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from Seattle Washington

  • Activity

    • Have you seen this...

      14 years ago


      Wal-Mart and other compinies at the moment are advertising back to school shit. Ya thanks for reminding me the school is coming around right after I got done with it. You know what I saw go Fuck yourself.

    • Eposide 3

      14 years ago


      I just saw this movie last friday and its was preatty good Though sometimes scenes wernt placed in the right time frame

    • Declaration of Revocation pt 3

      14 years ago


      13. From November 10th the UK will harmonise petrol (or

      "gasoline," as you will be permitted to keep calling it until

      April 1st 2005) prices with the former USA. The UK will

      harmonise its prices to those of the former USA and the Former

      USA will, in return, adopt UK petrol prices (roughly $6/US

      gallon -- get used to it).

      14. You will learn to resolve personal issues without using

      guns, lawyers or therapists. The fact that you need so many

      lawyers and therapists shows that you're not adult enough to be

      independent. Guns should only be handled by adults. If you're

      not adult enough to sort things out without suing someone or

      speaking to a therapist, then you're not grown up enough to

      handle a gun.

      15. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us


      16. Tax collectors from Her Majesty's Government will be

      with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all revenues due

      (backdated to 1776).

      Thank you for your co-operation.

    • Declaration If Revocation pt 2

      14 years ago


      6. You should stop playing American "football." There is

      only one kind of football. What you refer to as American

      "football" is not a very good game.

      The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world outside

      your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American"

      football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should

      instead play proper football.

      Initially, it would be best if you played with the girls. It is

      a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be

      allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American "football",

      but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or

      wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies).

      We are hoping to get together at least a US Rugby sevens side by


      You should stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host

      an event called the 'World Series' for a game which is not

      played outside of America. Since only 2.15% of you are aware

      that there is a world beyond your borders, your error is

      understandable. Instead of baseball, you will be allowed to play

      a girls' game called "rounders," which is baseball without fancy

      team strip, oversized gloves, collector cards or hotdogs.

      7. You will no longer be allowed to own or carry guns. You

      will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more

      dangerous in public than a vegetable peeler. Because we don't

      believe you are sensible enough to handle potentially dangerous

      items, you will require a permit if you wish to carry a

      vegetable peeler in public.

      8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 2nd will

      be a new national holiday, but only in England. It will be

      called "Indecisive Day."

      9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap, and

      it is for your own good. When we show you German cars, you will

      understand what we mean.

      All road intersections will be replaced with roundabouts. THIS


      You will start driving on the left with immediate effect. At the

      same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without

      the benefit of conversion tables. Roundabouts and metrication

      will help you understand the British sense of humour.

      10. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call

      'French fries' are not real chips. Fries aren't even French,

      they are Belgian though 97.85% of you (including the guy who

      discovered fries while in Europe) are not aware of a country

      called Belgium Those things you insist on calling potato chips

      are properly called "crisps." Real chips are thick cut and fried

      in animal fat. The traditional accompaniment to chips is beer

      which should be served warm and flat.

      Waitresses will be trained to be more aggressive with customers.

      11. As a sign of penance 5 grams of sea salt per cup will be

      added to all tea made within the Commonwealth of Massachusetts,

      this quantity to be doubled for tea made within the city of

      Boston itself.

      12. The cold tasteless stuff you insist on calling "beer" is

      not actually beer at all, it is lager. From November 1st only

      proper British Bitter will be referred to as "beer," and

      European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred

      to as "Lager." The substances formerly known as "American Beer"

      will henceforth be referred to as "Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine,"

      with the exception of the product of the American Budweiser

      company whose product will be referred to as "Weak Near-Frozen

      Gnat's Urine." This will allow true Budweiser (as manufactured

      for the last 1000 years in the Czech Republic) to be sold

      without risk of confusion

    • Declaration of Revocation

      14 years ago


      My friend sent me this i thought it was funny ( ill post the other 9 later)
      Declaration of Revocation

      by John Cleese

      To the citizens of the United States of America, in the light of

      your failure to elect a competent President of the USA and thus

      to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of

      your independence, effective today. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen

      Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states,

      commonwealths and other territories.

      Except Utah, which she does not fancy.

      To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the

      following rules are introduced with immediate effect:

      1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English


      Then look up "aluminium." Check the pronunciation guide. You

      will be amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it.

      The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'favour' and

      'neighbour'; skipping the letter 'U' is nothing more than

      laziness on your part. Likewise, you will learn to spell

      'doughnut' without skipping half the letters.

      You will end your love affair with the letter 'Z' (pronounced

      'zed' not 'zee') and the suffix "ize" will be replaced by the

      suffix "ise."

      You will learn that the suffix 'burgh' is pronounced 'burra'

      e.g. Edinburgh. You are welcome to re-spell Pittsburgh as

      'Pittsberg' if you can't cope with correct pronunciation.

      Generally, you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable

      levels. Look up "vocabulary." Using the same thirty seven words

      interspersed with filler noises such as "uhh", "like", and "you

      know" is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication.

      Look up "interspersed."

      There will be no more 'bleeps' in the Jerry Springer show. If

      you're not old enough to cope with bad language then you

      shouldn't have chat shows. When you learn to develop your

      vocabulary, then you won't have to use bad language as often.

      2. There is no such thing as "US English." We will let

      Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will

      be adjusted to take account of the reinstated letter 'u' and the

      elimination of "-ize."

      3. You should learn to distinguish the English and

      Australian accents. It really isn't that hard. English accents

      are not limited to cockney, upper-class twit or Mancunian

      (Daphne in Frasier).

      You will also have to learn how to understand regional accents

      --- Scottish dramas such as "Taggart" will no longer be

      broadcast with subtitles.

      While we're talking about regions, you must learn that there is

      no such place as Devonshire in England. The name of the county

      is "Devon." If you persist in calling it Devonshire, all

      American States will become "shires" e.g. Texasshire,

      Floridashire, Louisianashire.

      4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English

      actors as the good guys. Hollywood will be required to cast

      English actors to play English characters.

      British sit-coms such as "Men Behaving Badly" or "Red Dwarf"

      will not be re-cast and watered down for a wishy-washy American

      audience who can't cope with the humour of occasional political


      5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God

      Save The Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We

      would not want you to get confused and give up half way through.

    • Back online

      14 years ago


      Sorry i was off for a couple of weeks my internet was down. It turns out that the cat-5 cable wasn't pluged in all the way my fault. So go a head and laugh if you cant laugh at your self who can you laugh at.

      Oh and happy valintiens Day

    • A few Bumber stickers

      14 years ago


      Here are a few that aplie to me if you have any dont be afriade to post them.

      Proud member of PETA: People Eating Tasty Animals

      Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

      Some people just don't know how to drive. I call these people "everybody but me."

      Chaos. Panic Disorder. My work here is done.

    • Merry X-Mas

      14 years ago


      Merry X-Mas everone and have a great holidays

    • The Three gouhsts

      14 years ago


      If any has seen or heard the x-mas carol you know the three goughsts but do you know what they doy for a living well I have the answers.

      Goughsts of x-mas pass: A phycystrist or marrige cousulor.

      Goughst of x-mas present: Drug dealer.

      Goughsts of x-mas future: death but that one was preatty obivios but if you have any ideas tell me

      and dont coment on my spelling it suxs i know.

    • Okay now

      14 years ago


      Now sence its the 2nd of december I can live with x-mas stuff as you can see with my new pic. but sorry to phi 2 studios, plz dont sue me, and its relefcted and a bit longated so dont coment on how it looks okay.

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