Merlin_909X

Male
from Turtle Island (read history)

  • Activity

    • Fear is the path of the Darkside

      12 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      I am afraid...for the first time in my life I am truly afraid. Things are going so well that I'm finding things to be afraid of. Turns out that they don't exsist and I'm completly making these things up. While it's true that a lot of my fears are based on real things. There is a lot of unrealistic veiws on the reality of the situation. All I can see before me is destruction and pain. Is it finally coming to an end?
      Or are my views on reality being altered for the better? This fear is stopping me from doing somthings I really would like to do.
      What can I do to overcome it? Life finds a way and I will not let this fear consume me I will fight.; I will not fight to accept the fear to say so what lighting never strikes twice. It's not nearly as bad as I think it is. It won't be as bad as I fear it will be. To be adrift at sea,
      Does not mean certain death, there is in fact a chance for life. Depending on how bad you want it you will find it, what are you willing to sacrifice for it ? That struggle makes you all the more powerful. The past is somthing you can't run from or you'll end up running in circles. You have to turn around and face it if there is any chance for you to survive. Learn from the mistakes of those around you, make your own and learn from them. I will not fear the darkness to come I will let it wash over me and look it in the eyes, become a part of it. and in that let the light I know to be there permeate the shadows. I am speaking of love.
      Do not fear everthing will be alright.
      Merlin

    • It's not the Destination it's the Journi

      12 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      So my years of Tequilla drinking and uncommiting relationships with women have finally caught up with me.(No it's not what your thinking,I think...All the tests were negative) I have finally come to the conclusion that it's not as much fun as you think You may all come to this same conclusons at different times you may not whatever I don't care. But searching for that one (If they do exsist) is quite a challenge. No kidding it's actually work. I wouldn't have it any other way though; it's also kind of fun.
      Women are Strange and Wonderful Creatures. I just hope that when the times comes I can do the right thing.
      I'm in the Middle of Financial MAth Homework so I've completely lost my mind at this point.
      Later Days,
      M

    • I'm in Class Right Now...

      12 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      I'm currently sitting through a boring pointless lecture and we are currently being sold on somthing that I will have no use for it's discusting F&^$ing Texts are so expensive

    • So long Sweet Summer

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      SO.... It's been along time since I've wrote anything and I've had a fantastic summer and it's also made me a little sad that it's had to end I've met some of the greatest people I've ever met in my entire life. I'm not even sure what to say I doubt they will ever read this.
      Everyone is moving on and I myself have gone back to school again this time in another city not way from the people that I've met but we all have to go our seperate ways.
      I have moved up in the world at least I feel better about where things are going and I figure if I keep doing what I'm doing things will be ok. I will miss all my friends that I've made over the summer I guess that's all I'm trying to say it sounds a little thrown around then we'll too bad. Peace out to all my summer friends may our paths cross frequiently
      School School School must prepare for school

    • See you on the otherside*

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      It's been along time since I've had anything to right about It's been an interesting few months to say the least. I have reached a point in my life where I feel I know who I am and my potential. I've seen somethings in the last little while that have helped to define the person that I want to be. I have a clear vision of where i've come from and where i want to go.
      for the first time in a long time I feel confident in myself and my ablities.
      It's not the kind of confidence you gain from others. It's a feeling I can trust and it came from me. And that's pretty fucking cool. I feel as though I've surpassed those around me not in a cocky I'm better then you sorta way I just feel unrestricted by there opinions because I trust my own now. It's an interesting feeling. To illistrate: When Vegeta goes super saiyan for the first time. Why Vegeta and not Goku? I always got the sense the Goku was born to it and Vegeta had to work for it. And when he reached that level it wasn't because he had to or people wanted him to but because he wanted to. For the things that he loved and worked for. Not because the world needed it. Although he was always up for a challenge and did stand up for those he cared for when he was needed. The point is that when he did it it was on his own terms Because of that I feel that he IS the strongest saiyan of the two. Anyway sorry for geeking out on ya.I've crossed a bridge and for those of you who read this and know what I'm talking about cool. and for those of you who have yet to arrive. see ya on the otherside.
      *(I was listening to the new Korn album when I wrote this and it seemed like a fitting title
      Props to the band please don't sue me...)

    • Rage or somthing like it

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      OK so maybe I'm a little pissed off today I have no way of really saying why it just seemed to creep up and grab me it was quite unexpected then again so is everything, I suppose I'll just have to deal with it. Nothing seems to be going right these days
      School sucks and I really want to go traveling and enjoy myself for once in a long time but I have responsibilities here at home and there isn't really anyway around this so I'll just have to bite the bullet and wait I guess.
      It is really nice outside today. I'll go see if I can enjoy it and hope that this feeling passes As it always does.
      I think I'll go and have a mini adventure. Like pretending to be a Jahova's witness and see how long i can get people to go along with the idea, or shipping a big screen TV to someone else's house using someone else's credit card.
      Or ordering food and then leave before it comes out. Or by a bunch of moives and then return them all in the next instant.
      Or telling some hot girl that she's hot and get her number then give it to a lesbian friend of mine.
      or a have six shots of tequilla and fly the piolt simulator a school. Or go to a recording studio and make a two minute track and try to sell it as some supersatar album. Or jump into other peoples pictures.
      This is already cheering me up
      Later,
      Merlin

    • Roasted Duck

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      I had rosted duck for dinner last night.
      I was REALLY good and I can't remember the last time I had a meal this good.
      Finals are over and I can breath a sigh of relief. That girl I was going to ask out turned me down and now I have to nurse my wonded ego...Yeah right that girl doesn't know what she's misising. I rule.
      Spring left this morning apparently it didn't like it here.
      All these girls want from me is a quite one nighter. Where have all the good girls gone?
      Ladies if you wish to coment on this please do so help me regain my faith in the good ones.
      Xmen 3 comes out in less then a month
      I'm off to watch some RVB
      Later,
      Merlin

    • Are you Red or Blue on this?

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      Good morning,
      After much diliberation I have finally choosen a side...
      Drum roll please!! /:|.......Red, Yeaa... and for those pollitical wack-a-doos out there I'm not talking about the different states.
      I am of course talking about the show that we all know and love. My reasons if any of you care are simple.
      The Red army rulez and if I were there which I'm not and I mention this to let everyone know I am perfectly grounded in reality .
      Anyways. If i were there I would like to meet Tex in battle she sounds hot...I know we'd hit it off. "Does it bother you that the most take chage person in our unit is a woman?"-Some Blue army wuss. I love Wome who take charge.
      Finals are practically over and It's time for me to leave the Scholarly world and go back to the "we don't give a shit how sucky your life is you live to make us money" "real world" grind that is my life. For now...
      I believe this will be a tempoary settlement and isn't always, I know I'm not the first person to say this.
      I won't be the last. I just looked up from my console in the library and there is the hottest girl sitting at this computer across from me. I think I'll ask her out.
      What a great time to be a Man
      Shout out to Tex if she reads this.
      Wish me luck,
      Merlin

    • Finals

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      Awake by Jim Morrison
      A good song, and an even better poem.
      It's been a good day so far, full of preoccupation and doubt.
      It's amazingly beautiful outside the sun is in full force today.
      As I write this many beautiful women ar passing by in very attractive sping wear.
      where did they all come for this is awesome.
      It's very quiet and I am contemplating what my next step should be
      Finals are nearing a close so I have to choose what do I do next.
      Stay in school or travel the world. I can't quite decide.
      I find myself missing old friends and wishing that I had spent more time with them when I had the chance
      I'm not all that great at expressing myself I hope she understands.
      I've always wanted to go to New Zealand I've seen pictures and it's absolutely beautiful.
      Nature at it's finest.
      Ah well back to work ,
      I can't wait to see what is going to happen with the Marvel civil war
      It looks to be one of the most interesting premises since death of superman
      Way to compare rivals huh...
      What would you want to see?
      Later,
      Merlin

    • Field Medics Log Terren Date 004.70141.6

      13 years ago

      Merlin_909X

      Ok so I watched Star Trek last night sue me...
      Hello everyone and welcome to my first journal entry
      Today it is raining and I am visting family for the weekend. It's been pretty uneventful today and I am looking forward to going home
      Back to the women I know and love. Yes that is more then one and I am not techniqualy in a relationship so ladies, don't hate the pickel hate the garden. Alright so I need to contribute something so here it goes.
      What is the most fasinating thing about the women in your life??
      For myself it would have to be the strangeness of it all.
      I meet so many different women on a daily basis and they are so incredibly unique
      Some are down right manly, and I mean it in a way in which there sex drives are so enhanced that they are as hungry as I am
      more consistantly then I am too. Others are shy and sweet though i know that there is a really wicked dark sense of humor and I have to say some of the things I have heard shy girls say make me laugh so hard I go incontinent.
      Others are down right sneaky and manipulative got to give them credit for how they work. They make today' s politicians seem soft core.
      I love it
      Alright so that's it
      If your going to comment on this then Iwould like you to add something good about the women you know
      try and make it interesting not lame ie "my chick gives good... and so on
      Ladies say something good to the guy in your life.
      That's my time,
      M3r7In

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