jackiebot FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold me irl

35 years old
Not Specified
from Savannah, GA

  • Activity

    • Ahh, Jeez... . .

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      Yeah, hi.

      Today is 1.12.08.. which... . if you'll look slightly to the left .. you'll see that this means i've been a member on this site for 3 years now.

      THREE YEARS!!

      *going out to get a life.. bbl*

      [and of course, by later i obviously mean very soon...]..


      But before i do.. so that your trip over here wasn't completely wasted... . two reasons why midgets are incredibly awesome:

      Reason 1:

      midgetlimbo.jpg


      Reason 2:

      badass8zz.jpg

      Good Day.

    • *Special Report!*

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      We interrupt this program for a Special Report.

      We received word moments ago that our fair city is under attack. The tiny assailants fell from the sky just hours ago. For more on this, we go to our Field Reporter, Jeanine Jensen. Jeanine?

      Thanks, Tom.

      At first, we were all captivated by the graceful way our visitors parachuted down from the sky. Their majestic appearance and elegant entrance did not seem to pose a threat. However, we were quickly surrounded by these tiny soldiers and realized their mission was not a friendly one.

      We caught this photo of the tiny soldiers floating down from the sky:

      tinyarmy.jpg

      Within just a few minutes, we were completely covered by these attackers:

      surrounded.jpg

      Scientists say they are "tiny ice formations created from certain weather conditions." From this, we can obviously deduce that they have razor-sharp extremities, insidious expressions, and malicious intent. As illustrated by the following artist depiction:

      evilsnowflake.jpg

      We advise our audience to STAY IN DOORS. Do not attempt to reach loved ones. If you walk out into this cold and bitter battlefield, YOU WILL BE DOOMED:


      civilianattack.jpg

      Back to you, Tom.



      Thanks, Jeanine. In other news: Jackie needs to buy a whole lot more winter clothes.

      We will keep you updated on this situation as events unfold. For now, we return you to your regularly scheduled program.

    • I Blame It On Slev

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      Oh noes.. my star. D:

      Eh.. Maybe i'll do something about it later.. as for now, it's not even 3 o'clock and i'm awake.. on my day off.. Screw this noise, i'm going to watch The Land Before Time [you read that right].. and nap.

      Before i do, though.. let's touch on the New Year's subject... . Personally, i'm very glad 2007 is over.. but I have no idea what to expect from 2008.. Hopefully more gummi bears.

      But let's hear what you have to say about it. How was 2007 for you -- as a whole? Any New Year's resolutions?

      happy new year's and stuff.


      Edit:

      Star replaced. I smiley12.gif a Dave i know, i know.

    • Batman > Superman

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      Debate of the ages.

      Although.. here, i offer PROOF!!

      Let's take a trip back to 1998... When Pluto was still a planet, and when Batman went to Metropolis, kicked Superman's ass.. and then stole his girl.


      Lex Luthor: "Haha. What makes you think you can kill Superman, when you can't even take care of a mere mortal in a Halloween costume?"

      The Joker: "There's nothing mere about That mortal."




      . . . .....and let's be real, here... . Superman was always kind of the douche of superheroes anyway.. .

    • Oohhh.. The Weather Outside is Frightful

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      . . ...and the fire is so delightful.. .
      But as long as you love me so.. .

      Let it -- Wait.. i Hate snow.. or anything having to do with cold.. and i only wish i had a fire place.. and the weather outside is actually quite lovely at the moment..

      Screw that song.


      Instead.. ITT.. We will further discuss the upcoming holiday season.. . Or, more specifically, YOUR expectations of it.

      I want to know what you want for Christmas/Hanukkah/Festivus/Whatever.. . . Even you strange little lurkers.. What is it that you want this holiday season? Include pictures, links, stories if you must..

      Don't by any means start thinking this means i'm getting you something for Christmas.. but hey.. you never know.. i have my generous moments [they're pretty few and far between, though..]..


      As for me.. i want this:

      01161101031101041220071122fd263752a82f08

      [i'm not even slightly kidding.. i WANT that piece of junk car.. So badly.. (i Don't want that trailer in the background, though.. smiley7.gif .. )..]..

      and a paddle ball.

      So let's hear it. Suppose there is a Jolly Old Fat Man wearing red, sportin' a beard.. what do you want him to bring you?

    • Happy Black Friday

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      24shop_slide1.jpg



      It's what the holidays is Allllllllllllllllllllllllllllll about. smiley8.gif

    • My Car is a Pimp.

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      I drive a REALLY beat up old car... i mean.. Reeaaallly beat up old car see for yourself [it's the one on the right.. . ].. I got it for free a few years ago, and i have every intention of driving the beast into the ground. She's such a big, beastly old car, that she came with the name "Bessie."


      But that busted old Cutlass sure gets a lot of presents.. .

      Last week, someone left a little purple rubber lizard on the windshield.. which i really wish i could find right now to take a picture of.. because he was such a cool little guy.. but i'm a jerk, and i've lost him already.

      Either way, the car gets a lot of gifts.. mostly jesus pamphlets, random notes, random plastic toys, and stickers.. like this one:

      everythingwillbeokay.jpg

      [the one that says "Everything Will Be Ok," not the NIN or Batman one.. those are my doing.. ]


      Last night took the cake, though... . My car received a big, giant bag of gummi bears with a little note that said "yay for gummi bears!!!" here is a picture of the gift:

      yayforgummibears.jpg

      I'm not sure who left it there.. I thought it might have been my boss, because it looks like his handwriting, but he swears it wasn't..

      And how my car can go from getting broken into and violated to receiving random CANDY on the Same, Exact street within 'bout a week and a half of each other is beyond me... .

      That car's just a pimp. Way to go, Bessie.



      EDIT:

      Bessie died. R.I.P. Bessie.

    • Really?

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      Name: Jackie Bagwell
      Company: Blue Ridge To Go
      Title: Office Manager


      ........ . . . .


      Current Task: Wrapping cookies individually in seran wrap........... . . . ..



      [No kidding...... . .]

    • Are You Afraid of the Dark?

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      No no.. not the "Midnight Society"... although.. that Was a pretty cool show for being a kids' show... .. in fact, Nickelodeon used to have a lot of cool shows.. what the hell happened?

      Anyway..

      Let me just mention that 3am in late October is the WORST possible time for All the power on one of the biggest streets in town to go out... . .

      Suddenly, without warning -- it was pitch black in my apartment.. not even street lights to shine in.. in an apartment FULL of creepy fucking Halloween decorations.
      My immediate thought was, "Oh no! I'm in a horror film! Where's the killer... . . . Where is Kevin Bacon to save me?!!"


      Although.. i will say that walking outside without all the city lights to drown the sky, looking up at the accentuated stars was kind of breathtaking.... .. .

      That was all.
      Enjoy your day.

    • Adventures at the Drag Show.

      11 years ago

      jackiebot me irl

      So... i have this friend.. and she likes to dress up as a man. Her name is Erin.
      Last week, she participated in a Drag Show [of Drag Kings, that is]..
      And i went down to cheer her on.. and of course, took a TON of pictures.

      All of these pictures will be linked... as a lot of them are very big.. and Especially because a couple of them kind of epitomize "NSFW"

      WARNING!!..: Some of these pictures include Partial Nudity.. If you are easily offended.. or in the presence of easily offended people.. DO NOT CLICK ON THEM.

      Let's start off by saying that this even, while it was women dressing as men, was hosted by Drag QUEENS.
      Burly ones.

      I got there late, but in time to see Erin perform a country song.
      And then she "brought sexy back" and pimped it a little while she was at it.. [that other girl in this picture is Erin's girlfriend, Yak].

      Other performers included:
      Some wegro dude[tte] singing "Candy Shop" and handing out lollipops..
      This rocker guy[girl, whatever.] whom i am Quite sure was mad at his dad..
      And then this other guy.. Who Dressed as a dude.. but then had this chick come out.. and act like a ho.. while guy did a whole lot of nothing. [CHEAP]

      And then.... okay.. and then this happened...... . . . . . .
      [this is my favorite part.. it's just too funny.]
      Disaster Starts.
      Disaster Rears its Ugly Head.
      Disaster Gets Comfortable and then... . .
      DISASTER STRIKES!
      Disaster Then Proceeds to Grab for the Ceiling... . . . .
      [no kidding]
      and then... .
      Oh God! Disaster's a Man!! smiley7.gif

      Then the contestants line up for judging.. .

      And Erin is named the winner! [that big, burly bitch wouldn't get out of the way...]


      After that, i spent the night dancing at the gay club with a bunch of cross-gendering fun-loving folks... . it was entertaining.. And while i did, unfortunately, get hit on by some Big, Scary chicks... . Any night that ends in me getting candy and free alcohol, is a Total win in my opinion.


      Also -- for ALL the drag show pictures, click here

  • Comments (7771)

    • Liselove

      10 years ago

      Lol, that's probably it. You do have a big personality

    • Ava_Adore

      10 years ago

      Jackie.jpg

      scanned & in better quality :D

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      The "ger" is supposed to be there. I just don't have it anywhere except on facebook. So unless you're facebook stalking me...

    • DSchneider

      10 years ago

      I am? What did I do? smiley12.gif

      Alternative response: no u

    • daruma

      10 years ago

      Hey qt, can you change the perpetual birthday thread for jenga? smiley12.gif

    • SupaChurchFn

      10 years ago

      It wasn't a bad breakup as breakups go, but it's still heartbreak. Thanks though, smiley12.gif

    • RoadBlock FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold DONGS

      10 years ago

      Whups! I fucked up. I can haz post edit plz?

      smiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gif

    • 1984

      10 years ago

      Thanks smiley12.gif

    • steph

      10 years ago

      UGH, the brackets in the item link make the RT link all borked.
      Here's the shop link.
      It's clay, shimmer-clay! <3

    • steph

      10 years ago

      I also love piratey things, do you?

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      I didn't realize exactly where "the show" was until I received my package. So maybe.

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      If you could eat some of this stuff we would totally be friends forever

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      Nope. The "ger" isn't there. LIES!!!!!!!!!

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      Really? Huh? I didn't realize that.

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      Also, where did you get my last name from? I meant to ask.

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      You will like what's gonna happen then. Grilling the red onion and avocado to give it a different flavor. Gonna post pictures to see how it turns out.

    • Fireball DRUNK

      10 years ago

      Thank you for the link. ilu!

    • Ava_Adore

      10 years ago

      well, I sketch 'em out, then take a picture of it with my phone, then when I get it on the computer I go over it all in MS paint, in a kind of scratchy way.

      I've always had a kind of half anime look to my art anyway though, so I guess it's he fact that I'm kinda trying to mix that in with realistic looking stuff.

    • ElWaldorf

      10 years ago

      inside joke actually. but its from the webcomic "the least i could do", the main character's niece calls him Unca.

      so hopefully i can make my new nephew to do the same.

    • puckplayer

      10 years ago

      I'm glad you remembered so quickly. It saves me a lot of effort from having to explain myself.

    • puckplayer

      10 years ago

      I have my hookups. And if the couple people I was going to ask weren't going to do it, I was just going to call Gus at home. And then Dan. And then Burnie.

    • puckplayer

      10 years ago

      I haven't.

    • Ava_Adore

      10 years ago

      do you!?
      It's my favorite one I've drawn so far.

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      Peanut butter pie sounds amazing.

      I actually learned about the whole shipping technique after a package got returned to me by accident. All the cookies I baked, carefully stacked, and placed in a box got returned, only for me to find I now have a solid cookie cylinder. I was surprised no one mentioned anything to me, so ever since, I have just gone out and bought like 8 of those Glad containers for $2-$3 and put them in there, then sent them on their merry way. So far I think the results have been better, but now with this new bread trick, I might be a winner for life!

      Did I mention they were delicious? If I invite you to a party will you bring those?

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      It actually arrived as one giant cookie. It was delicious though. The bread thing was something I'd never seen. I might implement it with my brownies if you tell me what's behind it.

    • kickcows GREEN IS THE BEST

      10 years ago

      I really like the drawing style you just posted in the ITT Draw RT Users, or whatever the thread is called. You holding the balloon is so awesome.

      smiley0.gif

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      Kitchen Midget? What if I cut myself in half?

    • DU_Stars_Fan

      10 years ago

      smiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gifsmiley12.gif

      I'll try to get everything out on Monday.

    • Ava_Adore

      10 years ago

      d'aww, you're gonna make me blush <3

    • Ava_Adore

      10 years ago

      your favorite?
      REALLY?

    • Cabose91

      10 years ago

      My mom, who uses Raising Arizona as her bible (named me after Nathan Jr. actually), had seen it once and wasn't all that thrilled with it. To her Raising Arizona was when the Coen Bros were in their prime. I thought B.A.R. looked pretty good but I never really gave it a chance. Although.. our humor is quite different at times.

      I'll try to get it soon!

    • Cabose91

      10 years ago

      Homicidal Christian Bale would always be a good thing to wake up to.

      You know, I haven't seen Burn After Reading, but I always see Brad on your profile and it makes me curious. Good idea if I watched it?

    • trefu

      10 years ago

      Huh?

    • nerdybella

      10 years ago

      Thank You!!!!!

    • sev_ered

      10 years ago

      ok, so i know you hate random video links. which is half the reason i'm doing this. but seriously.....trust me. it's so so worth it. i just hope you love them as much as i do

    • Cabose91

      10 years ago

      Hmmmmm... .. .

      Ain't nothin' but a silver dollah?

    • daruma

      10 years ago

      btw

      1062590926_0fce3b0fc6.jpg?v=0

    • steph

      10 years ago

      Whoops, I forgot it was 200 degrees outside, I'm all pink.

    • steph

      10 years ago

      I'm fairly certain that I am so white I glow, though. I could give Jackie a run for her money.


      I'm pretty sure that when Dave posts the pics from our date, this will be proven correct. <3

    • CalvnNHobbes

      10 years ago

      Oh my, I have received 4,992 mods. If I'm careful, maybe you can give my my 5,000th...

    • Psycholagny Resident of Old Olney

      10 years ago

      My hands hurt: a lot

      But it's all for love.

    • sev_ered

      10 years ago

      i totally have to agree with that. but i'd stretch it to say that man died in 1992. but that's just me, personally.

      looks like i had 35 of 32 filled. guessed i had them when i was a sponsor and didn't delete any off. out of those, i think i only really paid attention to about 10. man was i horrible about actually commenting on stuff, too. i bet people thought i never looked at anything

    • aladyoftool

      10 years ago

      Exactly. My family is a born and raised Southern family. I had the benefit of moving away when I was three, and I spent my life from age 3 to about age 12 moving around the midwest. So now, I've lived back in the South (mostly in rural Mississippi) for the past 10 years.

      Because of this lineage, my mother insists that I be a "typical Southern gal," and she gets highly upset with me for being so interested in literature and computers. When I was a teenager, she would actually yell at me for not being interested in "normal things" like shopping for clothes when I'd geek out over a new computer program that came out.

      And now, at 22 years old, I still get nagged out for silly things when I go home. The recent one on her mind is that I don't "talk Southern enough." Because I don't say "ya'll" and "ain't," my mother believes, and I quote, that I "don't appreciate my heritage and my home." Because I say "you guys" or directly address someone instead of saying "ya'll."

    • sev_ered

      10 years ago

      that's a hell of a lot of watch spots. i don't know how many i have, but i know that only like 30 are filled. because i apparently hate people? not sure. but you're there. i know that much.

      also, personal question. should i be sad that michael jackson died? i mean, i loved the man's work when i was little. everything up to, and including the Dangerous album were awesome beyond comprehension. then he just got really white and creepy. in a sense, he died to me. so it's quite the conundrum

    • sev_ered

      10 years ago

      can't say i expected to be a commenter either, but i bit the bullet and signed in to a complete rape of alerts. but it's worth it. i think.

      i really gotta keep thinking about something to do that's even more awesome than the muppets. it's just hard. that was too incredible for words.

      and hi jackie bean!!!!

    • dude_stud

      10 years ago

      Fuck it.

      Post edited 6/25/09 6:25PM

    • dude_stud

      10 years ago

      Any reason for so much dislike all of a sudden? You never made it so obvious before. I'm just a little taken back by it.

      I would also like to ask you nicely not to take swipes at me anymore. Please?

    • Psycholagny Resident of Old Olney

      10 years ago

      smiley12.gif

    • Cabose91

      10 years ago

      This also make me look illiterate.

    • Cabose91

      10 years ago

      This make me think of you. smiley12.gifHugh Laurie.

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