I totally went to this "special" Bar tonight so I could releive some sexual frustration.(The porno just wasnt cutting it tonight...*TeHe*). I was a little scared but once I got over the initial shock,I started to notice how cute the bartender was.(My pants got tight...*TeHe*).
As I made my way through the cuples of drunk horny men I was even more turned on(Even more so by the big hairy tranny that offered me a drink*TeHe*).
As I finally made it to my destination I made no attempt to hide my Erection(small as it may be...*TeHe*)
I ordered the most expensive drink in the bar.*TeHe* The Bartender told me to pay upfront because of the cost of the drink. I said OK and as I reached for my wallet I knocked over the glass,wasting it all. Unfortunately I had no money.*TeHe* I told him not to worry because I could "re-pay" him.
The bartender Had no problem getting "re-payed".It was Kind of weird how little of a fight he put up.I thought nothing of it at the time though*TeHe*.
Soon he was re-payed behind the bar(Or at least I was). He was rather offended by my actions and had me pay,in full,the price of the drink and 100 more dollars*TeHe?*
Oh well I was satisfyed, Daddy always liked my penis....(to each's own I guess). At least that's what I thought until I figured out I can't even take a shit or sit down right without a cushion or extensive lubrication.IT BURNS WHEN I PEE!!
TeHe?...NO !! FUCK the TeHe damnit it fucking BURNS!!!!
*extensive sobbing*

And to think if I was not such a asshole then my asshole would not be burning right now.

Tatum,"WHY GOD"?
GOD,"Swallow a knife, nobody likes you. I like the Mormons more than you"
Tatum,"My asshole uber-burns"!! *Lots of crying*......