On order of BEN I am making a new journal... Although I have nothing of any importance to say...
Hmm lets think....
I'm back with the asshole (whose not being an ass anymore)
I'm dating a striper
I'm taking her to prom
yea thats about it...
13 years agoHeartfeltLie
School started back up two weeks after the incident, most of the people not saying much to each other leaving the school abnormally quiet. Yet the quietness was calming somehow to each person in a different way. In Rachel's first period class no one talked much but the people who did talk went out of their way not to say a word to her. Rachel spent the whole period zoning in and out of reality, but she realized she wasn't the only one doing so. J who sat facing her right in front of her was zoning out as well, he seemed so out of it. Rachel wanted to ask him what was on his mind but before she got the chance to the bell rang. She grabbed her stuff and hurried off to her next class without a second thought. In the hall she passed a lot of her friends but for some reason none of them would make eye contact with her but she couldn't understand why. Second period started off about like first period had, the teacher announced at the start of the class that they had a free period to do as they wished but she wanted them to keep it down to a low roar.
Rachel yet again started to daydream through the class period like she had done the period before but was brought back to reality by someone sitting down in the seat beside her. Looking over she saw Kayla sitting there looking down at her shoes, Rachel smiled and looked at her waiting for her to say something. Kayla stayed quiet for a moment trying to gather the courage to speak, then took a deep breath and began "Rachel, wow I'm really not sure what to say but I'm sorry about Meya I really am. I know that nothing I say can make it better but I just wanted to let you know that well, IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m sorry.Ã¢â‚¬Â Kayla went silent as Rachel gave her a confused look "what do you mean you're sorry about Meya"?
Awkwardly Kayla searched for words that could explain what she wanted to say without coming right out and saying it. Finally she found what she hoped were the right words and made the attempt ".Her being gone and allÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ What IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢m trying to say is that I'm sorry that she's gone". Rachel smiled and laughed a little. By now the rest of the room was silent in anÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ almost shocked worried kind of way. Rachel looked at Kayla like she was out of her mind and laughed, "She's not gone, sheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll never be gone. SheÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s just sleeping thatÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s all". Kayla along with the rest of the room was at a loss for words, they just stared on in disbelief at Rachel not knowing what to say or do as she smiled and wiped the tears from her eyes refusing to let a single one fall. Rachel turned her head away from them to stare out of the window beside her, whispering under her breath silent enough for no one to hear her Ã¢â‚¬Å“Good-night sweetness, I love you.Ã¢â‚¬Â, As a single tear rolled down her cheek.
13 years agoHeartfeltLie
Suddenly Meya squeezed her hand from behind causing her to snap back to reality. She zoned out and forgot to pay attention to what was going on. Quickly she turned to face Meya to see what was the matter and saw tears streaming down Meya's face. She didn't want to look at the ground where MeyaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s eyes were locked. She didn't want to see it, whatever it was, but she knew she had to. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath the slowly started to turn her head reluctantly towards the ground. As soon as she saw what it was, who it was, she fell to her knees. She felt as if she were going to be sick, every muscle in her body tensed at the same time, and she couldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t breathe. One of her best friends was just laying there on the blood stained floor cold, lifeless, dead. Meya wrapped her arms around Rachel from behind and started whispering in her ear trying her best to calm Rachel down like Rachel had tried to clam her. Unlike RachelÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s attempt, MeyaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s worked. Slowly and almost reluctantly Rachel laid back into her. After a minute or two Meya slightly pulled Rachel to her feet and took her hand.
"Baby doll, come on it'll be ok but we gotta go" Meya whispered talking as softly as she could not wanting to draw attention to the hallway they were now in. Rachel nodded to her and squeezed her hand gently. So far they had knocked on every door in the hallway and no one would answer. They both knew there were people in the rooms but the people were too scared to answer the door in fear they it would be the shooters instead of someone needing help. The next hallway wasn't too far away from them and they could slightly hear noise behind them, unusually loud footsteps, so they sped up still trying to stay quiet enough not to draw the attention of whoever was in the hallway behind them.
Turning the corner they were right in front of the entrance to the school and consequently right in front of the large glass doors, which was one place they really didn't want to be. Suddenly one of the glass doors shattered right in front of them scaring the hell out of Rachel, causing her to jump a few feet back. She lost her balance and started to fall; trying to grab Meya as she fell Rachel now heard footsteps coming down the hallway right behind them. Her arm was now placed around Meya's waist because she had tried to catch her as they both had fallen. Pulling Meya up with her she attempted to move both of them out of the hallway, trying her hardest to get away from the people she heard coming.
The closest room that would possibly have just a few people in it was the speech room. Rachel started to stand up but was waited down by Meya. Looking over at her she saw that MeyaÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s eyes were closed and her white shirt was slowly turning red with every breath she took. Rachel shook her head and smiled, sometimes Meya could be so messy; she must have gotten ketchup on her shirt at lunch. Yeah that was it she had just gotten ketchup on herself and must have been exhausted from all that had happened today, she was just sleeping. Rachel repeated that in her mind over and over. Meya was just asleep. Rachel once again tried to stand wrapping her arm tighter around Meya so she could lift her up as well.
Once she had managed to stand she propped Meya up against her. "Come on sweetness please wake up we gotta go" Rachel whispered softly in Meya's ear but she showed no reaction. Again Rachel heard the threatening footsteps coming up behind them. Quickly moving underneath the staircase next to them she tried to hide Meya and herself from the people, which seemed to work relatively well. Rachel felt something warm and wet on her hand, looking down she saw it was covered in red. She went to wipe it on her shirt but noticed it to was drenched in red as well, and so was her Meya. Meya was also getting cold; Rachel silently took off her sweatshirt and wrapped it around Meya as tightly as she could. Smiling she ran her fingers through Meya's hair and whispered to herself "Sleep tight sweetness itÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll all be ok, I love you".
As soon as she was sure the people were gone she wrapped her arm around Meya once again and lifted her up off the ground. Standing up with all her strength Rachel got out from under the staircase and headed towards the closest room to them. She was barely strong enough to carry Meya in her arms but she managed to. Ã¢â‚¬Å“Grr brat this would be so much easier if you would just wake up, I know you're tired but come on you could have waited a little wile longerÃ¢â‚¬Â she though silently to herself. Rachel finally reached the doorway, leaning Meya up against herself she quietly banged on the door hoping someone would answer.
Just as she was about to give up and walk away to the next door it slowly creaked open just enough for an eye to peer out at them. As soon as the person saw who they were the door was opened and they were both quickly pulled inside. Someone Rachel didn't know grabbed Meya from her; Rachel's first reaction was to grab Meya before the person could take her. Though as Rachel went to grab her back another kid cut her off pushing Rachel's arms down gently trying to let her know it was ok, but Rachel was completely confused of too why they were taking Meya away from her.
Without even bothering to think about being quiet Rachel spoke out "She's fineÃ¢â‚¬Â¦ isnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t she?Ã¢â‚¬Â she took a slow breath Ã¢â‚¬Å“She's just asleep that's all, right?" Rachel paused as she saw them gently lay Meya down on the floor and listen to her heart beat. As Rachel watched the kid who had grabbed Meya out of her arms before look up at her she started shaking her head no and continued saying "she's sleeping .she's asleep! She has to beÃ¢â‚¬Â¦" she repeated it over and over again for at least two minutes until she didnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t have the breath of ability to say it anymore.
13 years agoHeartfeltLie
Rachel closed her eyes as she heard yet another series of gun shots sound off in the distance. She was standing there backed up flat against a wall shaking. She could feel Meya trembling beside her crying, even though she tried to muffle the sound. Meya curled up into a ball slightly propping herself against Rachel's leg. Her arms wrapped around her legs and she buried her head into her arms trying to keep control of her thoughts. The sound of gunshots once again faded out; opening her eyes Rachel took a deep breath and shook her head attempting to rid her ears of the sound.
She couldn't believe this was happening she didn't want to believe it, but there was no denying it was true. Looking down at Meya who still had her head buried in her arms Rachel reached her hand down and ran her fingers through the girlÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s hair a few times trying to calm her down a little. Realizing it was no use she stopped and pulled her hand back. She couldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t stand Meya being so scared, all she wanted to do was hold her a reassure her it would all be ok. The problem of this was she wasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t entirely positive that it would be.
Wondering why the gun shots had come to such anÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ abrupt stop she inched a little ways away from the wall to glance down the other hallways beside where they were standing. As she looked down the hall she saw plenty of people, none of which were moving. There was blood splattered on the walls and pools of blood surrounding the lifeless bodies of all the people she knew. She closed her eyes trying to block out the scene but even with her eyes closed she could see it fresh in her mind and she could smell the blood of the people who were once so close to her. Opening her eyes again she glanced down the hallway once more, she heard Meya whimper behind her and she quickly turned around coming face to face with her.
Meya had been standing not even a foot away from her and was now close enough for Rachel to smell her hair and feel her breath on her skin. She was trembling from head to toe with tear stained cheeks and more tears swelling up in her eyes. She looked absolutely terrified which wasn't normal at all for her, and scared Rachel more than anything she had witnessed today. Meya wasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t that type of person; she was always the optimistic one who thought she could take on the world if it came down to it. The girl standing in front of Rachel wasnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t Meya, she was a completely different person and Rachel wanted nothing more than to make her feel safe at that moment.
Moments before they had watched one of their best friends die directly in front of them, which had Meya really shook up. Rachel didn't know what to feel... she was just lost. There was no other way to describe what she was feeling besides just utter confusion, she was numb to the point that she could no longer feel any part of her body, and her mind was in almost the same situation. There was too much going on, too much in her head, to much right in front of her that she just didn't want to see or even acknowledge. Looking at Meya she couldn't help but smile, the rest of the world could be gone and yet if she still had Meya everything would be ok. She reached up and wiped a tear off Meya's cheek then ran her fingers through Meya's hair and whispered" It'll be ok baby, I promise".
Holding each other's hand's they started to walk down the hall looking for a classroom that would hopefully have someone inside willing to let them in. Meya started shaking and shut her eyes tightly, almost violently, every time she saw someone lying on the ground in a pool of blood. Rachel on the other hand would shiver, take a deep breath and keep on moving. She desperately wanted to get out of the hallway before one of the shooters came across them or worse, before they could stumble across another one of their friends. Rachel didn't even want to think about that, she couldnÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t handle the thought of seeing another person she loved laying on the cold blood stained floor. It was bad enough that Meya and her had witnessed Doug getting shot and watched him die; she couldn't bare to see it again.
13 years agoHeartfeltLie
GIRLFRIEND APPLICATION :p
Why do you want to be my girlfriend?;
What do you look for in a girl?;
Which do you prefer girl or guy?
What's ur orientation?
What do you like to do for fun?;
What's your favorite type(s) of music?;
Are you religious?;
Have you ever cheated?;
Do you think you'd ever cheat on me?
Do you think dating a girl and a guy is cheating?
Would you ever lie about dating me to keep your sexualitly a secret from someone?
What's ur biggest pet peev?
If I'd let you call me by any name what would you call me?
Are you random or do you plan things?;
Would you want to stay home or go somewhere?;
What do you want to be later in life?;
Is sex important to you?;
If I didn't want you talking to someone would you still talk to them? (answer wisly it's a trick question =p);
If we were alone in a room, what would you want to do?;
If you were asleep and I called you because I was lonley and wanted to see you, what would you do?;
What made you want to fill this out?
Are you serious or no?
Here's ur chance to say anything else you wanna say so what's it gonna be?
No questions have been answered yet