_Pyromaniac

Male
from Finnland

  • Activity

    • I WANT...

      13 years ago

      _Pyromaniac

      While in the playground with his friend, Little Johnny noticed that Jimmy was wearing a brand new, shiny watch.

      "Did you get that for your birthday?" asked Little Johnny.

      "Nope." replied Jimmy.

      "Well, did you get it for Christmas then?".

      Again Jimmy says "Nope."

      "You didn't steal it, did you?" asks Little Johnny.

      "No," said Jimmy.

      "I went into Mom and Dad's bedroom the other night when they were 'doing the nasty'. Dad gave me his watch to get rid of me.

      Little Johnny was extremely impressed with this idea, and extremely jealous of Jimmy's new watch. He vowed to get one for himself.

      That night, he waited outside his parents' bedroom until he heard the unmistakable noises of lovemaking.

      Just then, he swung the door wide open and boldly strode into the bedroom. His father, caught in mid stroke, turned and said angrily. "What do you want now?"

      "I wanna watch," Johnny replied.

      Without missing a stroke, his father said, "Fine. Stand in the corner and watch, but keep quiet."

    • A DOG NAMED SEX

      13 years ago

      _Pyromaniac

      Everybody who has a dog calls him Rover or Spot. I call mine Sex. Of course, this has caused several misunderstandings. The following is a small sample of them:

      When I went to city hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, "I'd like one, too!" Then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like. Then I said, "You don't understand. I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He winked and said, "You must have been quite a kid."

      When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the hotel clerk that I want a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex. He said, "You don't need a special room. As long as you pay you bill we don't care what you do." I said, "Look, you don't seem to understand. Sex keeps me awake at night." The clerk said, "Funny, I have the same problem."

      One day, I entered Sex in a contest, but the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. "But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." He said, "Now that cable is all over the place, it's no big deal any more."

      When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, "Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married." The judge said, "This courtroom isn't a confessional. Stick to the case, please." Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said that's not unusual.

      Last night, Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?" I told him that I was looking for Sex. My case comes up Friday.

    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
    • 2019 years ago

      _Pyromaniac
  • About Me

  • Comments (14)

    • GigasViking

      12 years ago

      Cool you're into stargate! Speaking of that I've got an ancient language translator (english to 5000 year old cuneiform script) you might want to checkout in my journal. Effing sweet I think...and took forever to put together :)

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      wow I'm the only freind on smiley6.gif

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      thax! smiley0.gifsmiley1.gifsmiley8.gif

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      smiley5.gifsmiley4.gif

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      I'm no homo

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      Thanks!^_^

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      Right!

    • SupperNeub

      13 years ago

      The Pic is from a comic.
      But He goes on the show Invader Zim
      Here's were I got The Pic.

    • OKana

      13 years ago

      I saw it, i thought it was rather good. And thanks for the comment smiley0.gif

    • messenjah

      13 years ago

      thanks its really encouraging

    • Sarge2091

      13 years ago

      there you are

    • Sarge2091

      13 years ago

      where are you?

    • mastercaptin

      14 years ago

      award1.bmp

    • dancingtime

      14 years ago

      go to the "have questions? We ahve answers thread" in First Stop forum. all is explained there.

  • Questions

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