Forums > The Basement

Lies Your Parents Told You

Posts (404)

  • AryaStark

    AryaStark

    #234303 - 14 years ago

    You know, try to come up with as many as you can. "No, no sweetie. The music means that the van is all out of ice cream." "You'll die from playing in the mud." "This is gonna hurt me more than it's gonna hurt you." "When two people love each other very much...." etc. etc.

  • SMM

    SMM

    #234307 - 14 years ago

    In reply to AryaStark, #1:

    Your parents must've hated you, I never got told that mud would kill you.

    Biggest lie I ever got told was that anal sex doesn't hurt unless you're under two years old. I hated my dad :(

  • AryaStark

    AryaStark

    #234312 - 14 years ago

    In reply to SMM, #2:

    uhhh...... thank you for that last bit. uhh..... damn that's fucked up.

  • SMM

    SMM

    #234329 - 14 years ago

    In reply to AryaStark, #:

    I was also told that pouring whiskey on a tear on the anus was a good antiseptic.

    Complete bullshit, too.

  • AryaStark

    AryaStark

    #234344 - 14 years ago

    In reply to DevilNuts, #5:

    dude, you need counciling.

  • SMM

    SMM

    #234348 - 14 years ago

    In reply to AryaStark, #6:

    SOME PEOPLE JUST DON'T GET IT

  • Wrar

    Wrar

    #234360 - 14 years ago

    In reply to DevilNuts, #5:
    Dude, that's the most fucked up thing I've heard all week.

  • AryaStark

    AryaStark

    #234361 - 14 years ago

    In reply to SMM, #7:

    I know I suck! Leave me to wallow in my stupidity.

  • Necrocanibal

    Necrocanibal

    #234384 - 14 years ago

    This isn't from my parents...but it still fits in. My priest said he loved me...but all he wanted was my tender boy flesh... :'(........

  • Wire

    Wire

    #234409 - 14 years ago

    That the Easter Bunny actually existed. Hey I think it would be cool if he did.

  • darkstitch

    darkstitch

    #234416 - 14 years ago

    "your possed by a demon"
    "You put a spell on me and made me crash"
    "If I got you a trampoline it would cost $1,000 extra on my insurance"
    "You caused $9,000 worth of damge when you dented my car"


    /evil parents.

  • Shindo

    Shindo

    #234440 - 14 years ago

    In reply to Wire, #11:

    That the Easter Bunny actually existed. Hey I think it would be cool if he did.


    The easter Bunny does exist!!! doesnt he ? *quivering lip*

  • Kaitlin

    Kaitlin

    #234811 - 14 years ago

    In reply to zog34, #14:

    That Santa doesn't exist.

    Honestly, the lies parents tell you.

  • Trogdor

    Trogdor

    #234885 - 14 years ago

    Life is worth living.

  • Sarge806

    Sarge806

    #234975 - 14 years ago

    In reply to Necrocanibal, #10:

    O_______o.......... WOW. dude, yeah... *shudder* glad im a chick. and i dont do anything involving preists.

    the parent-lie thing:
    "we have money saved up for your college!"
    "if you bought a car, my insurance would SKYROCKET. therefore, no car for you."
    "you're grounded."

    ~*Devi

  • athens

    athens

    #235096 - 14 years ago

    They found me in a cabage patch, then they made me in a test tube, that I believe!

  • concept1

    concept1

    #235105 - 14 years ago

    That I would go blind from jerking off. I now have nightvision instead.

  • Kamikaze

    Kamikaze

    #235126 - 14 years ago

    My parents never told me any lies.

    YOU ALL CAME FROM BROKEN HOMES HAHAHA THATS HILARIOUS

  • JulyFlame

    JulyFlame

    #235171 - 14 years ago

    Acually, in all truth, they haven't really lied to me in big ways,but it's beeen a hell of a job keeping them from knowing I sortched the frigging carpet.

  • Razorblade

    Razorblade

    #235374 - 14 years ago

    Hmm, when I was about 12, my dad promissed me a TV with a ramote, a bean bag, a telescope, a stereo, a Nintendo 64, and my own computer... 6 or 7 years later, I got a computer (I've used it sooooo much >_<) and I got a TV with a broken ramote (I've used it sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much)
    And I got none of the other things >_<... I WANT MY N64!!!!.......Ok, well, I settle for an Xbox then :P

  • DecoyMilk

    DecoyMilk

    #235378 - 14 years ago

    My mum said that the child benefits she received from having me was for her to spend on clothes for herself.

    Whore.

  • AryaStark

    AryaStark

    #235394 - 14 years ago

    "This isn't for me, it's for you." I never need to go to college!

  • crispyXbow

    crispyXbow

    #237506 - 14 years ago

    ok, big family = lots of lies. my parents in particular?

    "you can be whatever you want when you grow up"
    "we don't have favorites!"
    "i wasn't listening to your phone calls!"
    "i'm sure you'll get taller."
    "when we move, you'll make plenty of new friends"
    "no, your mother wasn't pregnant when we got married." (it only works until your child is old enough to do simple math and know where babies come from, folks.)

  • Jordan4567

    Jordan4567

    #237536 - 14 years ago

    "Of course we have a college fund set up for you."

    "Just because your dad cheated on me and left me doesn't mean that he's a bad person."

  • manofsteal02

    manofsteal02

    #237965 - 14 years ago

    They have told me I was adopted when im not....DICKS