I haven't made a journal in a long time...
I mean a really long time...
i herd u liek mudkipz?
9 years agoGrifRocks209
Found this somewhere on the internet.
1. The shotgunner must be in clear sight of the car, and shotgun can be called regardless of whether the driver is in sight of the car
2. If you are the first to be picked up on a journey you are automatically given shotgun. You retain this position for the entire journey, unless you violate rules 11, 16, 22 or any other rules stipulating the loss of shotgun.
3. You cannot declare shotgun if someone has previously declared shotgun for that journey.
4. When simultaneous shotgun is called, there is then a foot race to the passenger side door from all the people who called.
5. Shotgun cannot be called whilst inside a building (unless you are in a multi-storey or underground car park!)
6. Shotgun cannot be called in advance, only whilst on the way to the car for the journey.
7. Once shotgun has been called the driver has the option of a reload. The driver yells Ã¢â‚¬Å“reloadÃ¢â‚¬Â and this means that all previous calls of shotgun are void and the first person to call shotgun again gets the seat. This is helpful if the driver really doesnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t like the person who first called shotgun. It is often used when there is a simultaneous call and the driver is unsure of the outcome. Note that a shotgun has only 2 barrels so a reload can only be called once.
8. Once shotgun has been called for the front seat then back left and back right can be called. This effectively leaves the slowest person to travel in the middle (of the Ã¢â‚¬Å“b**chÃ¢â‚¬Â seat).
9. Because everyone is created equal, men have the same right to the front seat of the car as women (ie women don't own the front seat!).
10. If the regular driver of the vehicle is drunk or otherwise unable to perform their duties as driver, then he/she is automatically given shotgun.
11. Once the journey has begun, the driver is the obvious controller of the tunes. However if they feel the road requires their full attention, or they simply cannot be arsed any more, duty is passed to the shotgunner. However putting on crap tunes or allowing for silence when the iPod finishes a song or ANY instances of TAKE THAT will result in demotion to b**ch seat.
12. Anyone calling shotgun must have his or her shoes on. This is to stop people running outside and calling shotgun, then having to go back inside to put their shoes on and slowing the journey. This is known as the Shoe Rule.
13. Shotgun overrules Dibs, Baggsies and other girly calls!
14. Despite the debate, shotgun CAN be used to shotgun things other than the front seat (eg back left, back right, women, not going to answer the door, etc).
15. When travelling with a couple, one of the couple MUST shotgun the front. No one wants to chauffer two of their mates whilst they are in the back all over each other.
16. If someone has successfully called shotgun, they have the right to the front seat. They do not have the right to correct the driver on their navigation skills ("take a left here you dickhead!") or driving ability ("I'd be in third gear if I was driving"). If the passenger does this, then they forfeit their position as shotgun holder.
17. If someone says, "whatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s shotgun?" after it has been called then they have to walk.
18. If the shotgunner attempts to open the door just as the driver is unlocking it and jams the lock half open so that the driver needs to lock it and unlock it again, the shotgunner forfeits their position. This is known as shotgun suicide.
19. The holder of shotgun assumes the responsibility for all gate opening, off license nipping into, takeaway ordering and question asking. He/she is in essence the copilot and therefore the enforcer of behavior in the vehicle and exacter of slaps/punches/water spraying/bag throwing at the passengers in the back.
20. Automatic "couple's rights act 1997". This law states that, if the driver is the boyfriend/girlfriend of a passenger in the car, this person has the right to the seat of their choice.
21. If one of the potential occupants of the vehicle is dressed (convincingly) as a pirate then they are given automatic shotgun. In the event of more than one pirate being present, a sword fight shall determine the successful shotgunner. This is known as The Pirate Rule.
22. When driving past a woman walking a dog, everyone in the car must shout out the window, "who's walking who?Ã¢â‚¬Â It is the shotgunnerÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s responsibility and failure to spot potential heckling, results in demotion to the b**ch seat!
23. When riding in a 2 or 3 door car, it is the responsibility of the shotgunner to allow rear passengers in and out of the back of the car, NOT THE DRIVERS!! Regardless of the weather conditions.
24. Obviously the previous rule on the subject didnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t clarify things completely with everyone coming up with a new rule that over rules shotgun. NOTHING overrules shotgun. Shotgun is final and cannot be overruled!!!!
25. It is the successful shotgunners responsibility to be on the look out for any police and/or speed cameras. if the shotgunner doesn't spot a speed camera and this results in a speeding ticket it is immediately their fault and not the drivers.
On Thursday Valve released the community update for TF2. Here are 3 weapons they released so far:
Unlockable Pyro Melee Weapon
+100% damage to buildings
-25% damage to players
Unlockable Soldier and Demoman Melee Weapon
+1 capture force
+10% vulnerability to bullets
Unlockable Heavy Food Item
Heals 50 HP and extends maximum health to 350 HP for 30 seconds.
9 years agoGrifRocks209
Found this joke in a thread, it made my day.
FOR ALL THOSE WHO IRRITATE YOU---
-----take it out on someone, but don't take it out on someone you
know. Instead, take it out on someone you don't know.
I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd
forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered,
I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn
Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right f***ing
number!" and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that
anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to
call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two
After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again.
When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an asshole!"
and hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it,
and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying
bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an
asshole!" It always cheered me up.
When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole'
calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi,
this is John Smith from the telephone company and I'm calling to see if
you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?"
He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him
back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!" and hung up.
One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking
spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I
had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting
for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign
in his back window, so I wrote down his number.
A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I
had his number on speed d ial), I thought that I'd better call the BMW
I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?"
He said, "Yes, it is."
I asked, "Can you tell me where I can see it?"
He said, "Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax. It's a
yellow rancher, and the car's parked right out in front."
I asked, "What's your name?"
He said, "My name is Don Hansen."
I asked, "When's a good time to catch you, Don?"
He said, "I'm home every evening after five."
I said, "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?"
He said, "Yes?"
I said, "Don, you're an asshole!"
Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial too. Now,
when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.
Then I came up with an idea. I called asshole #1.
He said, "Hello."
I said, "You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up this time.)
He asked, "Are you still there?"
I said, "Yeah..."
H e screamed, "Stop calling me."
I said, "Make me... !"
He asked, "Who are you?"
I said, "My name is Don Hansen."
He said, "Yeah? Where do you live?"
I said, "Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, a yellow
rancher, I have a black Beamer parked in front."
He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don, and you had better start
saying your prayers."
I said, "Yeah, like I'm really scared, you big asshole", and I hung up.
Then I called Asshole #2.
He said, "Hello?"
I said, "Hello, asshole."
He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."
I said, "You'll what?"
He exclaimed, "I'll kick your ass."
I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over
right now." Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying
that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd, in Fairfax, and that I was on my way
over there to kill my gay lover.
Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in
Oaktree Blvd. in Fairfax.
I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax. I got there
just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other
in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a
NOW... I feel much better.
Anger management really does work.
Okay, so yesterday, I spent 11 hours pre-loading TF2 for the Free Weekend. Today I install it with anticipation and joy. I launch it, The valve logo displays and then...
It shuts down. It then redirects me to a page saying "Thank you for playing. Now buy this game!"
Anyone knows how to fix this?
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