BattleFrag91 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Something

25 years old
Not Specified
from Alabama backwoods

  • Activity

    • 50 Things That Movies Have Taught Me

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      Enjoy:

      1. All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.

      2. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.

      3. The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there, and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.

      4. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

      5. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.

      6. A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness.


      7. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.

      8. No matter how badly a spaceship is attacked, its internal gravity system is never damaged.

      9. The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love.

      10. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.

      11. Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.

      12. A cup of black coffee or a splash of cold water in the face is enough to render the most inebriated person stone cold sober.

      13. If you try hard enough, you can outrun an explosion.

      14. If you stick your head out of cover during a gun fight, it will never be hit, especially if you look backwards to hold a conversation with someone behind you.

      15. Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are assigned partners who are their total opposite.

      16. Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.

      17. You’re very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

      18. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.

      19. Computers never display a cursor on screen but always say: Enter Password Now.

      20. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off — even while scuba diving.

      21. All watches and clocks are synchronized to the second.

      22. No matter how fuzzy the photograph, it can be enlarged and enhanced to show the finest detail.

      23. Nearly everyone speaks English, no matter where they are from. Even aliens from outer space, despite the fact they have never been to Earth, seen an Earthling, or even heard of Earth or Earthlings.

      24. No matter how catastrophic the disaster, pets will always survive it.

      25. There will always be a doctor in a plane or building with the right medical supplies.

      26. No matter how dead you think you’ve killed a bad guy, he can still get up at least three more times.

      27. People rarely use the bathroom, and if they do, they’re usually dead within minutes.

      28. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

      29. Cemeteries generate their own weather. Usually rainstorms… and not just gentle sprinkles, but biblical downpours.

      30. When paying for a taxi, don’t look at your wallet as you take out a bill — just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

      31. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper clippings — especially if any of their family or friends have died in a strange boating accident.

      32. Cars that fly off cliffs spontaneously combust in midair for no apparent reason.

      33. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

      34. All computer disks will work in all computers, regardless of software.

      35. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that affects you personally at the precise moment that it is aired.

      36. Close blood relatives usually look nothing like each other, or have only a passing resemblance.

      37. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds — unless it’s the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.

      38. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.

      39. An electric fence that’s powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.

      40. If your town is threatened by an imminent natural disaster or killer beast, the mayor’s first concern will be the tourist trade or his forthcoming art exhibition.

      41. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts — your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.

      42. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

      43. If you are trapped in a tunnel, in a sinking ship, or a burning building, a cute little girl, a nun, and a feisty granny will be trapped with you.

      44. All writers are wealthy; all publishing companies are glamorous; all artists are self-supporting and have large attractive well-lit loft studios.

      45. Action heroes never face charges for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities to waste.

      46. During all police investigations it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once.

      47. If an expert makes a prediction and is disbelieved, then it will come to pass exactly as he predicted. If he makes a prediction and is believed, it won’t happen.

      48. If there is a large bump in a downhill road, a speeding car will fly over it and hit the ground in shower of sparks. Unsecured passengers will not be injured, and no tire damage, broken axles, or suspension failures will occur. The car will then execute a sharp turn involving a skid.

      49. Dogs always know who’s bad and will naturally bark at them.

      50. Text appearing on a computer monitor appears letter by letter and making a sound as if it was produced by a typewriter.

    • 8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something
    • Operation Prom Date

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      I'm making a note here: HUGE SUCCESS.



      That is all.

    • My dog just typed on my keyboard.

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      `AQQQXCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXD


      I had to post this.

    • And so it starts, the end is near.

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      Today will be the last time, it would seem, that I can sing this song.

      Tomorrow, I'm a senior.

    • 8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something
    • 8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something
    • 8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something
    • This is awesome.

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      I lol'd so hard.

      i.imgur.com/WfN7k.jpg

      WfN7k.jpg

      EDIT: My steam account also works now. (THANK YOU BEN)

    • Did I mention?

      8 years ago

      BattleFrag91 Something

      That you guys still need to send me friend invites on Steam. This way we can play TF2 together!

      My steam account: battlefrag91

  • Comments (470)

    • InsaneDC

      10 years ago

      It's on my profile in the About Me section! It's always been there!

    • halosavior

      10 years ago

      lol yes I am well aware of Travis and his movies. I have also seen his light saber prop tut. I may actually use it. Did you know that Travis filmed RvD 2?

    • halosavior

      10 years ago

      lol the vid you sent me was one I had linked smiley0.gif

    • MDosik FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      ...

      *cries*

    • MDosik FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      10 years ago

      Trying listening to the real one.

      That one will blow your mind.

    • WavyShadow

      10 years ago

      Thank you for seeing my point about OXM. They used to be great but now they're become a bunch of sponor ass kissers.

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      Haha, we were wondering where you went. Your controller must have disconnected or something because your headset disappeared.

    • Thechurch

      10 years ago

      yeah grammar errors can always be wound in anything i write.
      i type quickly and usually end up forgetting to recheck what i've written...

    • InsaneDC

      10 years ago

      Doesn't matter, I still think he did it on purpose.

    • PIRATE05

      10 years ago

      i dont think so. they should of beat georgia though.

      ROLL TIDE!!

    • Da_villain47

      10 years ago

      If you want me to, I could re-do the pictures. And hi, by the way.

    • masterdenae

      10 years ago

      Well, if so, welcome to the madness.

      smiley1.gif

    • masterdenae

      10 years ago

      Hmmmm. New watcher?

    • InsaneDC

      10 years ago

      That's true, watch doesn't work for any of the groups, but still. They should get that feature in.

    • halosavior

      10 years ago

      Uh I'm not officially apart of the clan. I need to talk to Amanda or Jessica. I talked to this one guy who was supposed to introduce me to the leaders at the time, but I believe he was one of the guys that left. I forgot what guy I was talking to. He forgot about me I suppose.

      Anyway the courses were designed to help build up a team of 4-5 to perform a tactic I used way back in Halo 2 before I met John or Walter. The objective is to win any objective gametype in 60 seconds or less. Everyone who was involved has long sense left live or I'm not Live friends with anymore. In either case I am the last person who has knowledge of the technique. We didn't have a name for it back then, but I think I'm going to call it "First Strike."

    • freelancer92

      10 years ago

      Poland.
      It's actually the old flag, before Germany invaded in WWII. The new one does not have the eagle on it.

    • freelancer92

      10 years ago

      It was just a stupid thing to say,
      I forgive you.

    • freelancer92

      10 years ago

      Time to move to Canada.


      Before you say anything STUPID like that again, do your research.
      As Dingo said, in Canada, we pay a considerable higher amount of taxes. And it applies to EVERYONE! Not just the people who make +$250,000. So why would you say you want to move to a country that does the thing you don't want in your own country? Actually, it's not even the same thing. You have it better off then we do. So quit your bitching, please.

    • freelancer92

      10 years ago

      AT LUNCH


      it's like 10:00. FAIL! XD

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      Yeah, that's true. My friend helped me adjust mine so it fired faster/harder.

    • kzuelch FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Voice of Freelancer Tex

      10 years ago

      The guys are working on a fix, so I can give you my award!

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      Haha, very nice.

      By the way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! smiley0.gif

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      I wish there was a +1 Fail so I could give it to you. XD

    • LinkMasta FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Sgt Koprulu

      10 years ago

      lol Well, thanks, I think!

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      It's all one demo, but yeah, Microsoft does fail.

    • Shotgunchief

      10 years ago

      That's because it's half single player and half multiplayer.

    • Nitro288

      10 years ago

      Its only collecting dust, and I don't like it anyways. Only reason i kept it was to play with friends of mines whom didn't want to play Halo 3.

      It was fun for a while, but I'm not a fan of its gameplay.

      Besides, i can also repurchase it if anything.

    • freelancer92

      10 years ago

      Yeah I know, are they all that ignorant that they can't realize i'm asking a specific question, and that wasn't addressed in the update?

    • QuackJAG

      10 years ago

      BATTLE!!!!!

    • BattleFrag91 FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Something

      11 years ago

      smiley12.gifsmiley11.gifsmiley10.gifsmiley9.gifsmiley8.gifsmiley7.gifsmiley6.gifsmiley5.gifsmiley4.gifsmiley3.gifsmiley2.gifsmiley1.gifsmiley0.gif

      I love being a sponsor again!

      Post edited 9/19/08 6:30PM

    • i_r_caboos

      11 years ago

      Nah. Just kidding. It's Garth Beavers.

    • Shotgunchief

      11 years ago

      You're very welcome. smiley0.gif I like making my friends happy.

      Post edited 9/18/08 9:10PM

    • froob

      11 years ago

      dude the skull was the frist thing i seen then i looked around

    • i_r_caboos

      11 years ago

      Fawk. You can't just put 'some guy I know on the internet'?

    • Nitro288

      11 years ago

      I got yo back

    • MDosik FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      11 years ago

      loljonmj2.jpg

      Here's that avatar you wanted. smiley8.gif

    • BirdPhobia

      11 years ago

      I need to talk to you.

    • BirdPhobia

      11 years ago

      Get on MSN!

    • InsaneDC

      11 years ago

      Dude, no.

      In caboose's words:

      He hasn't let it off why should I?

    • InsaneDC

      11 years ago

      True, but hey, assholes will be assholes.

    • MercAaron

      11 years ago

      Not your fault. I am just not going to deal with them any more. I don't care what they think. They are immature and I am not going to deal with that. I have made up my mind. Also, I am still gunna talk to people like you, Knight, Chris, Adam, and Walter, but Amanda, Josh, and Caboose pissed me off.

      Also, wouldn't you get irritated if you became the bad guy in a situation like this?

    • InsaneDC

      11 years ago

      sent the invite to the team.

    • freelancer92

      11 years ago

      Yeah, but you're not bad ass awesome.

    • BirdPhobia

      11 years ago

      and yeah aha, I can't wait for that

    • BirdPhobia

      11 years ago

      "Mmm chicken wings"

    • GaussCannon

      11 years ago

      I know, it sucks, lol.

      You know that was awesome, and was +1 Funny, lol.

    • GaussCannon

      11 years ago

      It sucked, because I got burned like I knew I would.

    • i_r_caboos

      11 years ago

      No. I've been way more excited for other things.
      Halo 3 is one of them.

    • GaussCannon

      11 years ago

      I'm doing that tomorrow, i think.

    • Nitro288

      11 years ago

      Thanks, and your welcome. Good to know that what I've learned, i can spread out to my online friends. smiley1.gif

  • Questions

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