mofiaweare

Female
from Aiea, HI

  • Activity

    • Impromptu Trips

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      My boyfriend is finally home. There've been some bumps, but mostly it's been wonderful. We have a duel battlestation for our PCs, we've been playing on our new PS4, and just...enjoying life together.

      We decided to fly to Washington to see his family, backpack, and go camping. Unfortunately, he has all the best pictures of us and hasn't shared them yet...so, here's two of the photos I have:

      10703651_10202695568658401_1267846660855

      10622918_10202699255030558_7154848047120

    • Reaching a Goal

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      While my significant other has been gone, I made it a goal of mine to have a life formed for when he got back. I realized, recently, I've done well in regard to this goal. I've made new friends, I've found new hobbies, I've kept busy. I made a new friend that I call an "imprint" friend, and have gotten closer with a girl that everyone told me I would "love." It's been wonderful.

      Last night, my friend texted me telling me that HE had a dream my SO surprised me with returning home. I joked about my brain being a jerk and infecting other brains. Last night, when I woke up around 0430 (like I randomly do), I found 2 messages from my SO. He was talking about coming home!!! Why my friend gets prophetic dreams, and mine are just cruel, I don't know and don't care. But he could be coming home soon!

    • Journaling as a Way to Vent

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      I tend not to drink alone a lot because I see it as a bad signifier (for good reason). Drinking alone is a (not so terrible) sign of alcoholism.

      I should be pretty happy right now. I just had a job interview. I'm making new friends here.

      But I'm not. And, for some reason, I decided tonight was a good time to drink. Wine hits me harder than booze. Or maybe I just don't keep track of the amount I've had to drink quite like when I'm drinking a whiskey sour or a lemonade with vodka. But I'm almost done a bottle of wine right now, so...

      I really just want to bitch because right now. Just because you sign up for something, doesn't mean it's what you want. It doesn't mean you knew everything about all your possible alternatives, because--in some cases, you can't know. You're making a decision with a huge blind spot. I moved to Hawaii knowing that my boyfriend would be deployed. Believing, wholeheartedly, that it would be 6 months without being able to hold him, hug him...but I've gone 5--nearly 6--weeks without a single word from him. Not one. He warned me that there would be no contact coming up...but it sucks.

      How do you prepare yourself for a situation like this? I have no clue when the next email I will receive will be...but technically, every day it is more likely that I will receive an email from him. So when I get emails and they aren't from him, I get angry at my phone for notifying me about emails...or notifying me about anything that uses the same sound. The other night, when I was with 2 friends, I literally tossed my tablet (gently) because the notification was for a game not an email from him.

      I've had to deal with dreams about him coming home. I've had to deal with my friend bitching about being celibate...for a period of time shorter than the amount of time I've gone without hearing a word from him. I've had to deal with people flirting with me while taken, while being able to talk to their girlfriend and being able to count down the days until they can see them again.

      And I don't want to talk about this with anyone. How I manage to push things down...to never speak about this huge hole in my life... I have no idea. I think I just want want to appear ok, to appear as if I can handle it, because I've always been independent...outside of one crutch on whom I want to lean (my boyfriend). I don't even use the crutch as much as I should (when he's here).

      So...tonight, I drank. And played video games I could barely manage. And listened to songs that remind me of my boyfriend. Because today, without my two closest friends out here to distract me, I feel...lost. I don't know why it's hitting me so badly tonight, but tonight it is.

    • Evil Dreams

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      I'm fairly certain my dreams are conspiring to try and make me depressed. In the past week, I've had two dreams about my boyfriend. In the first, he called me and told me that I would have to pick him up the next day. It was so real, I had to check my phone when I woke up to ensure that it was just a dream.

      Last night's was worse though. I hadn't been sleeping much last night, as I'd randomly woken up at 0400 and my friend had mid watch so we were texting. I managed to get back to sleep at 0600...and in a period of 17 minutes I managed to dream. My family were flying out to visit me, and I had just picked them up at the airport. We were still waiting for some reason. My mom makes a comment about airline miles, and leads me to believe they flew out someone else. I was hoping for one of my two best friends from grad school. I remember suddenly being on the phone with my boyfriend and, realizing he had to be in port somewhere, I asked him where he was. He told me to he was coming down the hallway towards me, and that I should look up. I could feel myself start to cry, and rushed towards him. Just as I was about to be in his arms, I woke up, crying.

      My dreams are cruel... I would give so much to be able to have my boyfriend home with me.

    • Pretending to be a Tourist in Hawaii

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      One of my good friends on the island has some out-of-state friends visiting her, and I've been tagging along on their adventures, since I did not have much time to do the tourist-type things before my boyfriend was deployed.

      We hiked Manoa Falls, which is a cake walk of a hike, and you get to see a pretty waterfall.
      10553460_10203128991723401_7654983289211

      We completed the 2008 Guinness Book of World Records' World's Largest Maze. As well as eating Dole Plantation's delicious pineapple ice cream.
      10449488_10202299042185487_5906574137406

      We saw sea turtles at Turtle Beach.
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      We hiked to Maunawili Falls and jumped off cliff into the pools below. That hike was incredibly muddy, but incredibly fun.
      10491120_10202310966803595_6355893804944

      We visited Pearl Harbor, which is an amazingly moving trip.
      10418535_10202316252455733_1048290249811

      Hawaii is an awesome place to spend time and explore.

    • Female Empowerment

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      Two companies have been putting forth an effort to change the way we treat girls as they are growing up, and the commercials are both amazing.

      This commercial is from Verizon. I was pretty stunned when I saw that it was Verizon behind it, but really glad that they're working on getting out this message. It hit home for me because my name is Samantha, too, but I was fortunate that my parents were much more accepting of whatever I put my mind towards. I would play in the mud, come up with crazy projects, etc. If I'd chosen to go into engineering, I'm sure they would've been as supportive as when I told them I was going into psychology. I wish I had gotten into computer programming from an earlier age, or that my tomboyish side would have been encouraged to grow instead of merely accepted. I genuinely hope this commercial makes a difference when individuals are raising their children.

      This commercial from Always is the second one I saw, but probably the one that stuck with me more. I remember the confusion I faced when hearing the term "like a girl," but it began to fade. Once I was in a late teen, when people would make that comment, I would just say that I was a girl. I feel like I've done my best to ignore it and to show people that women can be contenders, too. But this commercial makes me want to do more.

      Finally, a special add-on I just found online. The Navy has pinned their first female Four Star Admiral. She will be taking the position of Vice Chief of Naval Operations, which is the no. 2 position in the Navy (making her the first female and first African American to do so). That's pretty darn remarkable, especially to have gone so far in such a heavily male dominated environment. Hopefully, she gets a lot of press about this so that she too can be a role-model for women in an age where people have the concept that girls are supposed to be "pretty" and the term "like a girl" is so derogatory.

    • A moment of gaming history

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      Apparently, my 8yr anniversary at Rooster Teeth also marked the 18th birthday of the N64. This is important to me, because the N64 was my first console. Yes, I had an oh-so-beautiful Gameboy Pocket at the age of 7 (thanks Poppy), but I asked for the N64 for my 9 birthday. I clearly remember my mom trying to lead me off her trail that she had bought it for me.

      I received my console, and along the line got 4 awesome looking controls, and a myriad of games I can no longer find, unfortunately. I probably lost them during one of my moves to college.

      Either way, it holds a very special place in my heart. So, happy belated birthday to the console I love so dearly.

      N64-Console-Set.jpg

      and now back to Vampire: The Masquerated - Bloodlines on the PC...

    • The woes of Steam Sales and poor impulse control

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      Since the Steam sale started I have purchased 8 games and a game collection, which would be wonderful as I'm playing more and more PC games nowadays. However, I don't have a job, so this is pretty much just...straight loss of money. Whatever, I'm still enjoying myself. In fact, I bought and beat Broken Age (Act 1) today. The game was incredibly good considering how short it was. I love Tim Schafer.

      In the mean time, I will probably continue playing some of the other games I bought. I wish I had more friends on Steam to play with. I've been playing Borderlands with a friend of mine who lives 6 time zones ahead of me, which makes things slightly complicated, but it's still a ton of fun.

      It's really amusing to look over my previous, very sparse, entries. Especially in regard to Ian, my boyfriend. I have a just met entry, a 2wks of dating entry, seeing each other around our first Christmas, living together... We broke up for about 7 months (it's been almost a year since the break up), and it was a weird 7 months, where we still talked, still knew we loved each other, but weren't together. He even offered to have me move out to Hawaii while we were apart. And now I'm here, in Hawaii, living in our place together...while he's deployed. I'm glad I have friends out here, but it still really sucks. I get sporadic emails from him (it's been about 1 email every 3 or 4 days). He may come home as soon as a month and a half from now...or it may be another 5 months. I don't feel comfortable talking about this stuff with my friends because I don't want to appear weak or whiny. I don't want him to be the only thing I talk about, so instead I almost never talk about him, or at least him being gone.

      So I just keep on with my life...I play video games, watch movies, hang out with friends, do kickboxing and yoga, go to the beach, bake, cook...and write lots of emails. Nothing else to do. I refuse to let this take me down. I just...wish he were here.

    • Accidentally logged in on my 8yr anniversary

      5 years ago

      mofiaweare

      It's so hard to believe I've been on this site for 8yrs. Jeez. I've GRADUATED with my master's, built my own PC and have become more of a PC gamer. Moved to Hawaii to live with my boyfriend...

      ...and no one will probably read this. But hey... I've been on this site 8 years now. If that isn't awesome, I don't know what is.

    • I suck at updating here.

      7 years ago

      mofiaweare

      I'd be lying if I said that I was just ignoring this site. I...totally forgot it existed. Since my last entry, I've graduated undergrad, selected a graduate school (Eastern Michigan University), had my 6 month anniversary of dating Ian, reached level 50 on SWTOR, started playing Diablo III (battle tag is csifbi23#1309 -- have a level 39 barbarian in nightmare, and a lvl 26 monk in normal), read Clash of Kings. I've done SO much.

      Currently, I am living with my boyfriend. It's all going splendidly-I do a lot of baking, cooking and cleaning. It's totally worth it for all the fun aspects that I adore about him, and to see the smile on his face when he--or I--come home. I love sitting and cuddling with him.

      I made a new friend (a Navy fiancee). We spent probably about a half-hour together and we're already counting down the time until we get to hang out again. She's a sweetheart and I'm so excited to click with someone like that.

      I obtained a summer job as a personal assistant/babysitter for a disabled woman and her son. The son is a sweet kid who has a mild crush on me, the mother is very nice and seems to be suffering from a truly unusual and rare combination of disorders.

      I still haven't played ME3...it's one a very long list of games I need to start/finish: Alan Wake, Arkham City, Assassin's Creed 2, Bioshock, Brutal Legend, Catherine, Kameo, L.A. Noire, LEGO Harry Potter Years 5-7, LEGO Star Wars, ME2 replay...it's silly. That list is silly long.

      Hope you're all doing well.

  • Comments (1971)

    • TabbyKat

      5 years ago

      Hello, lady ma'am. How're you doing?

      • TabbyKat

        5 years ago

        Life is good! I'm still working at the college, but now I'm a clown on the weekends. There's so much more money in it than independent tutoring lol. My kids are ridiculously old (Aurora is now in kindergarten and Tony is walking and making his own choices, like refusing to eat cottage cheese), but they're super fun. Also, Miguel and I bought a house last year, so that's groovy.

        What's been going on with you?

      • mofiaweare

        5 years ago

        I'm doing pretty darn well. How about yourself? What's going on in your life recently?

    • TabbyKat

      7 years ago

      I know, I don't get on much these days either.

      Life is good. I'm finally half way through the pregnancy, and the baby is making itself known via kicks and headbutts now. Work is also great, with the exception of me being so busy all the time. It's tough being in high demand. Because of faculty wanting me to do workshops all the time, I don't get to tutor as much as I'd like. We're still pinching pennies, but hopefully Miguel's work will pick up because of Christmas. Aurora is fantastic as always, and is gearing up for the Christmas dance show. They'll be doing a jazz number to "Girls Just Want to Have Fun". So what else is new with you?

    • Nivek7777

      8 years ago

      Happy anniversary sweetheart

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Yo, I am all over that job. I think that would be a sweeeeeet gig, fo sho!

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      That Fred stuff is pretty awesome, I really wanna work at Strand. That would be a fun job.

      Thanks for the well wishes, same to you amiga.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Stand is pretty awesome, I say go crazy. Though you do know many Boarders are closing, hop on those deals!!! Good luck with narrowing those grad schools down, it's no ready tash I'm sure.

      Life is interesting here, job is almost up so I have to find other gainful employment soon. I need a stable job that will pay me good money, but those are hard to come by. Trying to get into school, but my procrastination factor is up 1000% this summer and I really need to get my act together. Other than that, summer is really fun so I hope it doesn't end too soon.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Hey hey, how goes it for ya? Grad school eh? Man, it's been a while, fo sho. Thanks for checking in on me, hope you're doing well. Things on my end have been quite entertaining.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Thanks, I'll keep you posted on how things go w/ it all.

      Good luck, getting into and picking a Grad School will be tricky. As for the summer plans, hopefully you can make time for some fun while you're busy working on the future. Take time to smell the flowers amiga!

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Lots of ups and downs. Still adjusting to life on the East Coast, but I'm workin' on it slowly but surely. Got a new job at the YMCA and am hangin' out w/ a lot of kids, which is pretty cool. Trying to write a lot more; short stories, music, comics, stuff like that. It's been a lot of fun.

      Got any plans for the summer? You excited for the school year to be over?

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Wassup buddy, how're things? It's been a while since we've had a little chat but I'm sure things are going well for you.

      Btw, if you've got free time and wanna hang out and do stuffs w/ the rest of the RvB crew join up in this film group I help start. It'll be fun!

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      THEY SAY IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!
      *Dun nuh nun nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh!*
      It's not my birthday too, yeah!
      *Dun nuh nun nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh!*


      Happy b-day Sam!
      Edit: I think I messed up that Beatles song...

      Post edited 2/23/11 10:36AM

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Not too shabby dudette. Things are good on my end of the world. How 'bout you?

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Dood, that's such a bummer. I really hope he quits, or at least tries to leave it to a pack a week kinda deal.

      Happy New Years btw.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      How much does he smoke?

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Yikes. Yeah, he needs to quit. Or, at least, hold back for a lil bit. Can't quit cold turkey over night so just give up little by little. It can be done.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      What, that PB is awesome? Or that he should choose life?

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      NOOO!!! That does NOT sound good! I hope the elements hold back for ya.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Sweetness! Hope you have fun over vacation time.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Awesome sauce! Hope you can blow the steam off now.

    • 2lazy

      8 years ago

      hey! might not remember me well, as i havent been around in ages, but you are still on the friends list! just thought i say HELLO old e-friend.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      I'll pray for ya buddy. Everybody needs a little luck here and there. Not that I don't think you couldn't find another one. I just want you to get an awesome one. One door closes and another one opens. Hopefully it's a doorway you wanna walk through. I'm really good at saying a whole lot of nothing, aren't I?

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      I trust you'll find something better cuz of this. Seriously, you're born to kick the world's ass.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Hah, I guess that does count for all intents and purposes. Hope the ceremony was good.

      That's really cool. I should check that out. It really does sound awesome.

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      It's not a bad idea to take care of it before it actually hits. Seriously, you should think about preemptive strike!

    • Suto_Griff

      8 years ago

      Dudette, I hear ya there. Being sick is no fun. Right now I'm on the tail end of a sickness I started to get last weekend. Luckily I'm pretty much over it and all, but with the weather being like it is right now it seems like I won't stay healthy for much longer. Good luck w/ your stuffs.

    • Zack FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Zatch

      8 years ago

      I'm not sure. I think if I upgrade, I need to get a smartphone. I'm not sure I want to do that unless it's an iPhone...but maaaaaaaybe the Incredible...I just don't know.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Hey Sam, just wanted to check in w/ ya and see that you're alright.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      What is 1 book 1 twitter?

      What is that movie? Haven't heard a thing about the peeps v. GL.

      Just punch her in the sack. It'll make you feel better, at the very least.

      DVR. Is. AWESOME!

    • Jonus

      9 years ago

      We just drove to Florida a month ago, and going through the states the only time I noticed anyone talking any different than back home was when we stopped in West Virginia. I was almost afraid to talk because I knew I'd sound different to them, or I'd accidentally that talking with their accent.

      With individual words I think it mainly depends on how you were brought up. Maybe it does have to do with your area, but if you're raised by your parents who pronounce "crayon" as "cran" (that's how my wife says it) then that's how you'll say it too.

    • TabbyKat

      9 years ago

      Miguel is 6' 5" now. He grew an inch sometime in the last 4 years. It was really weird.

    • TabbyKat

      9 years ago

      When I met Miguel he was only 14-years-old... and 5'11". CRAZY!!

      And was that Disney World?

    • Cerberus_

      9 years ago

      So, "libary?"

      Or is it buh-ry? :)

    • Zack FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Zatch

      9 years ago

      yeah. the magic ring system looks good. and i like the ever-changing weapon system idea. so maybe i'll wait til reviews come out. maybe i'll borrow it from a friend if any buy it.

      i am...not so swell. maybe i'll put it in a journal so i don't have to retell it 20 times.

    • Zack FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Zatch

      9 years ago

      mmm fable 3...that is one i forgot. i might get it. it looks really good and has the potential to be really boring. (no menus...walking around to closets to change clothes...BORING! and more about keeping promises to people...BORING!)

      but we'll see!

    • TabbyKat

      9 years ago

      Windowless room? That sounds like umimaginable torture.

      Well, looking for a job sucks, especially since I spent so much money and time getting a degree and all the jobs I want also require 3-5 years experience. How does one get experience, pray tell, if one cannot get the job without it? It's mind boggling. I've been looking on a few state government websites for job seekers, though, so hopefully I'll get something soon.

      Aurora's doing great. She played with Barbies for the first time this morning, which was hilarious. Apparently her Barbies just dance to the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse theme song. They've gotta start somewhere.

    • TabbyKat

      9 years ago

      How's it going?

    • Zack FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Zatch

      9 years ago

      it's on my rvb About Me

      @zackbenimble

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Ah, I see. Well I get that. And it's probably not a bad idea to take off a year. But do you think you could do the research and take up some other hobby or side project so as not to get too saturated with your own field?

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Wait a second, you're telling me that if you took a year off of school you'd be worse off then those who just went straight into it?! That's whack, yo. But I understand. Either way, good luck with your school stuffs.

      But SIX MORE YEARS??? You must REALLY like school.

    • TabbyKat

      9 years ago

      It ended like most papers.... he threw it together haphazardly, I killed it with my pen and made it bleed green (the color I use for correcting papers), and he revised it without letting me look at it a second time. We have a very hostile working relationship.

      Aurora is doing great. She just got done eating a bowl of cereal, asked for more, and now without eating any of the new stuff I poured, she wants to leave the table. She's so 2.

      Post edited 5/13/10 10:07AM

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      What would you do in grad school? And either way, you should totally take a year off before you get back into the swing of school. It'll be nice to get school off your mind for a bit.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      But, yeah, when I head out East we'll be sure to meet up. Should be fun.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Maybe you're on the wrong coast... smiley8.gif

      Just sayin'.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Planin' on leavin' round the begining of August and bein' in NYC by the 9th or 10th. Should be a fun ride too cuz we're gonna do Route 66 to Chicago and then head on over to NYC. And if I can make it work I'll come visit ya. It'll be sweet to meet another person from RvB.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      I'm actually feelin' pretty darn good. About a lot of it. Things are lookin' kinda shaky for my move, but that's cuz I feel like there are a million things I have to take care of before I go. And all I really have to do is take it one thing at a time. But I'm excited, that's for sure. Just gotta figure out all the lil details before the end of this month that way my last two months here in the city aren't so crazy.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      It's interesting cuz she called last night and wanted to talk to me. But she didn't really want to have a conversation with me, she just wanted to talk at me. All I know is is that she's not really in the mood to change her personality, that's for sure.

      It's good to know that you've got the colsure, glad things are better this way than not.


      Post edited 5/04/10 2:26AM

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Thanks for sharing that with me, I know it must've been hard for you to do so. I'm so sorry that happened to you. It's never a good moment in your life when you find out that happened to you and trying to move forward is so hard... But I'm glad that you got closure from it and am glad that you can move on from it.

      For me I doubt I'll ever get closure on the situation. She and I have talked three times since I broke up with her in early January. She never wants to talk about us not being together or the past, so we can't ever really talk about anything serious. It's just the way it is.

    • Zack FIRST Member Star(s) Indication of membership status - One star is a FIRST member, two stars is Double Gold Zatch

      9 years ago

      aww no i don't follow him. sad! maybe i will now...

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      Eh, I don't think so. Being sick is never a good thing.

      Me? I'm just peachy. Needing to get all this crazy amount of work done soon, but other than that it's all gravy.

    • Suto_Griff

      9 years ago

      This is not a status update I can get on board with.

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