31337_man

Male
from The border between worlds

  • Activity

    • Just dropping by...

      7 years ago

      31337_man

      And I thought I'd cover up my last journal entry with this distraction. Consider yourself distracted.

    • War is Gay

      in Forums > War is Gay | Follow this topic

      31337_man

      Since man first walked the Earth, war has always been about who has the bigger, harder tool. Sometimes, a war would be won by the one who can use his more quickly. Other times, the victor was the one who could use his to fire longer distances – like at so many redneck barbeques. But regardless of the method, it always comes down to a comparison of phalluses.

      In the days of the caveman, it was a matter of who could club the other harder. Yes, it was indeed a contest of who had the bigger, harder, longer wood. But as the use of stone weapons led to the invention of spears, men moved up from beating each other’s stiff wood to penetrating each other with the tips of their long, hard rods.

      Years passed, and the development of metal weapons led to the creation of swords which were harder and had more stamina than the old fashioned spears. Certainly the spear was longer, but the sword could go deeper and go longer. But of course, when crossing swords with another man it’s important to note that it’s not gay if the handles don’t touch.

      Eventually the invention of gun powder led to the creation of projectile weapons. Now a man could jam a metal rod down his musket hole and then blow his hot payload out all over another man. Men would line up on opposite sides of a field and just march at each other, letting their hot spray wash over the opposing forces. This kind of technology was also applied to naval warfare as ships were equipped with long, hard cannons and big, heavy balls. Whole ships of men would use these cannons to blow hot loads off onto one another until somebody sank.

      As automatic weapons came into existence, it became possible for one man to easily unload onto several other men surrounding him in a sort of reverse bukake. And around the same time, in order to reduce the fatality of receiving a hot load all over one’s chest, ballistic armor was developed. This allowed a man to receive another man’s hot load over and over again so he could keep coming back for more.

      Parallel to the development of firearms was the development of a somewhat kinkier invention: the BM… er… I mean… bomb. The idea was to allow an aircraft to drop a big, hot, steamy pile out a hole in its bottom onto a town as it laid back and took it all in the face. Naturally, the results would be messy and the cleanup exhausting, but that’s just what some people are into.

      Leaving you with these newfound insights into the homoeroticism of war, I’d like you to discuss what other evidence might support the theory that war is gay. Or better yet, prove me wrong.

      *I decided against posting this in the P&CE forum due to how immature and vulgar it is. Enjoy.*
      *Keep in mind that I'm mentally unstable and wrote this while ill. Cheerio.*
      *It is important to note that very little – if any – of this is factual. Good day.*

      9 replies

    • New 31337_Man

      9 years ago

      31337_man

      Now with 20% more respect for Canadians!

      One day 3 men were walking across this bridge; an American, a
      Canadian, and a Frenchie. When they got to the middle of the
      bridge, the Frenchie stopped, pulled a bottle of wine out of his
      pack, and threw it over the bridge. The Canadian & the American
      both yelled out "What the hell did you do that for?" The
      Frenchie just shrugged and said "We've got too much of that in
      our country" The American, catching the Frencies drift, pulled
      out a pack of ciggaretes and threw them over the bridge. The
      Canadian and the Frenchie both yelled out, "What the hell did
      you do that for?" The american shrugged and said "We have too
      many of those in our country"

      Now, the Canadian thought for a long time, and finnaly, he
      picked up the Frenchie and threw him into the water. The
      American looked at him in dis belief and said "Why in gods name
      did you do that?" and the Canadian replied, "We've got too many
      of those in our country."

    • some link

      9 years ago

      31337_man

      www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_HPvAhnG_w&annotation_id=annotation_803852&feature=iv

      I had to store this somewhere until the groups section returns. I knew we should have kept an LP thread running in the forums.

    • I know what you're thinking.

      10 years ago

      31337_man

      "You stupid piece of shit!" It was two AM (EST). I was bored. Here's a suggestion.

      It's not like it's the only avatar trend I've poorly parodied.


      Fail journal is fail - good thing no one saw it yet. I need to log more in when I'm fully awake.

    • What type was yours today?

      in Forums > What type was yours today? | Follow this topic

      31337_man

      We have all heard more than our fair share of poop jokes in our lifetimes, but today I would like to talk seriously about our poop. I would like to know what type yours is on the Bristol Stool Chart? Please, no pictures; this thread is only for giving a concise description of what you gave up in your daily offerings to the porcelain gods.

      Today, mine was a moderate to dark brown type four with a softer light brown underbelly followed by a small dark brown type six.

      Post edited 3/29/09 8:37PM

      19 replies

    • Back from a ricockulously long absence.

      10 years ago

      31337_man

      You are not seeing a ghost. Whatever one person actually sees this before tomorrow, know that I'll be back then. Just clearing all alerts today, then getting some laundry done and studying for midterms in the coming week.

      Edit:
      One last thing: Fuck Bob Marley; listen to Tim Henson.

    • Sightings

      in Forums > Sightings | Follow this topic

      31337_man

      Discuss any examples you've seen recently.
      First of all, I'd like to mention that the postal codes in my area begin with 117; my ID number at my school ends in 117; my mother's birthday is 11/7; the other day when I was filling out an online form, I looked up to see that the word count was 117; one of the police cruisers that patrol the campus is numbered 117; in Aqua Teen Hunger Force, the house number is 1171; in the Ben Stiller movie, "Duplex," his character's rival writes a novel titled Murder at 11:17; and I always manage to look at a clock when it's either 1:17, 11:17, 11:07, or 10:17.

      It seems as though this number is everywhere I go, and there may be a reason or it may just be coincidence.

      14 replies

    • pancakes

      in Forums > pancakes | Follow this topic

      31337_man

      I get mine from a can, motherfuckers! They're cancakes! DISCUSS!
      batter-blasters.jpg

      2 replies

  • About Me

  • Comments (287)

    • nikzbitz

      10 years ago

      Good to know. Im glad you've decided to join us.

    • 31337_man

      10 years ago

      I thought I'd put this here too for good measure.

      Well since the KGB has a declaration of war right in their news section (Really? War? On a gaming and machinima forum?) and after a quick skimming of the news and forum sections of the USSRvB I have found no such frivolities, I have decided to take you up on that offer to leave the crazies.
    • nikzbitz

      10 years ago

      Greetings, Comrade. We at the USSRvB couldn't help but notice how you're also part of at least one group that copycated us and spammed our members. Unfortunately, as elements of these groups have persisted in harassing us, we have been forced to close the group to all of them. We'd like to offer you the opportunity to ally yourself once and for all with us, as your contributions to the group have been valued and we would prefer not to lose you to them.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      I knew about that movie already =P

    • Brockly

      10 years ago

      I'll upload some gameplay, sorry.
      I haven't installed the drivers to my camera yet... (I used my friends)
      Try checking in a few days or so. Or, I'll just message you when I actually get it going.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      Oh hush it up you.

    • Roger___That

      10 years ago

      there

    • Roger___That

      10 years ago

      bottle of tylenol flu

    • Joe_2

      10 years ago

      Who's Margot?

    • Joe_2

      10 years ago

      gtfo

    • Brockly

      10 years ago

      Math is awesome!

    • Brockly

      10 years ago

      YEAH YEAH!

    • Brockly

      10 years ago

      WHITE CASTLE ROCKS!

    • Jengaship FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Travancore on DD

      10 years ago

      Thanks for understanding.

    • Jengaship FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Travancore on DD

      10 years ago

      Hey, man. Do me a solid and leave Team Badcore. Nothing against you, but t was meant to be a very small group.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      Nope.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      I can only imagine that there not human, seeing as they listen to such bad music, drink such terrible drinks, and blindly argue about the quality of the bands music with oh so whitey lines like "Ur a fag" and "U R just a hatr MMCLWOSIRJGS" or my personal favorite "If you don't like it, don't listen to it/"

      I'm fine with the casual fans... sort of. Its these dipshits that are actually proud of being in a stupid cult surrounding a shitty "band".

    • animecrazy

      10 years ago

      the wookies group has modded you

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      I'll keep it in mind.

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      Oh, this kid doesn't bother me at all, he's just entertainment.

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      Well, he did wait a few months, I think.

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      So wait, he's violating the rules, yes?

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      He's mad because a friend of mine (Sircatnipman) and I started laughing at him when he was making second accounts to have cyber sex with himself on his own profile. Cat reported him and he was banned, he made more profiles and was banned for a while until he resurfaced recently and blames me for his stupidity.

    • JediJesus87

      10 years ago

      You do know why that kid hates me, yes?

    • beccafawn

      10 years ago

      Well it's my friend's name on myspace and I'm pretty sure one of the late night tv hosts said something about it last night.

    • animecrazy

      10 years ago

      thanks for joining the Wookies

    • r0xx0rz

      10 years ago

      man where the fuck do all these clones come from

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      No, but it does have anthropomorphic slimes, vampires, zombies, ninjas, sticks, magic, explosions, pregnancy, evil children, psychopaths, and shadow magic.

    • FireHazzard

      10 years ago

      You keeping it slamming?

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      I've gone back and played all the Atari, Calicovision, Nes, Snes, and Sega games, and I've liked most of them.

      Now what does that have to do with pre rendered game play footage looking worse than the actual game instead of better?

    • VinnyV

      10 years ago

      Just a curiosity, why was my thread deleted?

    • Kaatman

      10 years ago

      ah, I see.

    • Kaatman

      10 years ago

      I've gotta know, what am I supposed to see in your FAIL! image?

      I suppose I am just as bad, I just don't know what I'm as bad as.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      i still have no idea what your taking about :-/

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      The first paragraph was just so I could summarize the story, and remember this was made for a newspaper so the people don't have Wikipedia available to check story's.

      But what's this Raider gag your talking about?

    • Roger___That

      10 years ago

      >.>
      <.<

    • middyfrosh

      10 years ago

      That's usually how it happens.

    • middyfrosh

      10 years ago

      Thanks for the pic comments.

    • spikelife

      10 years ago

      Who is this clown you speak of?

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      Oh...
      ...
      ...

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      She follows me.

      Plus I was using our upstairs computer because that's the one with photoshop.

      ....Wait how did you know my house had two stories?

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      She comes upstairs.

    • spikelife

      10 years ago

      So what is it you have against EA sports?

    • Patawan

      10 years ago

      I don't watch Heroes either. And whenever I see a TV ad for it, I just think, "Thank God!"

    • spikelife

      10 years ago

      Yeah I was called a troller. Basically some one called me an idiot and I fed into the insults and then all the guys online ganged up on me so then I got belligerent on the forum and got banned smiley4.gif LOL this whole "Forum" thing is still very confusing to me!

    • Foolsfolly

      10 years ago

      The Sims 2 was kind of fun for a while, but to get the full feal of the game, you had to buy new features through expansion packs, which meant shelling out more mon... Oh MY God. Fuck EA.


      ...ok. Why'd you feel like sharing?

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      No one every really said "OMG".

      And thats what I try to tell them. But when you try to tell them that they just call you a dirty faggot.

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      No, I just keep getting all these little kids going

      "CAN YOU HELP ME WITH THIS ACHIEVEMENT"
      "ACHIEVEMENTS PLEASE"
      "OMG ACHIEVEMNETS"

    • prahanormal

      10 years ago

      Most likely in my town.

      I have this strange feeling that there lying though In the same way people said I'd get a scholarship for crew.

    • clayleyva

      10 years ago

      Yeah, i was more making fun of the person who cited Urbandictionary as a legitimate source of information.

  • Questions

    No questions have been answered yet