Zankaru

Male
from Florida, US

  • Activity

    • ~*~ Rules of Life ~*~

      in Forums > ~*~ Rules of Life ~*~ | Follow this topic

      Zankaru


      Ive been interested in doing this for a while, and having more people to discuss it with will be a help. I would like to make a list of rules and guidelines for life in general. If you disagree with the one's listed below, or have ones to add to the list, please explain the reason for it. Atleast two people must agree on a rule for it to be added.


      1. Never lie to a friend
      *The reason for this is obvious, a friend is a person that we trust completely and who will stand with us through anything. Lying to a friend is a huge show of disrespect and can often lead to the relationship being ended completely. If you ever do find the need to lie to one of your friends, there is a high chance that you did something you should be asking their forgiveness for.



      Official List

      *none added*

      4 replies

    • Sweet Relief

      8 years ago

      Zankaru

      Done with everything now, finally. I turned in my application for the air force this evening and will be heading to MEPS on wednesday (next week), then its off to basic. Im so excited, im finally done with the eighteen year tutorial and can start leveling now! I am going to be in the airforce for the next twenty years and plan on getting to colonel rank asap. I havent decided wether I am going to go career and do thirty or more, and general rank goes hand in hand with that.

      Im so relieved about so many things.

      *I can let my inner perfectionist take over now that I will be doing something that is actually interesting to me. (referring to school)

      *I no longer have to maintain an anti-social mask with others now that I dont have to worry about not seeing them again. Just the idea of allowing myself to pursue romantic interest is enough to make me smile.


      Will be checking up on alerts and heading to the P&P group if anyone is interested.

      ~ZZ



      Book List



      Current reading
      *Book* Soul of the Fire by Terry Goodkind


      Planned reading
      1) Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
      2) The Foundation series by Isaac Asimov
      3) Dune series by Frank Herbert
      4) Age of Fire series by E. E. Knight
      5) The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon
      6) The Ghost King by RA Salvatore - * 25% complete *


      Reading Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy by Douglas Adams- December 2009
      6) The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - December 2009
      7) Stranger in a strange land by Robert Heinlein - Janurary 2010
      8) Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke - Janurary 2010
      9) Hogfather by Terry Pratchett - Janurary 2010
      10) The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents by Terry Pratchett - Janurary 2010
      11) Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - Janurary 2010
      12) Beyond the fall of Night by Arthur C Clark - Janurary 2010
      13) FanFiction: (Team 8 by S'Tarkan - 218,000w) (Nightmares of Futures Past by S'Tarkan - 371,000w) (Again by Kimcat - 87,000w) - Janurary 2010

    • Gone for a bit.

      8 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~*~*~

      Got to take another leave, not sure if I will have the time to get on and catch up on alerts before basic but if I can will do. Just too much stuff going on right now.

      Happy Janurary-Feburary-March all!

      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

      ~*~*~*~

    • ~*~ What is Evil? ~*~

      in Forums > ~*~ What is Evil? ~*~ | Follow this topic

      Zankaru

      (If anyone else joins thread, me and doc started discussing this in comments so im copy/pasting what we already have chronologically, in the first post. Feel free to share opinions unless you want to just skip down to the current post.)


      ~*~*~*~

      DocRossim - Glad to know someone else has the good/evil complex and it's not just me then.

      Zankaru - I think everyone has it, just in defferent ratios.

      DocRossim - Something I puzzled over for some time was this: What is the definition of evil? Is killing evil? And I realised that we must kill to survive in many instances -- kill to protect, kill to eat -- but I decided that the evil is in enjoying the act of killing, and this is why I don't like people who hunt for sport. Although I'm okay with fishing, because that's not so much about the killing as respect for the outdoors and passing on a skill.

      Zankaru- Thats true. I dont now how hunting would fit into my sorta-half-finished definition of evil. The farthest I have gotten is that people have mental, physical, and social territory. When you are kind to someone you increase their mental territory, this is 'good'. Evil is when you decrease another persons territory, like killing them or creating damaging rumors about people. I would guess that hunting falls under 'evil' no matter the situation because we decrease the animals territory (killing them or causing pain) while increasing our own (the food / physical). About defending yourself....hmm. Requires more thought for today...haha, I am not going to get to read a single page today, so many new subjects to ponder.

      DocRossim- The nature of evil: Hmm, you raise valid points. Although, reducing the territory of someone who is evil... would that be a bad thing?
      Yes, you're right, doing anything hurtful, with the intent to hurt, is an act of evil (I say with the intent to hurt because there are some things that must be said to help someone which will hurt them in the short-term). And yes, it's a lot to think about...

      Zankaru- A good question. I dont believe that a person can BE evil or good (gotta go change my quote now *sigh*). Everyone, no matter who they are will do good and bad things in their life. Also, I believe that it is the act that is judged and not the people in the situation. For example, a murderer does the most evil act there is by completely erasing a persons territory. Like clint eastwood said: "killing a man is a horrible thing, you take away all he has, and all he's ever gonna have." However, an executioner who kills that murderer is doing the same thing to the murderer by erasing his territory.
      Haha, you sound just like my mother, she brought up the exact same point, even used the same words. I agree with you on this, I believe that it is never the physical or mental act that is evil or good, but solely the intent. For example, when a child wants to climb a tree but you dont let him and he cries, you are restricting his freedom but with the intent to keep him from harming himself, so this would not be good or evil since it has properties of both.

      DocRossim- I disagree that no one is good or evil, there are and have been people who are, when it comes down to it, well intentioned and out to do good things, and there are and have been people who take great pleasure in the pain of others and who want only to empower themselves, and those are usually the people who say "there is no good and evil, only power and those too weak to seek it" -- because no one likes to think of themselves as evil.
      Of course, I would say that no one is born intrinsically good or evil. Some are born with a greater potential for malice, some with a greater potential for selflessness and kindness, but a person's experiences in life will likely be the key factors as to what they later become.
      I will say this though: I am not a good person. I do care, most of the time, but do not always act, and when I do it is usually because I say to myself "you should act" rather than acting as comes naturally, so I do good because I think it is what I should do rather than because I am a good person.
      And an act for which both the intent and the result are good cannot be classed as an evil act -- your analogy of stopping the child from climbing a tree is a good one: there is no way that this act can be evil, because it works to prevent the child harming themself and this is also the intent of the action.
      The execution analogy is more questionable: I would argue that killing the murderer is not evil, but could be conceived as wrong, but whether the executioner is evil depends on if he enjoys his work.

      ~*~*~*~


      (That is all there is so far. This is in no way a linear thread, if you have an idea related to the topic then drop it in, you dont need to stay 100% focused on what the last post was talking about.)

      2 replies

    • Zankaru, Version 8, Journal 3

      9 years ago

      Zankaru


      ~*~ Insane Week ~*~
      I know I am falling behind on alerts but I actually have a real reason for it this time! This week has been crazy so far and its only getting worse. School is ending on the 22nd for me and I need alot of things done before, or shortly after then. It is the first time I have ever used a to-do list in my known memory:

      1) Finish Online Course Module 10,11,12 before Janurary 22. (The 'fast-pace' plan for this would make this 5-7 weeks of work)
      2) Pass permit & license test before Feburary 1st. (could not get either with the grades I had, my first four years of HS have been mostly F's with some C's)
      3) Take ASVFAB test before Feburary 1st.
      4) Open savings account before Feburary 1st.
      5) Narrow down military job preferences to top three before Feburary 1st. (Need my ASVFAB score to do this)
      6) Get graduation letter signed by councilor & principal before Feburary 1st.
      7) Bring JROTC grade up from 'F' to minimum of 'B'.
      8) Train physically everyday until Feburary 1st, mandatory. (continue PT until leave date for Basic)
      9) Plan for feburary, this includes the following:

      I. Find out how long basic will be, how I will get there. (I heard it was in texas so guessing im flying)
      II. Find out if I can bring any books with me, how many, and how much time I will have to read.
      III. Find out what supplies I will need, like razors, socks, etc.
      IV. Find out where I will be going after basic and what supplies I will need, also travel plans.

      ~*~ Gaming ~*~
      *Laptop*
      I finally got news on my laptop, which broke again if I never mentioned it. I screwed up the motherboard somehow so my technician is calling the manufacturers to see if he can get any money for it. Right now though my poor laptop is sitting in the top of my closet with no brain. *sigh* I was wanting another one anyways, my old one had horrible stats.

      * Dragoran Zelladonii, Level 4 Spell-Lord *
      I bought a PC copy of oblivion with the two expansions a week or so back and am currently enjoying exploring the shivering isles. Sheogorath is my new favorite character in elder scrolls. Although I am getting morrowind once im done with the expansions. Ive done pretty much everything there is to do on oblivion. Ive mastered all melee and schools, except for hand-to-hand, reached level fifty before I rolled a new character, and ive beaten all the quest lines. (fighters, mages, D-brotherhood, theives (love the cowl to death), main story). Ive explored the entire map except a few corners in the mountains (freaking hate mountain and volcanoe paths/roads). Yes...I think it is past time I return home to Vvardenfell.
      .

      ~*~ Psych Group ~*~
      For those who are interested I have started a group, 'Psychology and Philosophy', but I wont be doing much with it for the next week-ish due to my other things. However, everyone is welcome to join and share your opinions / ideas.

      ~*~ Music ~*~
      Was curious to know if anyone listens to trance or techno?



      ~*~ Books ~*~

      *Discworld*
      I finally started reading this series thursday and am greatly enjoying the one im on, the humor reminds me alot of hitchikers guide, still not sure which is funnier though. Another thing the one im on is similar to hitchiker guide is that it reads way too fast. I only read during school hours the last two days and im already 3/4 done with it. Im glad pratchett wrote so many in the series already because im going to need alot. The library did have the first book, but it was taken out, so my only option was to grab what they had. Unfortunately it happend to be like, book 14 or something. However this is not the first time ive started mid-series, so im not all that worried. I had the idea of taking my kindle with me to basic and buying the books in order as I finished them instead of getting paperback copies, im just not sure if I can charge up my kindle there.

      Current reading
      *Book* Hogfather by Terry Pratchett


      Planned reading
      1) Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
      2) The Foundation series by Isaac Asimov
      3) Dune series by Frank Herbert
      4) Age of Fire series by E. E. Knight
      5) The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon
      6) The Ghost King by RA Salvatore - * 25% complete *
      7) Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - * 70% complete *
      8) Beyond the fall of Night by Arthur C Clark - * 40% complete *


      Books Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy by Douglas Adams- December 2009
      6) The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - December 2009
      7) Stranger in a strange land by Robert Heinlein - Janurary 2010
      8) Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke - Janurary 2010
      ~*~*~*~



      The cold is almost gone, its above the 50's again finally!

      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

    • Zankaru, V8, Journal 2

      9 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~*~*~

      Was wondering how many of you are interested in discussing psychological stuff like the essence of evil and good, or why people feel insulted when shown that they are wrong? If there are anymore people besides me, doc, and taco then I was thinking of making a group for it. Easier to have different threads for seperate topics that way.



      ~*~Strange Feeling~*~

      I dont know how to describe it. I feel angry, happy, tired, and ..... I dont know how to describe the other feeling, ive felt it before but.... its hard for me to care about anything right now. Like if I imagine someone chopping off my hand there is a few seconds where I dont care, then the emotions kick on. Very weird, *sigh*, oh well. Perhaps after some time thinking it over I will figure it out.


      ~*~ Cold Walk ~*~

      Today I found out why we created sweaters and jackets. Walked the three miles to school today and I loved it, however my skin most likely wants me dead now. It was around twenty degrees when I left with my t-shirt, by the time I got to school my skin felt like concrete and my hands lost all dexterity. I did enjoy looking at the ice fields in peoples yards who left their sprinklers on. One guy had ice spikes around his sprinklers about a foot high off the ground in big five foot circles. Definitely not doing it again though, I must have been slightly more insane than usual when I was out there and actually liked it.


      ~*~ Freedom ~*~
      I have the rest of this week and then one last week of school left and I am finally done. Taking a week or two to do nothing but train physically before I go sign the papers to enlist. I dont want to join and find out that, how lucky am I?, they are picking up people to head down to texas in a week. I am definitely not ready physically, I am crazy out of shape, heck, I can barely do a hundred pushups non-stop anymore. So definitely doing a ton of PT before I join up. Ive never spent an entire day working out so im curious as to what it will be like.


      ~*~ Religion ~*~
      Ive thought it over more, and ive come to the realisation that I do still Believe that there is A God, maybe even the christian God, but I dont see why I should worship a stranger even if that does mean its hell for me. Scary thought, im not sure if I wouldnt prefer hell for eternity over the alternative of oblivion, just nothing after death. I just cant imagine not existing in some form, perhaps its a side effect of being able to think and having senses.


      ~*~ Movies ~*~

      * Hurt Locker *
      Amazing movie, I would suggest everyone see it. I think this one was up there with 'Saving Private Ryan'.

      * Sherlock Holmes *
      I liked it, would watch it again. I havent read any of the books so I cant compare though.


      ~*~ Books ~*~

      * Stranger in a Strange Land - Robert Heinlein *
      This book is epic. You know how epic? This is the only book ive read that is above 'The Wheel of Time' series, which im sure many of you know is the series I measure everything I read against. Without spoilers, the main character is a man who was born on mars to a human expedition, shortly after the humans were killed leaving him to be raised by martians for twenty years before he is discovered by another expedition and brought back to earth. Basically it is a look at humanity through the eyes of an alien. It has changed my way of thinking completely, I think about why I do things or think things now with more logic than I did before.

      Books like this are what students should be reading in literature class, not fraking beowulf and romeo/juliet. What do those things teach you that is important to your growth as a person? Crap, nothing, thats what. I HIGHLY suggest that everyone check this book out.


      Current reading
      *Book* Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke

      Planned reading
      1) Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
      2) The Foundation series by Isaac Asimov
      3) Dune series by Frank Herbert
      4) Age of Fire series by E. E. Knight
      5) The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon
      6) The Ghost King by RA Salvatore - * 25% complete *
      7) Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - * 70% complete *

      Books Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy by Douglas Adams- December 2009
      6) The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - December 2009
      7) Stranger in a strange land by Robert Heinlein - Janurary 2010

      ~*~*~*~


      When will this cold weather in florida stop? I dream of the days when its above 30. Where is my wonderful 80 degree days? *sobs*

      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

    • Zankaru Zelladonii, version 7->8

      9 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~ New version, #8 ~*~

      (For those who dont know, my 'versions' are periods of time where I think a certain way, and I progress to another version everytime I begin thinking differently and changing my previously held ideas. I wont talk about my previous versions because I have come to despise them all.)


      Recently I have hit a huge breakthrough in my progression as a person, and have been questioning why I do everything. I have always had a huge fascination and need to understand why things happen related to nature and science, but this is the first time I have ever turned that amazing mind of mine back and looked at myself. Some of the discoveries were more life changing than others.

      ~*~ Incredible increase in willpower ~*~
      For the past few versions my definition for achieving manhood was when I am able to force myself to do my duties and carry out my responsibilities without much effort. Considering that in my first three years of high-school just thinking about what I would do when I got home would send me over the fence and on my way home, I think my definition / goal is a pretty good one. Last week, for the first time ever, I have been able to make myself do classwork instead of playing games. Some of you might think 'so what', but we are talking about elder scrolls here not some crap like tetris that you can only enjoy for like an hour at most. Obviously, however, I am still far, far away from my goal. This is the first progress I have ever had though, so my hopes are up. I am hopeful / scared of what might be responsible for this change. Against my cautious nature I experimented a little and thought of how I feel when I am doing something I dont want to, like my online classes, and 'crushed' that feeling. A few days later I did an entire module (same as a textbook chapter except more content) in one night and didnt get distracted the entire time. No luck so far in recreating the mindset that allowed me to do it so far unfortunately. Thinking of testing my 'crush' on other aspects of my behaviour to see if there are any noticable changes.

      ~*~ Loss of Faith ~*~
      Since a few hours ago I have been thinking about changing the biggest thing that defines my very way of thinking. It is not until this particular hour after I started to pray over dinner that I realized just how huge this decision would be. I am, as of today, no longer a christian. I wont go into the particular reasons to save me from typing another few hundred words.

      I remember someone once told me that religion gives people something to hold onto when faced with reality. That there is something that they know without a doubt is true and unchanging, that there is a God (I even still capitalize the name out of habit *sigh*) and no matter what happens in their life he/she/it will love them. I remember scoffing at this idea, thinking the people who believed that considered those who are religious weak. Now however I think they might have been right because ever since I decided to no longer Believe, I have felt like throwing up and a great urge to run away as if something was chasing me. Its really freaking me out because I do not understand the reaction at all.

      ~*~ Self Rules ~*~
      *sigh* I havent even thought about how this will change my behaviours or attitudes. I have yet to sit down and go over all my self rules and really think about WHY I do this or think this is wrong, and the thought that "It just is, worry about it later" and "Because I have always thought that and everyone else I know too" no longer are acceptable answers to anything ever again. The first one off the top of my head is "why is lying a bad thing?", this being pretty obvious as a first since it is one of the ten commandments, and though I have only pondered it a little while, I can only see that lying is not polite. Anyways I will still be holding my self rule of 'no lying' anyways as lying reflects bad on my reputation.

      ~*~ Nihilism ~*~
      I have been thinking like this recently and just discovered that it is an actual philosophy. So far it has only spread to my interest in art, as I began to wonder why I bothered with things like deviantart even though I am not an artist in any sense of the word. This led me to wonder why anyone bothered with art in the first place since art is always lost/destroyed/forgotten eventually. I can only think that I do it for the emotional reaction from the pictures I see, which is why I am no longer bothering myself with art as music is a much more powerful tool in influencing emotions.

      ~*~*~*~



      ~*~ My Addiction ~*~

      *Am welcoming book / series suggestions!*

      ~*~ Current reading ~*~
      *Book* Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - Book 4 of 11 - Secondary
      *Book* The Ghost King by RA Salvatore - Book 3 of 3 - Secondary
      *Book* Stranger in a strange land by Robert Heinlein - Book 1 of 1 - Focus

      Planned reading
      1) Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
      2) The Foundation series by Isaac Asimov
      3) Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke
      4) Dune series by Frank Herbert
      5) Age of Fire series by E. E. Knight
      6) The Shadow of the Wind by Carlos Ruiz Zafon

      Books Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy by Douglas Adams- December 2009
      6) The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - December 2009
      ~*~*~*~



      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

    • Depressing new year!

      9 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~New Year~*~

      I find it funny that hearing the word 'happy' multiple times in a day makes me the exact opposite.

      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~Doctor Who : The end of time part 1&2~*~

      Russel T Davies is definitely my favorite writer for DW, if you like doctor who and you havent seen this yet, you need to come out from under that rock you call a home!

      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~Books~*~

      *If anyone knows a great series, or even a standalone book, please do not hesitate to toss me a name!*

      -=-The wheel of time : The Gathering Storm-=-
      I will be the first to admit I was a little worried about another author picking up the torch jordan left behind, but sanderson did not dissapoint! The book was bloody FANTASTIC! There were only two things I didnt like about it. The first being the book focused on specific characters more than whats normal for a TWOT book. The second being that it READ TO QUICKLY! AHHHH! I swear, if sanderson was not working on two more TWOT books I would find him and kill him for the kind of cliffhanger he stopped the book at! *sigh* If I ever find an good author that writes each book of a series with 2k+ pages, I think I may die from joy overdose.


      Current reading
      *Book* Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - Book 4 of 11
      *Book* The Ghost King by RA Salvatore - Book 3 of 3

      Planned reading
      1) Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
      2) The Foundation series by Isaac Asimov
      3) Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke
      4) Stranger in a strange land by Robert Heinlein *50% complete*
      5) Dune series by Frank Herbert

      Books Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy by Douglas Adams- December 2009
      6) The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - December 2009
      ~*~*~*~



      In other news, ITS BLOODY COLD OUTSIDE! GAH!

      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

    • Merry Christmas!!!

      9 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~Yay gifts~*~

      I hope everyone is having a good holiday, I know I am! Got a bunch of stuff today, but definitely my favorite gifts so far were:

      *Most of the 'Sword of Truth' series by Terry Goodkind. (I asked for all of them except the first 3, already read those to death from library)
      *'The wheel of time' book 12, The gathering storm, by robert jordan and brandon sanderson.

      Would still be reading but I got to open 'the gathering storm' last night and I have already gone through a hundred pages and I dont want to finish the book quickly. So im doing all the boring stuff like sleeping, eating, and having contact with other humans. *sigh*

      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~Trouble upstairs~*~

      Well, I have run into some problems with my new 'memory crush' ability. (see 2 journals back, "you still have me on watch!?", for explanation if you missed it) I was playing around with it last night while trying to fall asleep and tried thinking of the first memory I ever used it on, (In one of stephen kings books a little kid gets raped outside a library, needless to say I dont read his books anymore) , and I had what I can only describe as a full body flinch. The muscles in my back and legs jerked and it was less than fun, thankfully it didnt last longer than a second, hurt like bloody ashes though.

      So looks like I wont be able to use that ability anymore because it is obviously doing something with my head. Just wanted to give anyone who thought of trying to copy it a heads up to stop.
      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~Alerts~*~

      Ive finally caught up with most of everyones alerts, except for doc and stonesword, and I dont know what to do with myself. Guess I will have more time to read now, or, exercise maybe.....nah, reading is funner.

      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~What im reading currently~*~

      Gonna start doing this again, trying to keep a list of everything I read and its easier to remember to add books to list when im doing it for journals.

      Current reading
      *Book* The Gathering Storm by Robert Jordan / Brandon Sanderson - Book 12
      *Book* Temple of the Winds by Terry Goodkind - Book 4
      *Manga* Historys Strongest Disciple by Matsuena Syun
      *Manga* Naruto by Masashi Kishimoto
      *Manga* Bleach by Tite Kubo
      *Manga* One Piece by Eiichiro Oda
      *FanFiction* Chunin Exam Day by Perfect Lionheart - 308,000 words - uncompleted
      *FanFiction* Fuzzy Logic by Deritine - 85,000 words - uncompleted
      *FanFiction* Konoha: Naruto's Playground by MegaB - 257,000 words - uncompleted

      Books Completed
      1) Wizards first rule by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      2) Stone of tears by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      3) Blood of the fold by Terry Goodkind - November 2009
      4) The Fire Eternal by Chris D'Lacey - December 2009
      5) The Hitchikers guide to the galaxy - December 2009

      ~*~*~*~



      Hope everyone is having a good time!

      ~Zankaru Zelladonii

    • Zankaru Zelladonii, age 18, version 7

      9 years ago

      Zankaru

      ~*~ Heads Up ~*~
      Just a heads up to yall who saw my last journal, I am going to be cutting off 'watch' on those who did not comment. This is NOT some diabolical plan to pressure anyone into commenting on my journals, I just dont have the time anymore-- (massive amounts of school-work, im actually planning to get in a semester's worth of work during the christmas break, only typing this journal because I want to get all this stuff down while I am thinking about it.)-- to check everyones alerts. I know, call me heartless if you wish. I wont be cutting off anyone after this though, so if you dont have the time ( or care enough ) to comment on my profile, dont worry about it.

      Whats this mean to yall? Hopefully I will be able to get cracking on those missed journals finally, soon, maybe. *sigh*
      ~*~*~*~


      ~*~Talking-about-myself-corner, incoherent and sometimes illogical, often jump subjects, ye be warned~*~

      For some unknown reason I have always been trying to label myself. Perhaps in an attempt to understand how my mind works. However I find it hard pinning down some of them as I seem to be.. I dont know, and thats the point really.

      * Im melodramatic, while at the same time considering showing emotion as an moment of weakness. Definitely confused on that one.

      * Im insane. For example ive recently become infatuated again, and when I try my hardest to not think of her I go a little crazy and start having those old 'go freaking nuts and start slashing at the nearest person with a large knife while laughing' fantasies.-
      (why do this you ask? well she is a freshman so beyond the obvious fear of pedophilia, and I do consider the 4 year gap to be that big, I will only see her until janurary and my brain says there is no point in starting anything when I know it cant go anywhere.)
      -Which I enjoy SO FREAKING MUCH, im struggling right now not to have one, its like...like being thirsty for weeks and finally getting water, or like staying awake for 4 days and finally sleeping, or having waited for something for years and finally seeing it happen. Its just wonderful and I dont even truly feel bad about having them I enjoy them so much, its other people and the bible that tells me this is wrong. Its as if someone told you walking on both feet was a horrible thing and you were supposed to hop on one foot everywhere. *sigh* I know I will never see a therapist or anything because I have the fear of being put into a psych ward for being a danger to those around me. If you think im over-thinking this, see the subject below this sentence.

      * Im paranoid. I also am very paranoid as things like watching both ways of a road while I cross it incase of invisible cars appearing to run me over, or people dropping poison into my food at lunch if I leave it alone this also applies to people giving me candy or anything else, or if I dont have all the locks in the house checked someone will kill me in my sleep, strangers walking on the same road as me could be planning an ambush and if anyone in front of me stops and lets me pass them they must be wanting to get behind me so I wont see an attack coming, are practically everyday thoughts to me. I could go on and on with my paranoia, but I think those few examples are enough.

      * Split Personalities : I consider myself evil while at the same time considering myself to be an exceptionally good person. (try to wrap your head around that one!) One of the major factors to this is explained in the *insane* subject above. Other things like having no emotional response to people dying, even family members I have known for years, and its thinking that I dont care about people dying makes me more sad than actually hearing about a death. I am incredibly selfish, while at the same time going out of my way to be polite, it drives me crazy because I am polite to everyone one day no matter what they do, and one day I hate everyone who even looks at me. I do'nt allow myself to get into fights while at the same time Im wanting to kill someone, I try my best to not lie to people and I havent stolen anything in years, and I dont use curse words except rarely.

      * I believe I am narcissistic, which is odd because even while I honestly do consider myself to be awesome incarnate, and that people should be bowing to me as I pass them, also now that I think about it ive never been impressed by anyone doing something. Anyways, I dont consider myself a genius only very smart, dont consider myself to be 'hot' but only average if not bordering ugly, consider my opinions to be important while at the same time not expecting anyone to share them.

      ~*~ All for this journal, im getting close to having enough words to write a story here, heh ~*~

      ~ZZ

  • Comments (2147)

    • DocRossim

      8 years ago

      Friends List: The list isn't in any hierarchal order, it's in order of who I met first.

    • TheForge

      8 years ago

      cool. SH has good stuff for military types most of the time.

      also, good luck at boot camp. I almost went boot for the navy before I got in an accident.

    • TheForge

      8 years ago

      Would you be interested in one of my two RPs?

      redvsblue.com/forum/viewTopic.php?id=2224925
      or
      redvsblue.com/forum/viewTopic.php?id=2225222

      also you should look into the S&D thread. (first post explains it.)
      redvsblue.com/forum/viewTopic.php?id=2222218

    • TheForge

      8 years ago

      by the way, do you RP?

    • TheForge

      8 years ago

      blue hair = black or grey in cartoons anyways.

    • TheForge

      8 years ago

      it's yotsuba. one of the few manga that's okay for children to read.

    • TheTaco007

      8 years ago

      Heheheheheh

    • DocRossim

      8 years ago

      I've been racking my brain to remember the other comedian I was going to say, and when I remembered, I just couldn't believe I'd forgotten...

      Bill Bailey.

    • DocRossim

      8 years ago

      I hope you enjoy them smiley1.gif

    • Red_Enemy

      8 years ago

      I used to have a huge list of proverbs, but I can't find the list as of late

    • DocRossim

      8 years ago

      Yes, yes, I am an Englishman, a Brit, a Limey.

      Hmm, Jimmy Carr is okay, sometimes a bit sarcastic but usually funny. I've not heard of the other two. I like Eddy Izzard (Engish comedian, known for partial transvestitism) Lenny Henry (English comedian of Black Carribean descent), Victoria Wood (northern English comedian, doesn't rely entirely on lewd and obscene humour like some other female comedians) and Dara O'Briein (very smart Irish comedian) and Billy Connolly (Scottish comedian, swears a lot and tells the odd crude joke but does so in a way that you don't feel offended in the slightest, very funny).

      Of American comedians... Hmm. Well, I quite like Jim Carey in some of his films, also Eddy Murphy, although I've not seen him in stand-up and I hear that he's a bit... adult in his humour when doing stand-up comedy. Rich Hall is often very funny, but I've seen Russel Hunter a few times on various shows and he's a real riot smiley0.gif

      I'll go over to the philosophy and psychology group soon as I get enough time, thanks smiley1.gif

    • Noozooroo

      8 years ago

      Yeah, like I meant that it was the first non-kids game I played that was challenging for a reason other than my ineptitude and lack of common sense.

    • DocRossim

      8 years ago

      Thanks smiley0.gif Yeah, I enjoyed making Laser Face. I just wish I knew someone who did a good impression of Burnie so I could make the whole song.

    • Noozooroo

      9 years ago

      Hell, Morrowind was my first ever serious game!

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      The group: Great! I'll join up smiley0.gif

      Dying in Basic: I know I would.

      Re-incarnation: I was of the view that a disembodied soul still trying to hang on to life might bond with a fairly new soul -- a baby, or even an unborn feotus -- at a stage where the soul isn't fully developed and might be more open to this process. Attempt at bonding at a later time would result in apparent possession of the living person by the dead person, or to split personalities.

      I have heard this idea of "The Light" being an effect of the brain shutting down, but there are also accounts of people having out-of-body experiences while in a coma or having surgery while technically brain-dead and seeing someone standing in the light telling them to go back because it isn't their time yet.

      Robert Rankin: Meh, I personally don't think the stories in his books are up to much. If you removed all the references to penises they would be about half the length. The books, I mean. I know this seems an odd thing to say from someone who watches Red vs Blue, but when you think about it, RvB only makes a few jokes now and again, and it's mainly harmless innuendo and not something you'd immediately visualise. But yeah, the current story is about a secret organisation that practices magic and cheats people from other dimensions out of their gold and jewels, a giant man-eating sprout from another planet who can telepathically inflict pain on anyone he chooses, a small grey thing that calls himself a duergar, but isn't one, because they're a type of dwarf and he's a strange slimey thing, and a couple of "heroes" who are about as lovable as an angry rattlesnake and whom you don't feel sorry for in the slightest, or identify with in the slightest, reading about their exploits. So no, I don't think he's worth looking up.

      Fanfiction: I've avoided fanfiction for a while now for two reasons: 1) there's so bloody much of it and you have to wade through a lot of rubbish to find the good ones, which I don't really have time to do these days and 2) a lot of it is just people pairing up a couple of the characters and writing them into a sex-scene.

      I hope you find some Discworld books, and that you enjoy them smiley0.gif

      Yes, poor Sorbet. His head fell off today. smiley2.gif

      Hmm, a mixture of the best parts of summer and winter? You mean, like, Swinter?

    • TheTaco007

      9 years ago

      *sigh*

    • TheTaco007

      9 years ago

      What are you, my therapist?

      Stupid shit. I'm back in my "No faith in humanity" mindset. Whenever I try to depend even the slightest bit on anyone but myself they screw me over. The weird thing is that I feel really unlucky most of the time. I mean yeah, my family is doing better financially than your average family, but when it's just me at school or something, I'm just the living definition of Murphy's Law. Everyone around me sees me as the smart guy who can skate through life, but in reality I'm trying to rollerblade through gravel. I mean sure, I know that I CAN deal with every single one of my problems on my own, but when I look around at everyone else who's helping each other, it gives me this weird sense of solitude. I try to be friendly and helpful to people, and what the hell do I ever get in return? I get "friends" who's only function is to occasionally whine to me about their problems (I say hypocritically as I do the exact same thing to you...) and make me do things for them. I honestly can't remember the last time someone did even something small for me, like picking something up that I dropped. I guess it doesn't help that all my interaction with people is via my high school, so they're all bumbling idiots, but still. It's fucking with my head.

    • TheTaco007

      9 years ago

      Unfortunately it's the not caring in a depressing way more than a care-free way.....

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      I disagree that no one is good or evil, there are and have been people who are, when it comes down to it, well intentioned and out to do good things, and there are and have been people who take great pleasure in the pain of others and who want only to empower themselves, and those are usually the people who say "there is no good and evil, only power and those too weak to seek it" -- because no one likes to think of themselves as evil.

      Of course, I would say that no one is born intrinsically good or evil. Some are born with a greater potential for malice, some with a greater potential for selflessness and kindness, but a person's experiences in life will likely be the key factors as to what they later become.

      I will say this though: I am not a good person. I do care, most of the time, but do not always act, and when I do it is usually because I say to myself "you should act" rather than acting as comes naturally, so I do good because I think it is what I should do rather than because I am a good person.

      And an act for which both the intent and the result are good cannot be classed as an evil act -- your analogy of stopping the child from climbing a tree is a good one: there is no way that this act can be evil, because it works to prevent the child harming themself and this is also the intent of the action.

      The execution analogy is more questionable: I would argue that killing the murderer is not evil, but could be conceived as wrong, but whether the executioner is evil depends on if he enjoys his work.


      V.A.T. is "Value Added Tax", which is a tax that applies to all items considered sundries or luxuries, and, for some reason, all clothes made for people above the age of thirteen -- I am calculating the amount that my father owes to the government from his business transactions offset against the tax he has already paid on items bought for use of the company.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Hmm, on a cosmic scale, and especially if humans continue to live as they do, the Nihalistic principle is true, but it would still be nice if we were at least courteous to one-another and showed some respect for the world around us -- after all, we want to survive for as long as we can, even if the world ultimately is going to end and the universe as well, the nature of all things is to strive.

      The nature of evil:
      Hmm, you raise valid points. Although, reducing the territory of someone who is evil... would that be a bad thing?
      Yes, you're right, doing anything hurtful, with the intent to hurt, is an act of evil (I say with the intent to hurt because there are some things that must be said to help someone which will hurt them in the short-term).

      And yes, it's a lot to think about...

      And I have VAT spreadsheets to fill in...

    • TheTaco007

      9 years ago

      Doc's right

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Triangles? smiley10.gif

      Snow Dragon:
      Thanks smiley1.gif
      The snow had become solid ice today, but if there is more snow I will try to make arms. I wasn't planning on doing open wings though, just shapes like folded wings on his back, but I did once give a snowman out-stretched arms by packing snow around thick sticks... but I wouldn't want your head exploding. That would just be messy.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Ah, schoolwork, the bane of teenaged life!
      Well, hope that goes well.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Yo-o!

    • Stonesword

      9 years ago

      Crashing is never "acceptable" but I have tolerated it when the game is good enough.

    • Noozooroo

      9 years ago

      You'll probably enjoy Foundation very much. I enjoyed it, but it didn't get me involved enough to keep reading it.

    • EliteinSkirt

      9 years ago

      Yeah that part was pretty interesting. He finally turns all badass and is like 'No u!' That was awesome. And the special effects were pretty legit, too. They usually are for Doctor Who, but they were particularly well executed here.

    • EliteinSkirt

      9 years ago

      Hrrrmmmm.... Youtube is tolerable, but I'm not crazy about the idea.

      Did you see Waters of Mars?

    • solicemoon FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold

      9 years ago

      Oh I've read the books I was just wondering what you thought of them. I didn't really think they where that dark but then again i just remembered the part in the first book where the one dude is forcefed his nuts so I guess they kinda are. The first few books are good though after a while idk. I won't go into any details but lets just say the series doesn't rank that high for me. Might talk about that later after you've finished the series. Don't want to taint your view or anything.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Well, like I said, it's not nougat, it just shares the malty taste of a mars bar, or of Horlicks malt drink, or of... something malty. A malt loaf? But crunchy.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Matlesers: they're not actual honeycomb, as in the stuff bees make out of wax, but more of an aerated biscuit, which taste malty, like the taste of the nougat in Mars bars, except light and crunchy instead of sweet and gooey, and they are very, very nice.

      If you like honeycomb flavour, there's also Cadbury's Crunchie, which is, again, an aerated biscuit, but it comes as a bar, and tastes like honey, covered in chocolate.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Sorry to hear you've been ill too. I've just been a bit stuffy and groggy, I hope you're not too bad.

      I might explain why my cousin is such a maternal-fornicating idiot in time, but not right now.

      Yeah, I hope the RT stuff didn't get lost too. If it's not here by new year I think I'll contact the service line and tell them the package hasn't got to me.

      Well, normally I'd have no idea what to get from my Mum, but this year she actually wanted an optical mouse because hers keeps gumming up, and I saw the calendar and just thought "she'll love this".

      We like nuts, and we are also all crazy, on both sides.

      Maltesers are small balls of malty honeycomb biscuit covered in chocolate. Made by Mars Brothers Incorporated, who also make Mars, Snickers/Marathon, Milky Way, Galaxy, Topic, Bounty, and Celebrations.

      There's not much math in the Shrodinger's Cat book, it's mainly the theory of the uncertainty principle and how it fits to actual real things like photosynthesis and DNA and stuff like that.

      How can you read three different novels at the same time? To quote Mr. Spock:"That will not work and would seem illogical to me, to me... to meeeeeeeeeeeee!"

    • Kairi15

      9 years ago

      of course i stayed
      i wouldn't leave just cuz u've been gone for a while

    • Stonesword

      9 years ago

      You can, at least with some games.

      One of my son's friends used to bring over his XBox .

    • Stonesword

      9 years ago

      Local Area Network - when you have a bunch of computers hooked up together

    • Noozooroo

      9 years ago

      Well, Okay then.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Another favourite moment of mine from the Hitch Hikers' Guide was Ford's conversation with the Vogon guard before he threw them out into space, that was great smiley4.gif
      And Slartibartfast: "Come, or you will be late"/"Late for what?"/"What is your name, Earthman?"/"Dent, Arthur Dent."/"You will be late, as in the late Dent Arthur Dent. It's a sort of threat, I'm not terribly good at them, but I've heard they can be most effective."
      Can't remember if that was in the film.

      Normality: Indeed, normality is entirely dependent on what is common, or average, but since various eccentricities are quite common, you could say it's normal to be abnormal.

      Manual Labour, reasons to dilike:
      - Dirt
      - Sweat
      - Feeling of extreme pain and exhaustedness at the end of the day
      - Lack of useful free time due to exhaustedness
      - Working outside in all weather, be it swelteringly hot or bone-freezingly cold
      - Back problems resulting from heavy lifting or bending a lot during digging
      - Heights (I get vertigo on the first story, wasn't talking about high-rises)
      - Lewd and ill-mannered colleagues

      Now you give me the reasons you like it.

      The other reason I stopped watching Bleach was because I didn't have the time -- I'm also having to watch it on Youtube, as no UK TV channels carry it. There was one channel that carried it, but it got closed down.
      In fact, the only Anime we get now is stupid children's shows that are really advertising for some strange Japanese toy range, video-game or card-game (Pokemon, Yu-Gi-Oh, that sort of thing)

      And the bookshop only stocks a few volumes of any given Manga book line, and there isn't a comicbook store anywhere near me.

      I find it odd that most Manga books are only line-art, when they could be colour, and the small amount of coloured Manga I've seen looks so wonderful and vibrant.

      And it was afternoon before I got to read you comment. Although I didn't end up going to work because of the icey roads -- one person I know from work ended up skidding his car into a roadside ditch, so the rest of us decided to give it up as a bad day.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      You know the real reason I don't like the manual labour is that, at the end of the day, I'm too tired to concentrate on anything -- like the machinima project I'm working on, or my artwork, or going through people's journals and answering the long emails I get from my friend Davis, or stuff like that. I've got hundreds of messages, journals and emails unread in my various user-accounts here, on D.A. skype and MSN.

      So, I'm going to go get some sleep so I can wake up at 7am tomorrow, I'll try to make time to read your latest journal sometime in the future, hopefully soon.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Glad you liked the book version of HitchHiker's guide (man, you read that fast) and the alien police officers are one of my favourite bits too! "I write novels, but I haven't had any published, so I'm in a mean mood!" smiley4.gif

      Anyway

      You enjoy manual labour?
      You sir, are one strange man.
      But then, I'm no picture of normality.

      Yep, life does kick my in the groinal area a whole lot, but hey, you make what you can of it.

      I find a fight scene that lasts more than two episodes gets... a bit boring. I liked the first series of Bleach with all the single-episode stories that linked up into one overall story-arc.

      Hey, what can I say? I appreciate that you went through as many journals as you did smiley1.gif

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Paypal: Yeah, worked it out in the end.

      Marley and Me: I highly recommend it. You need to watch at least one film in your life with no fight-scenes.

      Encounters: I see a surveyor every day; mammals of all sorts seem to gravitate towards me; yes, it was a thatched trailer, and building is not fun when it's in high places and involves heavy lifting; sadly, I may have to give up milk chocolate, as well as milk itself, because of my recently discovered lactose intolerance.

      Bleach: I liked the first three seasons, then it got a bit too "five episode fight sequences" for me.

      Thanks for all the comments! You really didn't have to go back that far in my journals. smiley1.gif

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      "I....think so. I know ive read like 4 of the books and I skipped the one they made into a movie."
      Dude, the Hitchhiker's Guide movie SUCKED! You should totally have read the original HitchHiker's Guide book, it was WAY better than the film, and the other books don't fit the same storyline at the film either.
      For instance: on pure aesthetics: in the books, Zaphods heads are next to eachother, Trillian is black, Ford is white and ginger-haired and wears this stripy suit and has this grin that makes the Cheshire Cat look like he's smirking and Slartibartfast is an old man who looks a bit like Moses (when he was old). Oh, and the Vogons are green.
      Technology: The Improbability Drive has a shield that stops weird stuff happening onboard the ship (like turning into wool); the Heart of Gold goes directly to Magrathea only stopping briefly to pick up Ford and Arthur from certain death, there are no random "we don't know where the hell we're going" bits where they end up in completely the wrong place.
      The Babelfish: there is a much better explanation of the little yellow translator fish.
      The storyline: Trillian doesn't get kidnapped, and she doesn't fall for Arthur, she stays with Zaphod. Nobody takes Zaphod's brain, Zaphod has always had two heads, but had his extra arm fitted, the ending is different, etc. etc. etc.
      Humour: the book is much funnier.


      Discworld: As I said, I highly recommend them. smiley0.gif Try to read them in order, although some of the earlier books arn't as good there is stuff that happens in them that will make later books make more sense. Like I said, there's a full list on Wikipedia in order of release.


      "Is it really that long?" Well, your journal wasn't all that long, I've just been busy a lot recently, and tired at the end of the day, and unable to read stuff longer than a few lines without wandering off.


      Post edited 12/13/09 7:46AM

    • TheTaco007

      9 years ago

      ..... You really don't read a lot of gaming news, do you? SC2 keeps getting pushed back because all Blizzard wants to do is fap on WoW.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      You're already read the whole HitchHiker's Guide To The Galaxy series, right?
      If you made the mistake of reading the fifth book, there is now a sixth book, not by Douglas Adams but in the same universe, set directly after the fifth book. Can't remember the name off hand, been wondering whether to get that one myself.

      Tried any Discworld books? They're good. The series has over 30 books, starting with the two-part story "The Colour of Magic" and "The Light Fantastic" and you can find a list of the rest on Wikipedia.

      I think you'll especially like the following:

      Guards! Guards! Men at Arms, Wyrd Sisters, the Death books: Mort, Soul Music, Hogfather and Thief of Time in that order. And you need to ready Wyrd Sisters and Guards! Guards! before you read the Death books, because some of the characters that appear in those books also appear in the Death books and are, in some cases, an integral part of the story. You may not like Small Gods, as it has parodies of the Christianity (the Omnian church that features is very similar to the Roman Catholic Church, except that the Great Om turns out to be just a rather small god, who nobody actually believes in anymore)

      And I would say that yes, there probably is a medical name for this thing you do.

      Erm, I think everything is covered in my journals me-wise.

      I've been waiting until I had time to sit and read your journal while fully alert, because of it's length. I'm not fully alert right now, but it doesn't look like that's about to change, so I'll go read it now anyway.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Heeeeeeey Zankaru, what's up m'good man?

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      You know, when I search "dragons" on the site search, your group doesn't come up.
      I think it's because of the "......." (the site sees "Dragons......" as one word)

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Note: do you know if the title of the group can be changed? It's jut that when I search "dragons" it doesn't come up, and I think it's because of the "......"

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      I added some of my favourite dragon pics to the group page, I hope you don't mind. smiley1.gif

    • Sparten316

      9 years ago

      yeah ill just kill my brother eventualy

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Apple's web browser -- you keep double posting, which happens a lot when using internet explorer and firefox on Rooster Teeth because the browsers seem to have trouble with the site. I use Apple's "Safari" web browser for Rooster Teeth because it loads the pages faster and I don't get any lag or accidental double-posts or the page freezing up or any stuff like that.
      I still prefer explorer for other websites though.

    • DocRossim

      9 years ago

      Dear Zankaru

      Get Safari, seriously.

      Also: TTYL means: "(Talk/Type) To You Later"!

  • Zankaru's Pictures

    There are no images yet. Create an album!

  • Questions

    No questions have been answered yet