DasDesertFox

Male
from Big Rapids, MI

  • Activity

    • Cinematographized

      6 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      The new RvB episode...fantastic. Standing ovation for RT.

    • Why don't we get drunk and screw?

      6 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      Really, I want some legitimate reasons.

    • Well Hot Damn!

      6 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      It's been a crazy couple of years since I last snooped around on here, but I suppose it's time I jumped back in the mess.
      What's shakin', bacon?

    • Good Juju

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      So, KUFan61 had an excellent idea--apply the pay-it-forward principles to your journal. The first 6 people to comment will get 3 mods from me; all you have to do is continue the idea in your own journal. Pretty sweet, huh? Don't even bother asking yourself that question, because I'll answer for you. Yes, it is pretty sweet. Get the karma a-churnin' and whatnot.

    • Pong: The Backstory

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      I wrote a backstory to the classic arcade game PONG, because I believe that this fantastic game should not have to go any longer without a plot. That, and I'm freaking awesome. Enjoy.

      One day, you are out walking around, and trying to chew gum at the same time. It isn't working out so well. "Darn," you think, "I wish I had better coordination." Suddenly, you happen upon a strange old hermit wearing the most unmatching array of rags you have ever laid eyes on. Even stranger, his mouth is completely filled up with what look to be white jawbreakers, and he is making a face that seems to suggest he was eating half-chewed rotten lemons covered in sunblock and Tabasco sauce, soaked in a fairly strong mixture of Drain-O, Crisco, and mercury, and wrapped in clean newspaper. That's what it looks like, anyway. This is quite puzzling to you, and though you wouldn't usually talk to someone as obviously crazy as he is, something beyond mere curiosity compells you to ask who he is and what he's doing. Just as the words are forming on your lips, however, he turns to you with a look as though he knew exactly what you were going to say. "These," he says (with considerable difficulty I might add, being that it is quite a challenge to pronounce one's S's with a mouth full of jawbreakers), "are the foulest, nastiest tasting jawbreakers ever known to man, and they never get any smaller." Naturally, you ask why on Earth he would ever want to put them in his mouth. He counters with a quick "That's what she said!" and begins his story. "I was once a great King, in a beautiful land far away from here. I had everything I could ever want, but I was lacking in one respect: good taste. I had many advisers who would try to tell me how to dress, but I never listened to them. Now, not a day goes by that I don't regret that decision." He pauses for a moment to compose himself, then continues. "One day while I was out walking, I came across a white brick in the middle of the road. It spoke to me, asking if I would be kind enough to put it back in it's place on the white wall next to the road. Instead of complying, I chose to mismatch it and put it on the black wall on the other side of the path. It put a curse on me right there." The man proceeds to talk in a ridiculously high falsetto, apparently attempting to imitate the brick's voice. "'As you have banished me, so will you be banished! For your transgression of bad taste, you will from this day forth experience what it is like to endure your mismatching socks, clashing colors, and ungodly combinations of vertical and horizontal stripes. You will forever taste the sensation of your own bad taste that you have so wrecklessly forced upon others!'" "Wow," you think to yourself, "I can't begin to fathom how bad bad taste would taste." You stop for a moment to consider whether that sentence makes sense, and finding it satisfactory, continue listening. "To this day I have been poor and friendless, banished from returning to my kingdom until I am free of this burden." This is of course the strangest story you have ever heard, but something tells you that this man is telling a very sad truth. You ask how you can help. "Well, whenever I try to spit one of these foul concoctions out, that white brick appears and hits it right back into my mouth--no matter how I try, I never seem to block it fast enough. If you would block them for me, I would be released from the curse and be able to return to my kingdom once more." Naturally, you want to look out for old #1, so you ask what's in it for you. "I'll be your best friend," he tells you. You say why not, because let's face it, who wouldn't want a King for their best friend? Besides, if you can do this, surely you'll be able to walk and chew gum at the same time. He counts down from 11 (you don't bother to ask why), spits out the first of the unsavory spheres, and the challenge ensues!

    • I'm back, I slack, get used to it!

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      I'm back...with a vengeance. Well, not really, but that expression is awesome, yes? Yes. I've been away on safari so long, but at long last I have returned. And pictures! Oh boy, do I have pictures. Please, feel free to look around, but don't touch anything! You break it, you buy it. So. Way too much has happened in my life to put any of it here now, but I'll fill y'all in as we go along. So eat, drink, and be merry; your fearless leader has returned! And if I wasn't your fearless leader before...fuck you. If you're not with me you're against me. Except for your mom; she was with me and I was against her...
      Long story short: (Your name here), I am your father, muahaha, join me on the dark side, blah blah blah, rule the universe, et cetera.
      Moving on!
      I have 100 modpoints...how shall I ever use them all, friends? Be creative.
      That is all for now. Cheers!
      --Fox

    • It's been a while...

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      Since I've really been on here. I've been checking up every now and again, but I haven't really done much more than that. Never fear, for I shall return! And when I get back...
      I currently have 95 mod points, and I feel selfish for having had them for so long. Comment with ideas on how/why I should get rid of them, and I'll choose my (and perhaps your?) fate when I get back on here in the Summer. Until then, tallyho!
      -Fox

    • Burn, Baby, Burn...Insult Inferno!

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      You won't get the title if you haven't heard the song. Anyway, I came up with what I consider to be a better than average paragraph of derision, and I'd like to share it with y'all!
      I think you're wrong about everything because your parents taught you wrong on purpose as a joke. Every moral you hold dear is the epitome of evil, and every fact of life that guides your judgement is complete and utter bullshit. Your meager existence is nothing but an elaborate sham, and the more you struggle to free yourself from the web of stupidity you have so adeptly woven around your hideously twisted and misshapen form, the closer you draw to the ultimate failure in life--unsuccessful suicide attempts. You are vile and disgusting, and I wish you would go drink Drain-O and play in traffic. You ride the short bus, and the rest of the tards call you a tard. If you were a country, even France could make you their bitch. If you were a city, it would be post-WWII Hiroshima. If you were a car, you'd be at the bottom of a lake. You smell like Satan took a crap, ate it, and took a crap again in a Port-O-Let in hell. Stone turns to stone when it looks at you, vomit vomits at the thought of you, and AIDS is afraid it will catch you.
      *Zing!*

    • I don't know...

      10 years ago

      DasDesertFox

      ...what the hell I'm doing. Just thought I'd share that.

  • About Me

    If you avoid drama and overboard political correctness, it don't matter who you are, we'll probably get along.
    One big thing about me is my love for music...I consider it to be a language of its own, and I've always got one song or another running through my head.
    I don't smoke much, but a good cigar goes very well with a good drink, and both go very well with an ocean breeze.
    Above all, I value honesty, inner beauty, and good times, so...word.

  • Comments (64)

    • Shaysie_fae

      9 years ago

      Wow, so i most definately havent been on in months and i wanted to say Hey! and sorry for the months of neglect lol.

    • Mortikie

      9 years ago

      Merry Christmas

    • Mortikie

      9 years ago

      Merry Christmas my good friend.

      PS Do you have AIM?

    • Oirazan

      10 years ago

      Hello friend,

      damonkie has started the second round of voting and I need your help. PLEASE vote for me so that I may be sponsored! This time I am giving away a mod to every person that votes for me as well as an additional mod point to everyone if I win. So go vote for you favorite Asian and be sure to tell all your friends! Thanks!

      -Dave c('.'c)

    • Oirazan

      10 years ago

      Vote for me on Monday, November 27 in damonkie's journal so he can sponsor me! Consider it a donation to the "Save the Dave" foundation! Thanks!

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      Make sure you tell because I don't want some random person that will just be eliminated in the first round

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      Contest smiley8.gifsmiley8.gif my journal smiley8.gifsmiley8.gif

    • jmbishop

      10 years ago

      rvb.roosterteeth.com/members/profile.php?uid=314511
      this guy is a loser he needs friends and comments

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      010114518354500.gif

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      hey buddy

    • kilroyzero

      10 years ago

      I like the pay it forward thing. how cool!

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      in two days youll get a prize

    • Oirazan

      10 years ago

      Haha, the sad thing is I thought the same thing about you when I first saw your posts. YAY for new friends! c(^.^c)

    • dolphinpoet

      10 years ago

      3:08 am
      good night!
      good boy for listening to ben folds
      he's fuckin amazing
      go see him whenever you have the opportunity.

    • dolphinpoet

      10 years ago

      OMG Winston-Salem??? Ben Folds grew up there! (Or very near there, my sister is more of a Ben-head than I am).
      You do know who Ben Folds is, don't you?

    • dolphinpoet

      10 years ago

      Hi, New Friend!
      A warning, because of where you live and what you could be exposed to...

      Don't ever work for CD Tradepost.
      Trust me - I used to work in their main office in Topeka, Kansas (I did a hell of a lot for a hell of a little).
      Actually, Steve is a good guy to work for (he basically runs all the stores down that way), but I'm just warning you... a very bad man runs the whole company.
      smiley1.gif

      Post edited 10/24/06 12:51AM

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      hey buddy
      schwhats up?

    • Jenza

      10 years ago

      You should totally go in for a shampoo ad. Your hair is nicer than MINE.

    • VocalDrummer

      10 years ago

      Word up yo... smiley0.gif

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      das
      read my journal and tell me that that isnt fucking gold!

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      hola amigo.

    • KUfan61

      10 years ago

      My word he is alive.

    • KingOfLemurs

      10 years ago

      awesome
      thanks for adding me.

    • buggybaby

      10 years ago

      And the writter is back

    • dontcryalone

      10 years ago

      lol.. yes i do

    • Mortikie

      10 years ago

      I knew you would like it.

    • Mortikie

      10 years ago

      Wooooo!! Your finaly back!

      Welcome Back!

    • Mortikie

      10 years ago

      You are safe from being deleted.

    • agp_ecko

      10 years ago

      man, youve just got the funniest shit in your pics, i gottas have you on my firends list, im sorry its random, but thats just too damn sweet

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      Your on smiley0.gif

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      cool im glad I din't get rid of you

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      Talk to me was up you don't comment anymore smiley2.gif and your never on, Ive got a contest

    • BlueArmyGurl

      10 years ago

      MOD CONTEST GO 2 MY JOURNAL

    • mrsphinx

      10 years ago

      thanks man :)

    • The3Blues FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      please vote for me here

    • mel

      10 years ago

      hmm...you are being added to the list... smiley8.gif

    • mel

      10 years ago

      zomg, u got skillz. smiley8.gif

    • mel

      10 years ago

      smiley12.gif to you sir. Many smiley12.gif s to you.

    • KUfan61

      10 years ago

      You win I think. smiley0.gif

    • Youngtusk87

      10 years ago

      Good disscussions in the Governemnt thread.

    • ewwitsnicole

      10 years ago

      hahhaha thanks for the hollar!
      Life is treating me okay i suppose, im just sick.
      How are you handsome??

    • Kagomai99

      10 years ago

      lol thanks...i think

    • holes

      10 years ago

      I love your avatar! :D

    • dontcryalone

      10 years ago

      well hey there

    • dontcryalone

      10 years ago

      yes.. i find it easier and better if i know what im gonna look like...lol

    • dontcryalone

      10 years ago

      hi.. love the pics..

    • Shadow_Nin

      10 years ago

      Welcome Back

    • Kagomai99

      10 years ago

      welcome back dude

    • Miz_KittKatt

      10 years ago

      Wewt! Hey, where were you? :P

  • Questions

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