haku_sakura

Female
from a shadow embracing the light

  • Activity

    • CALLING ALL TNT CON MEMBERS!!!!

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      To all those attending look for me and give a shout out. I will be holding a booth selling fortune telling ask for my rates there. ^_^ Hope to see you all.

    • Dream 1: The Conversation

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      ..I had this dream around February just shortly after my birthday. I had been thinking a lot about him lately and kept praying we would talk soon. It was during one night I had a dream that seemed to be both granting that desire and telling me something.

      I was surrounded by a blinding yet blurry light and yet I felt so calm. It was then I could see that I was sitting in a chair looking at these words floating in a screen like an instant message. I took immediate notice of the person sitting across from me. Even though it seemed like miles, it felt only like inches. He also had a screen in front of him.

      You're
      probably thinking who is he?, well it's the guy I'm in love with. I thought he hated me and was ignoring me, but somehow this dream told me otherwise.

      He noticed me and we began talking. I have no idea what but it seemed like it was about anything and everything. All I knew was I was so happy to finally hear from him. Even if it was only for a second and it was only a dream. I still felt so content and very happy. He didn't seem the least bit upset or unnerved that I wanted to see or speak to him. It seemed in-fact he was very happy. I felt so relieved. I knew this wouldn't last much longer, but it seemed just as i was waking up and the dream was fading I saw him say something.

      I was trying to read his lips, but I couldn't he finally stopped and just smiled at me. I felt so happy and yet at that moment excited. I wonder though what was it that he was saying and why did I have this dream at all. Either way I knew I was happy and that is all that mattered to me at that moment. I finally got to talk to him.

    • 9 years ago

      haku_sakura
    • 9 years ago

      haku_sakura
    • 9 years ago

      haku_sakura
    • Dreams

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      ..we all have dreams don't ? Well I know I do the ones that seem so real you know that they mean something. They have to or else it means you're going crazy. I've been having a few recently. And I thought I ask before I post them up.

      Have you guys (girl or boy) had any dreams you feel have some sort of secret meaning recently? Do you feel you should think about them or let them go? If you decide to think about them, why? And if you decide to let them go, why as well?

      I feel this is something I need another's opinion on. At least one decisive one to help me decide where to go from at from there. I know this may not be something a lot of you care about or even wish to understand, but it's something that is on my mind. That I wish to discuss.

      Though I'm not sure how this will turn out. Either people will respond or they won't, but I hope the one that do. Are both kind, sincere, and honest in what they say. So I guess this is it for now until either no one post, or i post, or I don't.

      thank you and take care

    • I am in love, but am I loveable?

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      I am in love with some and have been for some time. I've questioned, poked, prodded, and even tried to ignore them. It failed each and every time. I was even told by a friend you must not really love him if you can't even tell him. It's not true I promise....it's just really hard. Let me explain it more clearly.

      Every guy I have trusted with my heart up till now has only broken it in the end. They all started out as the guy from my dreams; trusting, kind, gentle, and loving. Then it's like the clock struck 12 the magic fades and I can see them for the beast they are. Time and time again I would blame myself and say it's my fault I must have done something wrong. I'm not good enough, not smart enough, not even normal enough, or pretty. This goes from being bullied to be teased to harassed, and even betrayed.

      I lost faith in men and myself(mostly) as time went on. I became afraid to show the real me to even attempt to give my heart to another my reasons becoming repetitive. I can tell you it was not only my reasons that stopped me it was how I was treated each time. Part of them only cared about getting into my pants, part of them just did it for fun, part them wanted my best friend, part of them turned me into their mother, sister, or friend. I couldn't trust my own heart to them let alone trust their heart to me.

      It became worse with each guy until the last guy dumped me for an imaginary girlfriend. His family nor his friends know why or who and if she is even real. I just stopped and so it's been nearly over 3 years since I have dated anyone. Not longed compared to some, but my mother has been asking a lot lately.

      "When can I meet your boyfriend?" the only thing I can do is lie

      "Mom I don't have one I'm too busy for one." what a load of horse shit.

      But your probaibly wanting to hear more about the guy I do feel for now. Well like I said it's been a long time since I felt anything for anyone. Well when I met him it I can tell you it was the most amazing feeling in the world to know I had a kindred spirit. I dare not say anything I didn't want to scare him away. And anyways at first I felt friendships/kinship not more not yet. But each time we met it felt like someone was screaming jump jump come jump.

      I couldn't I wouldn't I was too afraid of loosing the friendship we had now over the small remote chance he even return a micro-scale of my feelings. I wanted his happiness above all. And now we are at current time I'm still being his friend and he still doesn't know. Maybe I really am a coward undeserving of love, but I can't help what I feel. I know it's love and until my heart achieves that love or moves on I stand by it. Thanks for reading and commenting if anyone does. Take care.

    • Oklahoma is white

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      because of a blizzard. it happened in a matter of hours and now it's too cold, too windy, and not too safe to drive. but i was able to work some hours and deliver some Christmas presents to my neighbors kids. i received two shirts, a candle, and a baby nursing shark in a jar. It was cool. ^_^

    • How is everyone?

      9 years ago

      haku_sakura

      I have not been on in ages and thought I see what everyone is up to lately? Me it's complicated, but hey what isn't? So anyways hope to hear from all of you soon. Love you all bye-bye

    • Check out my pics

      10 years ago

      haku_sakura

      I added some new ones. Some are titled (Sexy attempt) view and vote for your favorite here. At the end of when ever I choose the one with the most votes will become my profile image and will be given to those who want it. ^_^

      Though if you want you in essence can buy them as a set. Mod Price $ 5 mods per pic $25 mods total. ^_^ Thanks for reading this journal.

  • About Me

  • Comments (776)

    • nsm0220

      9 years ago

      www.petitionspot.com/petitions/OhMyGoddessTheGame and tell your friends about this

    • MetalPcAngel

      9 years ago

      i know its seen shit long, but its its good to see you again.

    • Endalio

      10 years ago

      hey just wanted to say hi and that i miss you :(

    • avatar260

      10 years ago

      hey im being nice and im at work

    • avatar260

      10 years ago

      its my sister

    • wil0087

      10 years ago

      how is u u got my space

    • wil0087

      10 years ago

      hi

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      Damn you give me back my jar of dirt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      You can take anything you want from me my dear. =-)

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      All I can say to that is OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And no that is not what is in the jar

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      no i don't have a heart that was taken from me long ago that is why a friend of mine calls me her heartless sensitive! But a good guess again keep trying!

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      nope but that is the funniest guess so far!

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      I will but you know you could keep guessing although when you find out you might be dissapointed and get mad at me so I warn you that what is in the jar of dirt may cause you to hate me.

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      Hey it happens to alot of people one day someone will guess it! =}

    • jesus024

      10 years ago

      Thanks for the pic comment but that is not what is in the jar of dirt

    • slayer232

      10 years ago

      u work at kfc thats sweet

      u should get me some chicken then
      lol jkjk

      love ther fried chicken thou

    • slayer232

      10 years ago

      wer u work

    • slayer232

      10 years ago

      yeah im don with that game umm was gonna get somethin to eat
      jkjk actually i still might

      but uh yeah that rlly sucks what u got
      try drinkin some orangejuice and like water/ramen with broth and u should feel better soon

      and of course those sinus medicine stuff

    • slayer232

      10 years ago

      whoz that and im just chattin and playin ffr

    • slayer232

      10 years ago

      hey wat u been doin

    • Zexion2552

      11 years ago

      care to chat?

    • Zexion2552

      11 years ago

      no problem....if you ever just need to talk coe to me. I have been though a lot despite my age.
      I am just tryin to help!
      Hope you find the someone!

    • Zexion2552

      11 years ago

      me too well expect of the comics...I have dial up...

      yeah I do know....I know all too well.....

    • Zexion2552

      11 years ago

      if you don't feel comfortable in talking about it you don't have to i am just trying to help, you not the only one who slips up like that

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      wats wrong

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      hey howz it going havent talked to u in awhile

    • wil0087

      11 years ago

      its just an expreshon

    • wil0087

      11 years ago

      yer fun fun

    • wil0087

      11 years ago

      o iv ben at work

    • wil0087

      11 years ago

      hays

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      u mean if u pay u can give mods

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      i mean cant

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      o but i meant u can give mod points anymore

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      i forgot what were we talking about

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      first won or secound

    • haku_sakura

      11 years ago

      i've seen that one and i love it

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      slayer2324824edca78b73t.jpg

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      my bad meant random picture or ones with the captions

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      so send u random message

    • slayer232

      11 years ago

      lol i thought it was pretty good i read the first comic for Lucky and i can not spell any of those names looks like it has alot of romance and comedy just the best way ta do it ^_^

    • BloodANGEL47

      11 years ago

      Lol, its cool. Thanks.

    • BloodANGEL47

      11 years ago

      Hope you accept random friend requests...cuz we have that "writing stories" thingy in common. Plus the anime...gotta love the anime.

    • ItsReimu

      11 years ago

      its been a long time

    • ItsReimu

      11 years ago

      hello there

    • 343winks

      11 years ago

      You are right. You are, I need to be more positive...I do...it's just....well like Daughtry said "I try to see the good in life, but good thing in life are hard to find"

      I just need someone to keep telling me to keep breathing.....

    • 343winks

      11 years ago

      I'm sorry......I'm sorry I am not stronger....*sits down against the wall with my knees to my chin* I am sorry I can't be your boyfriend....I am sorry I can't have confidence in myself....I am sorry I can't be perfect.

      am just tired of being alone.....I am tired of crying and having no one to hug me....I am tired of feeling so cold all the time.

      I just don't want to be alone anymore.....

    • 343winks

      11 years ago

      I know what you sre saying.....that I am pathetic because I am depressed....if I wasn't depressed, then I wouldn't be pathetic......bu it's so hard to not be......it's so hard to keep looking up when I keep getting beaten down for no reason.

    • 343winks

      11 years ago

      Steph is 27 years old. She already has a kid and everything........how about you date a 28 year old man who already has a kid? Not so easy is it? It's not my life and if I tried to join it, it would be like putting a square peg in a round hole

      When you spend your life the way I have....when all you ever get in life is bloodshed, pain, heartache, betrayal, abuse, beaten, told that you were nothing, ignored, hated for even falling in love, and treated the way I have. You come to think that all you ever deserve is pain. That your love is not worth anything in this world otherwise you wouldn't have been treated the way I have.

      It is easier to believe the bad news.

      Bi-Pagan said that every girl I have tried to love has been the wrong girl.....well I guess then every girl in this world is the wrong girl.

      Post edited 12/15/07 7:34PM

    • 343winks

      11 years ago

      a simple love with a complex touch

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