If I were to look for a movie that violated every Law of Vampirism that was ever set down by Anne Rice or the guy who wrote Count Dracula, it would be this. This disaster, this trainwreck, this blasphemy to original vampires, this lawsuit waiting to happen, was so awful, that I had to come here to bitch and complain about the utter audacity of its creators.
First of all, the acting. The girl was a horrible actress. She was overly emotional at all the inappropriate times, and she bored me. Then there's the male "vampire", who, he and his family are one, dating each other; and two "vegetarians" which means they only drink animal blood because they want "normal lives". The aforementioned "vampire" was a horrible actor as well, being that he was under-dramatic and seemingly unfeeling (granted, yeah, he's supposed to be a vampire, but if you're going to violate the Laws of Vampirism you might as well go the extra fucking mile and give him a bit of a personality).
Second, the blasphemies. There are a few, but the most mind-numbing was the vampires's ability to stand in the goddamn sun without being burned. But wait, there's a catch! When in direct sunlight, their skin becomes sparkly. SHOCK HORROR! The exchange of words between me and my dad went like this: "Oh look dad, his skin is diamondy" to which he replied "God I know. Make some rings."
Now the plot. Awful. How many times can you rewrite Beauty and the Beast? The whole story was basically some girl who "fell in love" with some gay vampire, and nothing good happens, they play baseball, some cool black guy vampire with dreads shows up by a drag queen and a fat ugly bitch, cool black vampire warns the family (once again, just for clarity, the family dates each other), gay vampire kills drag queen, fat ugly bitch is nowhere to be found (probably off in the forest getting mauled by a bear), and then the movie's over.
I think my biggest problem with this movie is that the writers show no regard to the original vampire. A vampire is a horrifying, marauding, godless killing machine, not some punkass emo kid.
Case in point, fuck anyone who enjoyed this affront.