Holy ANTI-n00b Crusade
Well, All the experts whom used to work with me have left so its my job to turn u n00bs into decent beings.......
TALONS GUIDE TO HUNTIN NOOBS
1. they like to travel in packs so watch out
2. they will soon regroup so move fast
3. N00bs scare easly and r considered dangerous
4. n00bs use stuff like OMG STFU all the time
5. n00bs are cowards who dont protect their own women (if they have any)
6. n00bs also talk alot of stuff (but keep ur cool,dont get intimedated)
7. n00bs run alot take ur time to bring em down
8. n00bs have capslock on alot of the time
9. n00bs dont like bullets and we dont like them
10. their weapons consist of pineapples, needlers, plasma grenades, and sharp sticks
11. When hunting n00bs aim for the head or their feet
12. n00bs are like a school on the holiday.....No class
13. n00bs use leet speak and will try to fit in anywere
14. n00bs are also loud and annoying
15. n00bs ussauly are found sleeping or smiling at nothing
N00B HUNTIN LODGE
PM ME IF U WANNA PLAY.....
N00b death count
Plan b: 18
My sniper rifles name is the MIGRANE and its sister the HEADSPLITTER
1. The Girl Scout- Your basic fucking Noob camper. Enjoys flagcamping and watching the grass grow.
2.The Elephant- Noob who camps in the exact same spot every time he spawns. He's like an elephant, following some instinctive knowledge to go to this location and die.
3. The Coward - As the first shot hits him, freaks out and does this bizarre running/jumping/flailing dance that makes him look like a damn demented leprechaun
4. The Sleeper - That motherfucker who goes AFK five minutes in and takes up a spot on your team that could be occupied by a live body.
5. The Blind Man - Can't aim for shit. Any kills he gets will occur when he is aiming for someone else, many of them TKs. This type is often combined with...
6. The Lee Harvey Oswald - That bastard who MUST HAVE the sniper rifle every game. He will camp out over its spawn point because he CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT IT. This is often combined with...
7. The Benedict Arnold - Not just a TKer, but a TKer who kills you for the weapon you're holding, often the sniper rifle. Bitch.
8. The Orator- Spends so much time saying things, impressing us all with his wit, that's he's too goddamn busy to actually do anything but provide cannon fodder for your opponents.
9. The General - Gives orders like he has any idea what the fuck he's doing "Drive Me!", " Get the flag!", and "Go up on the cliff" are popular ones.
10. The JFK Jr. - Basard who grabs the Banshee and then puts on a display of flying that makes you wonder if he can dress himself in the morning. Crashes into hills, ridges, cliffs,hogs, tanks, ghosts, and just about eveyrthing EXCEPT your enemies.
11. The Princess Di's Driver- Cannot go five feet in the hog, usually with you in the backseat, without flipping it over, running it into a fall, or driving it directly over a grenade helpfully provided by your opponents.
12. The Man of Steel- Walks a straight, unvarying path straight to the enemy's base, regardless of any incoming fire or vehicles, because apparently he thinks the bullets will bounce right off him.
13. The Donut - The noob that somehow manages to grab the opponents flag, then gets lost on the way back to the base. It's Blood Gulch, you stupid bastard, not New York City. Quite fucking easy to navigate.
14. The Statue - The noob that somehow manages to grab the opponents flag, then just sits in their base, hoping they'll forget about him. And if they come in, he doesn't move, apparently convinced that his opponents are T-Rexes and can't see him if he doesn't move.
and finally, the most satisfying noob of all...
15. The Human Cannonball - The noob that goes flying 100 yards through the air after he meets his well desrved demise.
14 years ago
Holy ANTI-n00b Crusade