I'm going to throw together some journals about what it's like to have severe sleep apnea (that apparently went untreated for decades, oops) and the process to being strapped with an invisible air dick lodged down your throat. As in everything else in my life, we'll start with the fourth part first and the first part second.
I set up the Hosetopus by my bed. The machine which grants it life to faceromp me with forced air is rather fancy, relative to all the machines I've seen that other people I know use. It also needs to use distilled water, which is feeding the frivilous purchase beast in me to buy a $200 water distiller rather than buy $0.80 gallons that will only last me a couple of weeks each (I could make back my savings in a quick 9 years!... well, before factoring in the electricity to run the machine, so 10, 11?).
So far I've only done the demo with it while the tech was here to walk me through a brochure. He was very friendly, but it felt like something I could have ordered on Amazon and just skimmed the brochure for how to use it. Specially since I think I don't fit the mask. The tech said I had thirty days to change my mind to another model, which is likely to be one day since I think this is a case of my One Size Doesn't Fit All head (my head is 1.5" above One-For-All, so that I have extra brain matter to spend thinking about video games I don't ever get to play).
So the actual machine. Ugh. It's so weird, the sensation of it. I named my machine Hosetopus. That's because it's a contraption of straps and hose and whatnot, neatly rodgering you at point blank to your nose. If you ever want to know what swapping spit with a facehugger is like, get yourself a cup of apnea. Different machines have different settings and features. Mine starts at setting A, ramps to B over X minutes, then monitors when you breath in and out to increase/decrease pressure, and increases pressure in general if the pressure is not enough to keep your body from trying to choke you in your sleep (thanks, Obama). Because I lucked out with severe apnea, my pressure settings limit the Hosetopus options to just a full face mask, in fear that the other masks will be flung away like an unsecured airlock. I may take up costuming the mask to look like Bane's so I can pioneer sleep-cosplay, but that's for another post. In any event, when the air is pressurized, it's a unique (and for me, unwelcome) sensation that has me give respect to anyone who can deepthroat. At least I imagine with deepthroating a thing (swords are things too, perverts) there is an actual physical object the brain can be like, "wtf lol why am I hilt deep up on this sword?!" The pressurized air helps my fat lazy neck from collapsing on me faster than a kid's chair collapsing on me during musical chairs. What they don't mention is that it's much like the Force, it's there, always.
Tonight I get to experience a full deepthroating air-d session. I'm picturing not getting much sleep the first few days while my body figures out what I'm doing to it, not too different than when trying to free a wild animal from something it got caught on, "I WILL BITE THE SHIT OUT OF YOh hey that feels so much better not having that cord wrapped around my leg like that." I suppose in the interim before part 5, it's a good time to jump back to the beginning (See, there was a plan all along! Even if I made it up on the conscious part of the brain as I wrote that line, but I'm sure the subconcious Tyler in me had things under control).
In Tyler we trust.