Mahiro. Nyarko explains that, after the TV anime comes the movie, so let's make it like Roman Porno! Mahiro tells her to stop making their niche audience even more limited. And we fade to black once more, but that is the absolute end there.
And there we have it, the two seasons of ONA episodes before the series proper. I'll give my full thoughts in the series review next week, but I will say that I think Nyarue was my favorite and wished she appeared in the main series proper. I kind of wish Atoko showed up, as well, but again, all of my final thoughts will happen next week.
I think to thank you all for reading this very long entry. I know it's longer than usual, but hey, I had twelve shorts to get through.
Until next time, remember, when you need to go to Space Comiket, make sure your Space Bus doesn't park in a populated area. It's always cheaper to land in non-populated areas, just to avoid the hassle of lawsuits.