I've been writing the script for a machinima series I hope to make on and off for the last few months, and I thought I'd post it here in case anyone wants to read it. Sorry, I've got to post it in parts because I can't fit a whole episode in one post.
Muzz is walking along Last ResortÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s sea wall. He passes another soldier manning a turret.
Turret guy: Hey.
Muzz walks underneath Jackson (a sniper) on a ledge above him. He looks up and calls to him.
Muzz: In a bored tone: Ã¢â‚¬ËœSup Jackson.
Jackson: Hey Muzza.
Muzz: Any invading forces coming to threaten our safety, democracy, way of life and all that bullshit the government tells weÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re representing?
Jackson: Nah. He looks out to sea through his rifle scope. Just a bunch of fishing trawlers from round the cape.
Muzz: Kind of a bugger, eh? This place is boring as batshit.
Jackson: Tell me about it. This way of life sucks, why canÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t Commies or someone come and replace it with a new one?
Muzz: Chuckles. Yeah. Hey, you seen Damien around anywhere?
Jackson: In a childish, mocking voice. Aw, you mean your widdle best boyfwend in the whole wide world?
Muzz: In an exasperated tone. Whatever.
Jackson: I swear, if you guys were any closer youÃ¢â‚¬â„¢d be wearing the same undies.
Muzz: Hey, we grew up together, all right? We went to the same school, the same high schoolÃ¢â‚¬Â¦
Jackson: He sighs. MuzzaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s voice continues in the background. Here we go again.
Muzz: Ã¢â‚¬Â¦we got our first jobs together, then we went to the same uniÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ He pauses. For as long as I can remember we both always wanted to spend our whole lives traveling together, never settling down, always having fun.
Jackson: Lets out a short laugh. And then you ended up here for two years. What the hell happened?
Muzz: Nothing. This shitÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s just a way to earn money. WeÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll go traveling, donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t you worry.
Jackson: Yeah sure. Under his breath: Whatever helps you sleep at night.
Muzz: What was that?
Jackson: What? Nothing. I didnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t say anything.
Muzz: Whatever, do you know where Damien is?
Jackson: Yeah, heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s patrolling somewhere up further along the wall.
Muzz: Cheers Jackson. Later.
Muzz continues along the wall, passing another guy on a turret, and a bunch of people below standing around a couple of vehicles and talking. Muzz stops and watches them.
Guy 1: Ã¢â‚¬Â¦and then Caboose is like: Ã¢â‚¬Å“Why are there six pedals if thereÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s only four directions!Ã¢â‚¬Â
They all laugh.
Guy 1: Struggling for breath. And heÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s like, totally jammed up against this rock, fuckinÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ spinning around and facing the skyÃ¢â‚¬Â¦
Guy 2: Also struggling for breath. Man, you gotta show me that shit. What site was it on?
The shot moves back to Muzz. He chuckles and continues along the wall. He turns into a gap that leads inside the wall, and spots Damien up ahead.
He turns around, walks up a short ramp and waits. The man on the turret underneath him looks at him.
Muzz: Hey. DonÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t mind me. IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m not here.
Turret guy: He sighs. Whatever.
Damien turns around and starts coming back the other way. He passes under Muzz and Muzz coughs. Damien turns around, but no oneÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s there. Muzz drops down and sneaks up behind him. When Damien turns back Muzz is standing there.
Muzz: Did you fart?
Damien: He takes a quick step back. Holy shit!
Muzz: Or do you always smell like that?
Damien: Fuck Muzz, you scared the crap out of me.
Muzz: Hello to you to Damien.
Damien: He sighs. In a singsong voice: Hello Murry.
They are both silent for a few seconds then they both crack up laughing.
Muzz: Your turn. I reckon that scareÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s got to be worth seven out of ten. Top that.
Damien: Seven? Bullshit! Five and a half at the most!
Muzz: As if!
Damien: What, compared to the one I got you with on Tuesday?
The turret guy in the background struggles to conceal a laugh. Muzz addresses him.
Muzz: Hey, shut up.
Turret guy: Come on, that was funny.
Damien joins in on the laughter.
Muzz: No it wasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t.
Damien: Yes it was.
Turret guy: Yeah, I mean with the TV, and then he-
Muzz: SHUT UP!
They all go silent. Then Muzz starts cracking up and the others follow suit.
Damien: Admit it, it was a stroke of genius.
Mzzz: Yeah, all right, it was.
The turret guy continues laughing, now the only one.
Muzz: Hey, nobody asked you.
The turret guy looks at the ground dejectedly and turns back to his turret.
Turret guy: Sniffling: Fine. Faggot.
There is a momentÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s silence.
Damien: So, howÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s your day been?
Muzz: Same old, same old. Patrol the wall. Sneak off for a swim. Patrol the wall. Have lunch. Patrol the wall. Bitch about how boring this job is to Jackson. Patrol the wall. You know. How about you?
Damien: You know. Patrol the wallÃ¢â‚¬Â¦
Muzz: Alright, alright, I think I get the picture.
Damien: Sarcastically: Really? Tell me what I did next then.
Muzz: Patrol theÃ¢â‚¬Â¦
Damien: Bingo. Man, IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ve known you al these years and I never knew you were psychic.
They both look at each other and crack up laughing.
Muzz: I know IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m laughing but I swear IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m about to burst out crying with boredom!
Damien: God, I know what you mean. I swear I can feel my brain cells committing suicide one by one.
Their laughing fades and they pause in silence.
Damien: Hey, is my heads up display wrong or is it really 2:30?
Muzz: No, mine reads the same.
Damien: ThatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s weird: that means our shiftÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s over. I wonder why Gaz and the crew havenÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t come and relieved us?
Muzz: Dunno. Ah well, who cares? If Gaz doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t show up for the one useful thing he does for mankind, thatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s his problem.
Damien: Yeah, I suppose youÃ¢â‚¬â„¢re right. Come on, letÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s go.