Darkstrife

Male
from In the oven known as the South-west

  • Activity

    • 7 years ago

      Darkstrife
    • Recipe for Success

      7 years ago

      Darkstrife

      You know, I'm not even going to try to understand government anymore.

      Now I live in California, it's well know the US economy is in the crapper and we're pretty close to the bottom. Naturally most people with half a working brain want to get us out of it. Seems logical right, jobs=money=happy people. College fees are hiking up daily so naturally we want to flourish so those can come down.

      Now I've just read about a new bill in the newspaper. Apparently the governor and all his infinite wisdom decided on this:

      "Mr. Governor how do we help higher education? Should we pour some money in from the several useless projects we're doing?"
      "No, no, I have a better idea."
      "It must be brilliant than sir."
      "It is, let's give illegal immigrants scholarships!"
      "Sorry Mr. Governer, but what. the. fuck."

      So apparently illegal immigrants can apply for scholarships if they are on the way to becoming legal. Suddenly the whole political system is working on the fucking honor system.

      So i tried to put my anger aside and look at it logically and I'm just bewildered. How does this help anything?
      It's like they're purposely trying to see how low we can go without us rioting and destroying Sacramento.

      Luckily several officials seem to have a working brain and are working to overturn it as soon as possible.

      A summarizing quote, "More than 80-90% of voters oppose this act." I FUCKING WONDER WHY!

      -Can we have Schwarzenegger back? He didn't do anything but he was funny and didn't Robin Hood his own people.
      -Darkstrife

    • I'm loving me some 1.8

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      Minecraft 1.8 was supposed to come out of Monday but they pre-released it on Friday, now I can go on for pages about exactly how awesome this is so I'll keep it brief.

      Abandoned mines are awesome but I keep getting lost.
      Blue spiders are a pain in the ass.
      New terrain looks much more realistic.
      New bows are amazing.
      i love the new stone, much more ascetically pleasing.
      So now I will make a Hillfort with the new stone till "real" 1.8 comes out.

      it's finally cooling down here so I actually got to sleep with sheets last night, feelsgoodman.

      Also always remember 9/11
      -Darkstrife

    • Ramblings of a Lunatic 1

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      Not much happens in my life news wise so instead I will occasionally broadcast a piece of what goes on in my head on a particular day.

      Today's topic: Understanding Twilight

      Now most of you know and hate Twilight, (the movies in this case, nobody can force me to read a book.) But I tried to look at the other side for a moment, why is Twilight good? I've concluded Twilight is porn for women, now if you will follow me for a bit...

      -Both are based on extremely dubious circumstances, a vampire falling in love with any particular teenage girl is probably as plausible as the pizza delivery guy finding an extremely horny model as a customer.

      -One person is a toad compared to the others, does anybody pay attention to the pizza guy? No. Do Twilight watchers notice anything besides Taylor Lautner's abs? No.

      -Someone's trying to cover someone else's ass, The model tries to ignore the pizza guy's impotence with a massively fake orgasm. The vampires try to cover the protagonists uselessness with more abs and picking a fight with vampire Mafia.

      -Ridiculous happy endings, the pizza guy doesn't get the shit beat out of him by the models boyfriend and the vampire mafia just decides to go home after traveling thousands of miles acrossed the ocean instead of getting down to business and killing people.

      -Clothes magically disappear, camera pans away from a clothed werewolf/vampire, suddenly no shirts, then suddenly the pizza guy is naked, then the model's naked, and the clothes are no where to be found, WHERE THE HELL DID THEY GO!

      My mind then spiraled down to applying quantum physics to clothes, something that should never be done. Then I took my calm pills and I was fine again.

      So in conclusion, Twilight is the women's version of porn, as the sticky seats in the movie theater prove to me, luckily I brought a bag from smuggling in candy...

      -Hopefully you had a laugh,
      -Darkstrife

    • Notch reveals some of 1.8's new features

      in Forums > Notch reveals some of 1.8's new features | Follow this topic

      Darkstrife

      Ign got a video up of Notch demonstrating some of 1.8's new changes.

      Take a look.

      Creative mode's coming back and we now have a brightness slider I'm ecstatic about, the color options for the Mac are really dark and If i got caught out at night with no torches I was screwed. Now hopefully I'll be able to see.

      All in all it looks awesome, Endermen are creepy and I can't wait to find an abandoned mine :)

      3 replies

    • Dear Rich

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're a Leprechaun. I think I realized it when your dog humped my leg under the bus and I saw you hit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're sterile enough to understand you need a sex change. I'm returning your nose hair clippers, but keeping your mom as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet, sweet ass and the apartment building is on fire.

      Go drown yourself

      I nameth thee 4chan generator, now with 80% less racism



      Here's the template,

      Dear (Person of Choice),
      I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8), but keeping (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
      (12)

      1) What's the color of your shirt?
      Blue - I'm in love with your cat
      Red - Our affair is over
      White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
      Black -Our romance is over
      Green- Our socks don't match
      Grey - You're a leprechaun
      Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
      Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
      Brown - The mafia wants you
      No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
      Other -I dislike your eyelashes

      2) Which is your birth month?
      January - That night you picked your nose
      February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
      March - When your dwarf bit me
      April - When I tripped on peanut butter
      May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
      June - When you put cuffs on me
      July – When I saw the purple monkey
      August - When you smacked my ass
      September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
      October -Last year when you peed your pants
      November - When your dog humped my leg
      December - When I finally changed my underwear

      3) Which food do you prefer?
      Tacos - In your apartment
      Chicken- In your car
      Pasta - Outside of your office
      Hamburgers - Under the bus
      Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
      Lasagna - In your closet
      Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
      Seafood - In a clown suit
      Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
      Pizza - At the mental hospital
      Hot dog - Under a street light
      Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

      4) What's the color of your socks?
      Yellow - Ignore
      Red - Put whipped cream on
      Black - Hit on
      Blue - Knock out
      Purple - Pour syrup on
      White - Carve your initials into
      Grey - Pull the clothes off
      Brown - bit of
      Orange - Castrate
      Pink - Pull the pants off of
      Barefoot - Sit on
      Other - Drive over

      5) What's the color of your underwear?
      Black - My boyfriend
      White - My father
      Grey - The Catholic Priest
      Brown - The Montreal Canadians' goalie
      Purple - my corned beef hash
      Red - My knee caps
      Blue - My salt-beef bucket
      Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
      Orange - My Blink 182 cd
      Pink - Your "My Little Pony" collection
      Other --The elephant in the corner

      6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
      One Tree Hill - Senile
      Heroes- Frostbitten
      Lost - High
      Simpsons- Cowardly
      The news - Scarred
      American Idol - Masochistic
      Family Guy - Open
      Top Model - Middle-class
      Annat - shamed
      House- Sterile

      7) Your mood right now?
      Happy - How awful you are
      Sad - How boring you are
      Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
      Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
      Depressed – That we’re related
      Excited - That I may pee my pants
      Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
      Worried - That your Ford sucks
      Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
      Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
      Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
      Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
      Other - That your driving sucks

      8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
      White - Your toe ring
      Yellow - Your love letters to me
      Red - The pictures from Vegas
      Black - Your pet rock
      Blue - The couch cushions
      Green - Your car
      Orange - Your false teeth
      Brown - Your nose hair clippers
      Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear
      Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
      Pink - The cut toenails
      Other - Your balls

      9) The first letter of your first name?
      A/B - Your virginity
      C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
      E/F - Your neighbors dog
      G/H - The oil tank from your car
      I/J - Your left ear
      K/L - The results of that blood-sample
      M/N - Your glass eye
      O/P - My common sense
      Q/R - Your mom
      S/T - Your collection of butterflies
      U/V - Your criminal record
      W/X – Your suicide note
      Y/Z - Your credit cards

      10) The last letter in your last name?
      A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
      C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
      E/F -Never will forget that night
      G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
      I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
      K/L - Hate your cooking
      M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
      O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
      Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
      S/T - Love your sweet, sweet ass
      U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
      W/X - Haven’t showered in a month
      Y/Z – am better off without you

      11) What do you prefer to drink?
      Wine- Our friendship is ruined
      Soft drink – I love Oprah
      Milk - The apartment building is on fire
      Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
      Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
      Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
      Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
      Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
      Whiskey - I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
      Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
      Other – you should stop picking your nose

      12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
      Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
      France - Love always
      Spain - With tears of sadness
      China – You make me sick
      Germany – Please don’t hurt me
      Japan - Go milk a cow
      Greece - Your everlasting enemy
      USA - Best of luck on the sex change
      Egypt – Kiss my butt
      England - Go drown yourself
      Italy - Please, don't lick my inner thighs anymore

    • To all those Maniacs who beat Touhou

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      Now add another dimension.

      I thought I was good at games but now I feel like a hairy retarded Gorilla again.
      Damn I need to shave.

      -Darkstrife

    • Notch reveals new 1.8 mob

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      Notch revealed a lot about a new mob he made, since most of you don't like spoilers I'll hide it.

      It's tall, thin, and dark and looks like the "Slender man" meme from Somethingawful, Normally they move blocks around passively
      BUT when you look at them, reticle on them they freeze...and stare back at you.
      Neither of you look away and as soon as you look away....it charges you very fast,
      oh and they can also teleport once per second,
      sweet dreams kiddies.

      800px-2011-07-26_18.14.06.png

      And you suddenly realize they are the minecraft version of:
      Them.

      Brb not blinking, ever.

      -Darkstrife

    • Holy crap

      8 years ago

      Darkstrife

      Notch revealed a lot about a new mob he made, since most of you don't like spoilers I'll hide it.

      It's tall, thin, and dark and looks like the "Slender man" meme from Somethingawful, Normally they move blocks around passively
      BUT when you look at them, reticle on them they freeze...and stare back at you.
      Neither of you look away and as soon as you look away....it charges you very fast,
      oh and they can also teleport once per second,
      sweet dreams kiddies.

      File does not exist.

      And you suddenly realize they are the minecraft version of:
      Them.

      Brb not blinking, ever.

      -Darkstrife

  • Comments (312)

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      actually its both.

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      kk here you go www.mediafire.com/?lmndjzxy4do

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      i just downloaded "iron attacks" new album "vampire concerto" you want?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      ok its just a little gadget that monitors your system activity and has some animation to display it

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      you dont know what the system animator is?

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      LOL oh wow!

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      LOL I didn't know you get paid for it!

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Same here! It's been so chaotic!

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      alright, well i love looking at computers so i can look up a good one for you if you want

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      if your looks for a cheap pc you should get a net book. they're cheap, come with wireless internet support and are pretty small

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      sry im so late talking on msn

      ok try running in compatablity mode
      right click exe file and under the compatabilty tab

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      kk but i need to restart swr upload

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      no

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      ufo ill upload swr now

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      heres the download www.megaupload.com/?d=EV091JYN
      2 big for mediafire

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      kk ill upload now though

    • gi_goku FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Keeper of Tacos

      9 years ago

      I know what you mean

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      would it help if i teach you to read binary

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      yeah its an install program

      double spoiler has pallet compatibility problem I'm to lazy to fix so I cant play it :/

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      torrents arn't illegal only downloading copyrighted material (unless thats what you mean)

      you wont learn if you dont try (you have no idea how many computers I've broken XD)

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      just get bootcamp to run windows

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      I have a feeling that, thats directed at me

      Post edited 3/30/10 2:44AM

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      in the end its like playing as reimu or marisa and if you want to throw sakuya in for linux

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      Mounty Oum joined RT staff? shows how much I've been keeping up

      anyway from my experience macs are better for digital arts like video editing and drawing while pcs have a more open script making them good for business because custom software is easily made for it, now me not being an artist you can see why I prefer pc's

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      if it means anything I would use a pc like that too

      and i dont have anything against macs its just funny how the fanboys flame each other

      Post edited 3/29/10 7:35PM

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Cool! My bad on that! I was gonna write in the journals as soon as I got a chance to read them.

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      i myself am a shutin but I've never compaired myself to patchy

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      you wernt an putdoorsy person or not happy about the role switch?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      well i might try it atleast once but i'm not a very outdoorsy person

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Hey! Sup!?

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Did you get my character data?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      cant mosst of that be done on bootcamp?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      I know i was pokin fun at you a bit...sry

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      have you tried windows 7 yet

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      have you seen the death star destroy the enterprise?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      well it was funny till i reliezed it was directed at me
      then I reilized that it wont end well

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      the hong effect, havnt heard that before.
      well guess I'll have to see how it plays out

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      well IRL i specialize in unarmed to armed combat.....but against danmaku i dont think that will help

    • katern

      9 years ago

      yes yes they r and here i thought that it would end like kimkiss rouge i didn't see that coming

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      yeah I know what your talking about, I just havnt found redeads scary since OoT. Unless your talking about link I which case yes they are
      humping link, I wonder if the internet will ever let that go?

      and I need to go to my computer class in 20 minutes so if you want to talk you'll need to get on lunaticred

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      Zelda ftw, but the only game I ever founf the zombies scary was OoT
      and I'm just wondering what to put in the next comic

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      hey whats you up too

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      are you gonna post part two of the fanfic?

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Hey! I made my character outline. Should I just send it through a private message?

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      I didnt know that rule had a number. rule 9 if it exists there IS touhou fanart of it

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      alright well ill look forward to reading
      btw we'r in the same time zone XD

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      hey you did delete it
      remember not to make any one part to long you dont want it to drag on

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      yeah i noticed that you didnt go into pachys discription
      and when your telling koa about our world you should point out that magic doesnt exist here anymore

    • halogameralx

      9 years ago

      band logic made me lol
      and yeah I should stop procrastinating on my story too or I'll wind up going another month with out a post

    • MackG64

      9 years ago

      Oh yeah! You guys are definatly on my friends roster!

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