1 year ago
I cant believe i remembered my password
3 years ago
Since turning 32 I've been thinking about my love life and realized that its been far to long since the last time I was in love. Not just caring, but totally out of my fucking mind in love.
I'm just looking for that one special woman, a who just grabs you, the woman that who separates you from your friends, not intentionally like a Yoko Ono kind of way but, just kind of like "Oh my god. This chick is fascinating, everything she says is amazing" So amazing you don't want to hang out with your friends, You would rather hang out with her.
So you end up pushing your friends over a bit. They can be "wanna go out for a bit?" And you are like "Nah man, I'm going to hang out with this chick, she is fucking awesome"
And she enlightens you, she teaches you things, and she is beautiful, and sexy, and fucks like a demon.
She is everything you dream about, and for some unknown fucking reason she is interested in you, She has turned the sun onto you. And you find that you don't ever want to let that go. Because once you have stood in the light of the sun, the reflection from the moon will never be as warm.
So you work hard to stay around that, and you love being around her. And you do things together.
She is the kind of chick that's like when you say "Hey, Wanna go to Zeffirelli's?" and she is "Fuck yeah I love that place". And you're ecstatic because you found one of the good ones. So then there you are sitting across from each other eating of each others plate, when suddenly you feel her rubbing your leg under the table. So you look up at her and she is looking at you with those eyes, those bedroom eyes.
And you know that fucking expression that is on her face, but you play it off as "What?" and she replies with "Lets go fuck in the bathroom" And you come back with "We cant fuck in the bathroom, there are people here. There is an old couple staring at us. The waitress is probably thinking with going to dine and dash" She says "Ill tell you what. I'm going to the bathroom and I'm going to wait to get fucked, and i hope its by you"
And off she goes to the bathroom, and you are left at the table stammering like an idiot. Then you start looking around, and you are scared and your heart is pounding. And you look over at the old couple who are enjoying the early bird special, and you lock eyes with the 80 odd year old woman is looking at you so disapprovingly, whilst beside her, her 85 year old husband has a ear to ear grin and is mouthing the word "GOOOO" at you.
So you get the fuck up and you go to the bathroom, and you look and hope that she is in the men's, but no she is going to make you work for it. So you go into the ladies bathroom and enter the stall, and there she is. You lock the door, and you start fucking hardcore in the Zeff's bathroom right against the stall partition wall. And its passionate and feverish, at one point your foot slips in the bowl, she accidentally hits the flusher, and when she climaxes she is loud. Everyone in the restaurant knows what going on and you just don't care.
Is that too much to ask for?
4 years ago
No I'm not dead. I've just been working like a motherfucker.
So since my last journal what have I been up to? Work work work.
Well let's pick up from last journal. Leigh and I went and saw Kevin Smith, and it was awesome.
A few months later Leigh and I parted ways.
I've bought 2 new audi's. I have a 2011 TTRS which is and awesome car. But not wanting to use it as a daily driver I picked up a heavily modified 2002 S4. With 2 Ko4 Frankenturbo's, full cat back exhaust the car has 492 horsepower at the wheels, which is a lot.
And since I have had it I installed an 8.3 inch in dash display that does divx, mp4, DVD, gps, Bluetooth, all that shit.
But that wasn't enough, so I installed an xbox360 and a 3G wireless internet router as well. That's right, I can play call of duty whilst stuck at traffic lights.
But right now I'm not even in Australia. I'm out enjoying the world on holidays. I was invited to Tampere, Finland by a friend for the premiere of the new film Iron Sky. It's a film about Nazis from the dark side of the moon. When it comes out in Australia I suggest you go see it if you like dark comedy.
After the movie premiere I got to go to after party and hang out with cast and crew of the film. It was awesome and the live music was supplied by the band Laibach, who did the films soundtrack. By the end of the night I was well and truly drunk and my cost had been signed by the cast of Iron Sky with a paint pen.
A few days later the director posted an interview with the lead female actor on YouTube and at the 49 second mark a drunken me wanders through the back ground. Check the link.
But prior to that I was in Russia for a week and had a good time there. I tried to consult with a Russian I used to know about what to do for the quintessential "Russian experience" but they didn't get back to me. So I did the touristy thing around Moscow.
But right now I sit alone in a restaurant in Stockholm, Sweden wondering if my steak will ever be ready as I have typed all this out on my iPhone since they have taken my order.
I get back into Australia on the 12th of April as after Sweden I'm heading over for 3 days to Norway, then a 2 day layover in Amsterdam.
But, and I know this will piss my boss off, after 28 days on holidays, ignoring emails and phone calls, I'm taking the 26th off as I have tickets to go see Kevin Smith and Jason Mews... Thus bringing us full circle and this journal to an end.
Bellow is a link to the full 1 hour 15 minute Q&A from sydneys Armageddon 27-2-2011 with Matt and Geoff
I am also currently re-encoding it to a mkv and will upload it as a torrent for those who want a full hd download of the pannel
If you asked a question mention what you question was below.
I was the guy Matt mentioned about being back on the old phpbb forums, and my questions where about seeing "the schdule", why Geoff picked "Lazor" as his middle name, and if a talking fish gave geoff 3 wishes, what would they be.
5 years ago
5 years ago
5 years ago
ok, this is open to everyone. lets have some fun. feel free to invite people to have a guess.
Right the contest is to see who can get the closest to what it cost me to get the audi fixed.
If you are the closest you get a $10 itunes gift card/$10 in your paypal account.
If you are the closest and within $100 of the cost you get $20 itunes/paypal
If you are winner and get the exact price you get $50 itunes/paypal.
So get guessing. you get 1 guess.
Now rememeber the engine was totaly cooked. and i had the clutch replaced at the same time.
Contest will close monday the 31st at what ever time i remember to do it.
And then I would wonder if I was losing my mind. Did I delight in heaving back and forth in bed at night, waking the next morning exhausted and ill-tempered? Come now, i would say to myself, all this anguish over her? All this torment for an ex-cocktail waitress, a two faced cunt who only wanted my money, house, name and piece of mind? Did I really want to become half of a completely insane, self-destructive, self- defeating union?
Yes! I screamed. Yes! YES!
That's right Jack, I'm watching you - Ira Gaines
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